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Living life totally the wrong way.........Unhealthy / Using Drugs / Drinking Too Much Alcohol / Not Eating Right / Not Exercising Enough / Hanging Out With The Wrong People / Avoiding Work and Other Every Day Responsibilities / Etc Etc Etc............

Which is why I developed DP......

I have since changed ALL of this.........

So in fact DP was a huge life lesson for me...."Wake the f*** up and start living the way you are meant to live"
 

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I personally haven’t stopped doing most of the stuff I do now. Still in school, work everyday, vacation every couple months, exercise, still party etc, not as often as I did b4. But b4 dp I was more wreckless w/ my body, I partied a lot, as a female I have a high tolerance for alcohol so I always drank, had gotten out of a relationship and was dating and hooking up with guys. I got dp from a panic attack drinking too much caffeine ???? but I always see it as a lesson that I need to take care of myself, love myself and listen to my body’s needs.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Living life totally the wrong way.........Unhealthy / Using Drugs / Drinking Too Much Alcohol / Not Eating Right / Not Exercising Enough / Hanging Out With The Wrong People / Avoiding Work and Other Every Day Responsibilities / Etc Etc Etc............

Which is why I developed DP......

I have since changed ALL of this.........

So in fact DP was a huge life lesson for me...."Wake the f*** up and start living the way you are meant to live"
Sometimes I wonder if there was no way for me to learn the important things I learned if I didn't get DP, at least not at this age and stage of life...

I'm glad... in a way... DP showed you the right direction

I personally haven't stopped doing most of the stuff I do now. Still in school, work everyday, vacation every couple months, exercise, still party etc, not as often as I did b4. But b4 dp I was more wreckless w/ my body, I partied a lot, as a female I have a high tolerance for alcohol so I always drank, had gotten out of a relationship and was dating and hooking up with guys. I got dp from a panic attack drinking too much caffeine but I always see it as a lesson that I need to take care of myself, love myself and listen to my body's needs.
It's funny, isn't it, that maybe someone who observes your life from the outside wouldn't say your has changed much.. but little do they know

now you say it, could I have had mine from too much caffeine? who knows lol
 

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Sometimes I wonder if there was no way for me to learn the important things I learned if I didn't get DP, at least not at this age and stage of life...
I'm glad... in a way... DP showed you the right direction

It's funny, isn't it, that maybe someone who observes your life from the outside wouldn't say your has changed much.. but little do they know
now you say it, could I have had mine from too much caffeine? who knows lol
Right but It's hard though trying to act like everything is okay when it's not lol my friends and family know I have "anxiety" if I explained dp, they would probably think I'm really crazy. What were you like b4 this?
 

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I don't know if you know about or subscribe to MBTI types but I an ENFP and I was pretty much exactly that. Super outgoing, had a ton of friends, always working on creative projects, had plans to travel when i got out of school, wanted to save the world. Now I'm.. well none of that lol. Just scared and out of it. Don't have many friends anymore and the ones I do have I don't see. I can barely go outside.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Right but It's hard though trying to act like everything is okay when it's not lol my friends and family know I have "anxiety" if I explained dp, they would probably think I'm really crazy. What were you like b4 this?
Right?

I've explained DP to my mom, printing out clinical symptoms and all. Don't think she really got it. She still thinks it's some form of same ol' depression of mine and that's it.

I got DP when I was a teenager. I loved spending time alone, and that's mostly all I did. My inner life had always been so rich that it was more than enough being with myself, even if I was doing nothing. I loved me.

I danced a lot, almost all day, in the mirror. This thing is impossible now. Unless I wanted to risk aggravating all my symptoms and be in a foggy disorienting mental state for the rest of the day, or time.

My reflection triggers DP. There are times, so rare, but they exist, where I do dance and look at myself and it's 50% okay. Can't have it as a daily habit though anymore.

In being independent of people pre-DP, having DP especially in the beginning was so damaging to my self image! I found myself wanting to run away from myself into social situations ALL the time. Of course everyone had other things to do. Didn't know then it just made things all worse.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
I don't know if you know about or subscribe to MBTI types but I an ENFP and I was pretty much exactly that. Super outgoing, had a ton of friends, always working on creative projects, had plans to travel when i got out of school, wanted to save the world. Now I'm.. well none of that lol. Just scared and out of it. Don't have many friends anymore and the ones I do have I don't see. I can barely go outside.
I get that. The creativity part. I wanted to travel and save the world too haha.

I didn't have many close friends, the ones I did have, I had so much fun being with them. Now, it's more of a burden. Being with people is overwhelming most of the time. I do try my best.
 

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Right?
I've explained DP to my mom, printing out clinical symptoms and all. Don't think she really got it. She still thinks it's some form of same ol' depression of mine and that's it.

