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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
It's my birthday today (allegedly) and I feel rubbish.

I just can't deal with these constant 'synchronicities' anymore. I just don't believe I'm in the real world because of it. It seems too ridiculous and impossible to be real.

Every time I look at my phone The time ends in a 7. Every time! It must be a creation of fantasy. And to make matters worse I'm still getting these constant significant coincidences. Today's one, someone on TV had their birthday announced live on air, the first time I've seen that happen in ages...on my birthday.

I feel like everyone else on here is fully convinced they have this disorder. But I'm not and that makes me feel trapped because I feel I'm in a world of my own. I think everything is all a part of my imagination, and created by me. This world just isn't working the right way to be the real world.

Fuck this.
 

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I'm sorry!
Well, don't say "allegedly". Say, yes it is my birthday, and no I'm not letting this ruin it! Just pretend it's not there, please don't let this ruin your birthday.
It's an important date. Get outside, go on a walk.
It's hard, but it's important to know that you have the control. If you don't want to get out and feel better, you won't feel better. If you do go out and make an effort to smile, you will feel better. It's hard to believe and it's hard to do, but it's true.

I hope this doesn't sound harsh, that's not what I meant if it does.

This won't last forever, the pain won't last forever. You are ok, and you will be ok. Message me if you need help. :mrgreen:

From the bottom of my heart, happy birthday! :)
 

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my birthday was 2 days ago, kinda sucked, my girl and my family had a good time, i was to busy feeling like hell during it, kinda sucked

idk man just gotta keep living, id say dont even think those thoughts, just go about ur day and ignore them as much as u can, and if they pop up, just continue doing what u were doing
 

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I know the pain all too well. But I'm thinking positve and saying next birthday is gonna be amazing! Mine is in March and this year I was 2 weeks into my relapse when my birthday came and I stayed in bed and did nothing because I was squirming in mental hell. So here's to next birthday!!!
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Thanks for all the positive messages. I ended up sort of zoning out and not paying too much attention. I've come up with a way of fighting seeing the 7's, by keeping a tally of what number I see every time I look at my phone. 1 won in a landslide. Hopefully this will help in days to come.

Still don't have a solution to the coincidences though. It's a hard thing to accept because it really does feel like I'm creating these things, yet at the same time have no clue which one will come up next. All I do know is they are frequent and I want them to stop!
 

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Thanks for all the positive messages. I ended up sort of zoning out and not paying too much attention. I've come up with a way of fighting seeing the 7's, by keeping a tally of what number I see every time I look at my phone. 1 won in a landslide. Hopefully this will help in days to come.

Still don't have a solution to the coincidences though. It's a hard thing to accept because it really does feel like I'm creating these things, yet at the same time have no clue which one will come up next. All I do know is they are frequent and I want them to stop!
Everyone has periods in their lives where they experience a lot of coincidences. I have my periods where in a couple weeks span, I have a lot of coincidences happening to me. I've asked my friends if they experience this too (they, by the way, don't even know what DP is) and they do.
I have those weeks maybe two times a year, maybe a little more.
 

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I just can't deal with these constant 'synchronicities' anymore. I just don't believe I'm in the real world because of it. It seems too ridiculous and impossible to be real.

Every time I look at my phone The time ends in a 7. Every time! It must be a creation of fantasy. And to make matters worse I'm still getting these constant significant coincidences. Today's one, someone on TV had their birthday announced live on air, the first time I've seen that happen in ages...on my birthday.
This is a common phenomenon caused by cognitive bias. This cognitive bias is called frequency illusion, but also goes under the name Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon.

Our brains are built to establish and recognize patterns. This is how most learning works. For instance, take a look at this grand-master chess game for just a few moments. See how fast they're moving their pieces? See how their timers in the back only allot them five minutes each for the entire game? This is because they have played so much that they can understand patterns without needing a crazy amount of time. They have taught their brains to acknowledge chess patterns subconsciously and play accordingly.

This is how our brains work on a fundamental level. While you may not notice these patterns throughout your day-to-day routine, your subconscious does a great job of picking them out for you. This is where the frequency illusion comes from. You've created this idea in your head that the world must be fake, correct? Since you've designed this for yourself, your subconscious is now projecting that paradigm onto everything around you. What's left to do is finding a pattern that might elude to the idea that the world is fake:

  • The way you keep seeing the number 7 on the clock.
  • The way someone had their birthday announced on the television.
  • The heart condition from the wrestler you mentioned in another post.

Now that you're fixated on the 7, the birthday, or the wrestler - your mind is selectively pulling these out and raising red flags in your head.

Think about it in this way for a moment.

Our world is surrounded by a trillion pieces of information, right? Billboards, conversations, television, music, computers, cellphones, et cetera. Given that the amount of information that passes through our society, it isn't crazy to think that coincidences happen all the time. If it wasn't the number 7, it might have been the number 2 - maybe even 8, 15, or 27. The point is that your mind found the pattern in the number 7 specifically so you are selectively paying attention to any other pattern that may elicit the same response and fit into the worldview that you have: that the world is fake and 7 is behind it all.

