[Guest]

I don't mean this necessarily in the clinical depression sense. I do wonder sometimes if DP makes things get to me that wouldn't get to a normal person. Would you do me the favor of listing the things that make you depressed/ sad/ full of despair?

Here is my list:

*world news
*noisy squirrels are chewing through my roof
*having to drive/ phobia of traveling
*my extended family (my immediate family is OK)
*very noisy neighbors
*neighbors who break my window
*neighbors who try convert me to born again christianity
*stupid petty things on TV ("Survivor" "Fear Factor"-- what kind of horrible world spawns these shows????)
*cold weather
*worn out by my job
*not having the energy to be creative
*feeling dp when I should be sharp and thinking clearly

thanks

 

[Inflammed]

Angry, stupid people (without common sense)
Not being able to live fully
Fast-food
Never having the energy to finish or begin my projects (creative)
Constant worrying
Not being able to wash myself somtimes because I feel too bad ! :shock:
Having all the potential but not being able to exploit it fully
Not caring about almost everything (money, friends, life-plans)
Waking up in the morning already messed up
Getting spaced out after I went to the movies
Having heart attack like symptoms :roll:
Seeing people drug themself without caring of the effects
Road rage

 

[Matt210]

For me, I believe the cause of my DP/DR, Depression, Anxiety etc is a general hatred for the world and the way it works. It's cliche but when I was young I had so many dreams, and I really believed the world was good. Now I feel like it was all lies... some major things that bother me:

1. Drugs and Alcohol- the fact that i'm slowly finding out that the majority of the world uses these two things. It's scary for me that there isn't true happiness in the world and that people are so bored that they use them in order to have fun. Unless you like the taste of alcohol and drink because of that, never to get drunk... then you are either escaping your problems, or have nothing better to do. How can the world be this consumed with boredom? The "fun" people have on these substances isn't even REAL! This one honestly crushes me... i'd have to say it affects me on a daily basis.

2.General Fakeness of People- Life is a popularity contest. Whether it be teenagers in high school, or people fighting for power in some company. People do what they can to get themselves ahead, they don't generally care about many other people. It's so easy for someone to just pretend they are your best friend, and it be a complete lie. On top of this, people act certain ways so people will like them.. no one is really themselves. No one says what they are really thinking, they say what is considered appropriate by our society.

3. The Lies- The fact that life is about going to high school so one can go to university so one can get a job and find money and happiness. This is completely unrealistic for the majority of society. I have worked my ass off to get to university and now I see it's utterly pointless. First of all, a University degree will land the majority of people NO WHERE, it's all just bullshit, and second of all... do I really want to work away four years at university so I can then work away two more at graduate school so i can then work 30 years of my life in a dead-end job so when im SIXTY and on my death bed i'll have money and "be happy".

We are fed "just get good marks in school and everything will be okay" our whole lives.. it doesn't work that way. Happiness is next to impossible in a capitalist society. Not to say that people don't find ways to be happy (heyy there's drugs and alcohol again... manufactured happiness... happiness in a bottle or a joint). But our society pushes happiness out of people.

No fucking wonder people end up with depression and anxiety and DP/DR.. we are born and fed delusions for our entire life.. and the majority of people who end up with depression are the ones that finally see through that into what this world is.

The worst part is, for most people the only cure is to go back to believing that.. to work their 9-5 monday to friday jobs and force themselves to be happy.. break open a bottle and get themselves as happy as possible as quick as possible on friday and saturdya nights.

I wish I could get away from this world.. I am always tempted to just pack a suitcase and leave.. go places i've never been .. enjoy life.. but when I say it to myself it feels every bit as delusional as this life here.. I can't really survive that way.... I really wish I could. Well now you've heard my rant on society... enjoy.

 

[dreamcatcher]

LIFE IN GENERAL AT THE MOMENT......EVERYTHING IS SO CONFUSING :?

 

[Guest]

Not fully being able to do, what it is that I really want to do.
People Who talk shit but can't back it up.
Not having a positive girlfriend at the moment
Kids from the suburbs who try very hard to act " ghetto" because they are easily influenced by the garbage that they see on tv.
Every male who wears Pink besides Cam'Ron
Females with no class
Bad music
People who mistake my kindness for weakness
fuckin DP/DR, Depression, anxiety, obsessiveness, etc etc
Life

i might add on more

 

[Guest]

so it sounds like an even mix of philosophy and needling obsessive nit picking...

matt I feel the same way about the drug and alcohol thing. Almost all of my friends are on anti-depressants and those who aren't either drink or smoke pot.

I'm not talking about clinically depressed people or DP'd people... they are depressed because something bad happened in their lives, and they go on antidepressants. Instead of looking at their lives and trying to sort out what's going on.