I got DP when I was a teenager. I loved spending time alone, and that's mostly all I did. My inner life had always been so rich that it was more than enough being with myself, even if I was doing nothing. I loved me.
I danced a lot, almost all day, in the mirror. This thing is impossible now. Unless I wanted to risk aggravating all my symptoms and be in a foggy disorienting mental state for the rest of the day, or time.
My reflection triggers DP. There are times, so rare, but they exist, where I do dance and look at myself and it's 50% okay. Can't have it as a daily habit though anymore.

In being independent of people pre-DP, having DP especially in the beginning was so damaging to my self image! I found myself wanting to run away from myself into social situations ALL the time. Of course everyone had other things to do. Didn't know then it just made things all worse.
I can't say if I was ever pre-DP, but this pretty much describes the way I used to feel and act, except replace dancing with singing.

Also, I don't really get the mirror thing. In fact, it's usually the opposite for me. Looking into the mirror makes me feel slightly better. I think it's because when I see the person there, I see the person that other people must see when they look at me, and it sort of normalizes me for a moment. I can see that I have a body, etc.

But yeah, I've always had a very rich inner life and enjoyed being by myself much more than being with other people, though I wasn't a total hermit. I had friends, I just couldn't spend a whole lot of time with them on a single occasion. A couple hours max. Then I needed to return home or just drive around aimlessly reflecting on the experience.
 

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Blissful and ignorant...

I wasnt ignorant to the darker aspects of life though and had frequent bouts of depression due to self esteem issues and family issues but i never thought about how and why i or anyone else exists. I had things to strive for even though i didnt fully realize how important it was to have things to strive for at the time (i was 19 when it started) i was and still am at times a creative and "quirky" person as friends have put it. All i wanted to do as a teen was create something the world could enjoy but i always felt someone had already made something better than my own ideas and nowadays i dont even have that same drive. I dont even know what i want or why i keep wanting to live.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
I can't say if I was ever pre-DP, but this pretty much describes the way I used to feel and act, except replace dancing with singing.

Also, I don't really get the mirror thing. In fact, it's usually the opposite for me. Looking into the mirror makes me feel slightly better. I think it's because when I see the person there, I see the person that other people must see when they look at me, and it sort of normalizes me for a moment. I can see that I have a body, etc.

But yeah, I've always had a very rich inner life and enjoyed being by myself much more than being with other people, though I wasn't a total hermit. I had friends, I just couldn't spend a whole lot of time with them on a single occasion. A couple hours max. Then I needed to return home or just drive around aimlessly reflecting on the experience.
Sometimes I wonder if I had DP in early childhood, recovered, and was triggered again.

I'm glad the mirror thing is actually a positive for you!

For me it probably all started staring at a mirror until my face was unrecognizable.

I get it though, as I usually go quite a few days never looking in the mirror, then need to even if for a split of a second, just to remind my brain of belonging to an exterior existence and be more grounded.

I had things to strive for even though i didnt fully realize how important it was to have things to strive for at the time
can relate. Maybe it can be comforting to know, objectively, you're the same person who was capable of all these things, and they're still there somewhere, part of you.

One day, slowly.
 

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This is my first post since probably 2004 or 2005 when I was an active member.

I was really, really confident. Very social and popular. Had a lot of friends. Very bright and attending a top liberal arts school in the country. Making good grades. Was going places. Kind of cocky but had a good heart. That was 1999. The DP/DR hit after about three days of heavy drinking and ecstasy use.

Now I'm not social, struggling with work and family. No confidence and ridden with anxiety, panic attacks, and depression. I've still done OK (by objective measures) but have been battling these demons a long time. The good news is I've made it 20 years with this. It's been very difficult but still worth it.
 

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Do you guys feel like what you used to like now seems distant? I used to play a lot of videogames i was training to maybe be a "professional player" but now it seems distant like i never did that before i can recognize the people i watched but at the same time it seems like im seeing them the first time same with the gsmes i have like 10k hous playing do you guys feel like this too?
 

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Do you guys feel like what you used to like now seems distant? I used to play a lot of videogames i was training to maybe be a "professional player" but now it seems distant like i never did that before i can recognize the people i watched but at the same time it seems like im seeing them the first time same with the gsmes i have like 10k hous playing do you guys feel like this too?
Ive felt exactly that before. Ive played video games for as long as i can remember and yet, in the depths of dp/dr, it felt as if those were never something id done before. That feeling went away tho eventually.
 

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I was oblivious to life, I think DP is really an anxiety of noticing you're existence on a floating rock in an arbitrary universe, you're better of being a monkey and not thinking about it. Mines getting better, I've just learnt not to give a f.
 
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