I wrote a blog post about this too, hopefully this can shed a bit more light onto this synchronicity issue you've been having.
 

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Thanks for taking the time and writing such a detailed reply Solomon. I can definitely see the frequency illusion in the numbers and I have read up on baader meinhof before.

The 'coincidences' really do bother me though, because unlike the numbers, it's not the same one over and over again. I can expect to see at least one completely new coincidence each day and it just brings up also many confusing questions and philosophical ideas. I think it is exacerbated by the fact I do seem to be in my own bubble not truly knowing whether I'm real or not, and yet people seem to react to me like I am normal. I'm having real difficulty with perception. Things that didn't seem magic before, now seem magic and impossible to me. I question how I can be in control when all of my emotions are controlled by chemical reactions not in my control. It's just a philosophical minefield. And it's easy to say just try to get on with it and it will pass, but what if I'm right? What if everything and everyone truly are created by my mind? What if this is actually the correct way I am meant to think and I've finally just connected the dots, and realised I am the creator of everything I see. That means I am alone, and I don't want to be alone.

Do you think I am creating this evidence myself? Do you think everyone has lots of different wacky coincidences each day, they just don't notice?

I've had at least 3 that I can think of today. First one was how I had a dream that my brother was destroying a Fred Perry polo of mine last night, go in to a charity shop, first thing I see, a Fred Perry polo. That was fine, I managed to explain that away with chance. But then the second one. Earlier today I see a post online with a picture of a retro computer game I had never seen or heard of, fast forward to this afternoon, see that exact game in another charity shop. Will probably never see that game again. Lastly, in a sports shop? It has loads of signed memorabilia, go home, first thing I see when I turn the tv on? A guy talking about sporting memorabilia.

This is why it bothers me. I know that I am actively looking for these things to happen. But can never predict what those things will be, unlike with the 7's. I can guarantee I will see another rare thing twice tomorrow and never see it again.

Sorry for the long negative reply!
 

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The 'coincidences' really do bother me though, because unlike the numbers, it's not the same one over and over again. I can expect to see at least one completely new coincidence each day and it just brings up also many confusing questions and philosophical ideas. I think it is exacerbated by the fact I do seem to be in my own bubble not truly knowing whether I'm real or not, and yet people seem to react to me like I am normal. I'm having real difficulty with perception. Things that didn't seem magic before, now seem magic and impossible to me. I question how I can be in control when all of my emotions are controlled by chemical reactions not in my control. It's just a philosophical minefield. And it's easy to say just try to get on with it and it will pass, but what if I'm right? What if everything and everyone truly are created by my mind? What if this is actually the correct way I am meant to think and I've finally just connected the dots, and realised I am the creator of everything I see. That means I am alone, and I don't want to be alone.
I know what I'm about to say is easier said than done, but the true way to overcome this is to stop engaging with it all together.

Reassuring yourself has become your compulsion and because this is a compulsion, you are ruminating. Since you are ruminating, you are perpetuating these thoughts constantly. Since you are perpetuating these thoughts, the only logical conclusion in your head is that you have to find something to reassure you again. You're caught in a loop here and it'll never stop. Likewise, any reassurance that you give yourself will likely never be enough for your obsessions. Whether you recognize it or not, the true problem here is that you are continuing to give these thoughts weight.

I mean, just look at what you've done here.

I gave you every verifiable means of combating these thoughts and understanding the illusion behind coincidences. Yet, your mind conceded to your obsessions and you found away around the reassurance. This is how obsessive thoughts operate. It won't matter how many times I tell you that the world isn't fake and that you're experiencing a very normal occurrence in every day life. As long as your brain is continuing to churn and ruminate over these thoughts, nothing anyone says will ever be good enough to keep these thoughts at bay.

That's why the therapy used to treat these thoughts is not about teaching you why they're wrong, but rather teaching you not to engage with them at all.

Here's something that my therapist gave me. I've been dealing with hypochondria these past few months. It's nearly ruined my life and I can't stand thinking about the medical dilemmas that I feel like I'll be going through in the future. When I mentioned this to my psychologist, she told me this:

  • When you have an obsessive thought that frightens you, tell yourself audibly that you are having an irrational thought and go do something else.

That doesn't mean tell yourself that and ruminate. It doesn't mean think about it for only a couple seconds. It means to literally get up from your chair and go engage in another activity. If the thought keeps popping up, keep audibly telling yourself the same thing. Try as best as you can to distract yourself from the thought. After doing this for about a week, I've noticed my symptoms lessening ever so slightly. It'll take a bit for your brain to finally come around; remember, you've conditioned your mind to create this circular thinking. However, the more you keep at it, the more you'll find it taking less a hold of your life.

Have you ever considered seeing a psychologist for something about this? Certainly they could help you with cognitive-behavioral therapy and lead you to recovery much better than I can, haha.

Sorry for the long negative reply!
Never apologize for how you feel. :)
 
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