I'm NOT talking about people with serious psych. issues. I'm not anti-med if it's a serious situation. But it does bother me when people jump on anti-depressants to numb their feelings, when their lives take a turn for the worse.

I agree... it's like people don't want to experience life or really feel aything, so they either are on meds, booze, or dope.

 

[Misty]

Not being able to provide for my family
not being able to give my daughter everything
making b/c in classes instead of A's
having a husband who thinks that video games are more important
having no friends to hang out with on the weekends
basically having no life
having no job (although that's a givin)
having my daughter cry for her grandfather instead of me
having my little sister rub that she is better in my face
my parents never telling me how proud they are of me
my real father having my step sisters name tatooed on his back and not my name

I could go on....but you got the gist of it.

Things that make me happy:
being able to talk on this board about my problems
giving gifts
getting good grades
having people tell me I did a good job
hearing my daughter say "I love you mommy"
having my daughter home

 

[Guest]

Matt,
I wrote a thread about your post here under the Freudian Section forum. it's called "Old Battles, New Days"

Check it out.

Love,
J

 

[stickdude]

DP/DR - anxiety/depression
not having a job
not having a car
not being interesting
having little motivation
social anxiety / being shy around people
not being good at anything
not knowing what i want to do with my life
being quiet around people
dad complaining all the time
seeing my dad drunk
asthma acting up
cold showers
no food

 

[sleepingbeauty]

id love to make a HUMONGOUS list here. :lol:

but after seeing mistys post, i dont think i have too much to complain about. god misty.. it baffles me just how may arseholes there are around you. i just want to put my arms around you and show you that the world you know isnt the only world out there. that and i also want to carve MISTY into your fathers forehead with a dull blade. :evil:

 

[falling_free]

Lots of work that I am having trouble focusing on
Empty feeling
Lots of friends left for uni apart from about 2 freinds
General loniliness
Not feeling good about anything
social anxiety
ever increasing sprial of self hatred
Having no feeling/emotions
weird spaced out feelings, parts of body especially head seems expanded stretched or pressuried

 

[Misty]

Thanks SB, your post put a smile on my face. I'd like to do the dull knife thing too, but I can't force him to love me anymore. He's got his "new" daughter now. I just have to live with that.

But I am looking for the good in my life. I am trying and keeping myself busy with art projects and studing for my Psychology test. Things that I love to do. So as long as I just don't think about it, I'll be fine. But thank you again for your concern. That means a lot to me.

 

[Guest]

having a husband who thinks that video games are more important

They are.

Medication
Being single - and not interested in anyone i meet
Anxiety attacks
Visual Distortions
Failing College
Living far away from my good friends
Living in Poverty
Having no job
Distant family, emotionally and geographically

 

[Guest]

Benzo withdrawal

Not being able to leave the house or even my bed sometimes because of benzo withdrawal.

Not having been with a woman in a long time.

Celery

John Mayer and Good Charlotte

Fashion freaks

Emo kids

Spinach

 

[Guest]

Yeah, I forgot to put in scenesters. Fashion punks, fashion goths, emo, scream-o, all those idiots I want to burn alive. Next person I meet with a star tattoo on their arm is getting a knife in the face.

I'm going to the gunstore and right over to hot topic.

 

[Guest]

I believe that the emo kids contributed to the DP I have. When I realized that this culture is being overrun by emo kids with socks on their arms, tongue rings and purple hair, my brain just couldn't take the pain so it dissociated and brought me to this different world. Other things that contributed to me disconnecting from the world:

1.) the gap

2.) belly button piercings

3.) yellowcard and sum 41

4.) The New york yankees

5.) cheerleaders

....call me reserved or lame when it coems to the fashion thing, but I just dont get it. I am fine with a crappy pair of jeans and a cheap t-shirt. I have never shopped at abercrombie, tommy hilfigger or any of those other prep ass stores. I never intend to either.

 

[Misty]

Hey, I shop at the Gap but that's because their the only jeans that fit that don't fall apart on me. I have my belly button peirced. And I was in Pom in High School. Do you hate me I'm not a prep. Never was. I don't think I'm better than everybody else.

But what's up with the star tattoo? What does that mean?

 

[Guest]

5.) cheerleaders

I'm living with one...kill me now.

 

[Guest]

I guess the gap is okay. I would certainly choose the gap over abercrombie and bitch or american eagle. I see no point in buying a 60 dollar shirt. Really folks, are you going to gain that much more satisfaction from buying a $60 shirt? Are you going to wake up in the morning feeling fulfilled? I wake up every morning in my cheap $5 shirt from Kohls and I feel fine really. Maybe it is preventing me from getting laid, but with the money I saved on the shirt I can just buy a hooker anyways. You see, it all works out in the end.

I'm living with one...kill me now.

Do you get to watch her shower?

 

[Guest]

No, but I do get to have sex with her on a regular basis...well, once...and i don't want to talk about it :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: