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As yall know I had this in the past a couple years ago. Fully recovered and now im back. I actually havent even a clue what im experiencing this time. I mean I know its dp as theres nothing else remotely like it and the way im thinking is similiar to my past experience with this. But I actually just feel like wtf is going on ? Like im so confused just being here sitting in a sitting room. Its existential but its more complicated this time. I am thinking about my whole life from the outside. Eg. I am aware that my parents had me and brought me here and that my mind only knows this place. Yet the very fact that im aware of that makes me feel detatched from my own mind. Sounds crazy. I dont feel like what is happening is happening right now. Things look unfamiliar and my family does too. But almost like the present moment is a memory of a place I used to live with people I used to know. But its not current. I keep wondering how I thought before but I cannot access that part of me. My mind feels warped. I feel like my memories are not mine but I remember them. I feel like a new born almost and I just cant make heads or tails of whats going on. Things are clear lookimg but they feel eerie. I feel blocked off from me but I then think maybe I was never me or never belonged here. Does anyone end up believing there thoughts sometimes to the point that when people say u will recover ur like from what ? This makes sense or something. Yet its disturbing me. Yall probably think im talking gibberish. Its very hard to put into words really is. I know alot of these thoughts are just my mind trying to make sense of the dissociated feelings. But I just feel like there is no normal to go back to cause like I cant feel it or really remember it although I logically know I felt it a couple weeks ago before this started. Any help or relating would be great. Katie
