[Mochan]

Hey there.

I've been experiencing full dp/dr (24/7) for more than a year now.
To cope with it I play a lot of video games to make me forget about it, it's the only that can keep my mind occupied. But once I move away from my tv and go out for a walk outside, the dp/dr hits me like a tank. Sometimes I'm too afraid or too disoriented to even go outside beceause of it.
I then realized that it's much worse when I'm in open spaces.

Does anyone have this too?

 

[Guest]

Hey there.

I've been experiencing full dp/dr (24/7) for more than a year now.
To cope with it I play a lot of video games to make me forget about it, it's the only that can keep my mind occupied. But once I move away from my tv and go out for a walk outside, the dp/dr hits me like a tank. Sometimes I'm too afraid or too disoriented to even go outside beceause of it.
I then realized that it's much worse when I'm in open spaces.

Does anyone have this too?

Yes, I have agoraphobia combined with DPD and experience this. Here's a post I wrote on it:

http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/48730-staying-home-with-depersonalization/#entry343215

I am not a professional, but if DPD could be considered a a protective mechanism in some, it would make sense it would worsen in a situation the brain interprets as more dangerous. Going outside would expose you to more 'danger.' You could experience this worsening of depersonalization a couple times, and now your brain has filed it as a threat.

I have an enormous fear of wide open spaces, such as fields, large parkings lots etc. If I had to make a guess, I would assume this is due to a lack of immediate hiding or 'safe' places that would date back to our early days. This is speculation of course.

 

[Mochan]

I've experienced agoraphobia in the past, but I recovered from that a few years ago.
I think maybe the worsening of the symptoms may be beceause I fill all my time with tablets/tv's/computer screens. All of them are in close range of my sight, but I'm not sure

 

[Guest]

I would assume it has more do with being occupied for awhile with gaming and then turning back to awareness of DPD.

 

[Aerin]

A couple things. I enjoy games too, and I still played them a lot when I first got DP, but I found they actually made DP worse. Perhaps not while my focus was grabbed by the game, but as a rebound effect. They took my attention away from DP while playing BUT, at the same time, they are essentially a way to further train the mind to work with a third person avatar (think about it).

Open spaces, crowds, and certain kinds of lighting (lighting that is often present in crowded places like supermarkets, trainstations etc - usually fluorescents) also triggered (trigger) it for me, but I can confidently state in this regard that the effect (in my case anyway) has to with perceiving motion or light patterns mildly as touch. This is a vague physical sensation that's hard to definitively localize - but around my 'back', behind/ above me on 'the side opposite the screen' sotospeak. If there are a lot of people, the motion of the people does it. If I am in an open space then there is also more 'depth' and relative movement between objects. The exact reasons may be different for you but I can't emphasize enough that the reaction, for me, had nothing - nothing - to do with certain places, or fear of people, per se and is 100% the result of the sensory input. It went: perception of (too much) motion ---> sensation of touch ---> 'the images are like a bubble inside my head so where am I really? What's 'outside' really?' ---> brain overload.

Once I realized the triggers and came to terms with the conclusions things have been way easier. Precisely identifying the triggers is very important I think.

 

[maferumu]

Hi, I just wanted to say that this happens to me too. In my case I think anxiety, probably social anxiety, makes it worse. But I feel dp the most when Im driving and pass through a very open space or near anything high. I have jumped from a plane before with a parachute so I dont think is a fear of heights issue, but when it started a few years ago, it started as I was driving in Houston on a freeway and I had to get on a tall bridge/street and all of a sudden felt out of my body and feeling like I was dreaming and that I could easily let go of the steering wheel and not even feel a thing. I had to stop getting on any tall part on the freeway, there are a ton in Houston. Last week I had a bad episode, I had to call my husband to pick me up because I was in the car with my kid and had it bad. I had to go on an hour long ride back and forth and I noticed later than it got worse every time the freeway openrd up and there were more lanes,, as well as when it started to get dark and more street lights appear. I have felt dp at the grocery store many times as well as an uneasy feeling at restaurants when I have to sit in the middle of the place, so now I always sit on a corner where I have some time of wall or protective barrier that gives me a sense of stability and makes me feel more grounded in mu body. It's so strange honestly. Sometimes I even feel a quick and sudden falling sensation that sort of takes me out of body and brings me back at the same time, sort of when you go down a rollercoaster. And this feeling I've felt while driving and moving my arm slightly, in the middle of a classroom in college and I experienced dp and suddenly tried to move my arm to fix my hair and felt the same jumpy sensation. Before knowing it was dp, I imagined these sensations being like what I imagine to be an out of body experience of a soul leaving a body like in astral traveling. Dp feels so strange