I've felt that a lot of times too. I was always afraid I'd be creeping a guy out and worried he'd be picking up "gay vibes". Funny thing is, when you visibly get uncomfortable it makes other people uncomfortable, just not for the reason you're worried about. Unfortunately, that usually makes you feel validated in your false projection.Very interesting post. I had a similar phase with the whole gay thing. I knew for a fact I wasn't in any way gay and never have felt that way at all, but if I looked into my male friends' eyes for too long I'd automatically and inexplicably think "Crap, he's gonna find out I'm gay and attracted to him!" - even though I wasn't at all. It was like a stupid little voice talking over my own thoughts and replacing them with this nonsense.
Also similar to you is an obsession I've had about me being on the edge of becoming a serial killer. I look at people walking past and I'm bizarrely adamant that I was ridiculously close to battering them to death. That's made me paranoid that I do have this darker side in me and it scares me, it really does. Could I just snap like that? That's what I'm being told. I don't know. It's crazy. I don't get the gay one anymore but I'm always getting the murderous obsession feeling. Even today, I just felt this darkness in my eye sockets (difficult to explain but they feel deep and...evil?) that is almost trying to tease me into doing something horrific or at least thinking about it. I don't want to do it but it's making me think that I will!
I once heard a comedian named Maria Bamford, who had intrusive and disturbing sexual/violent thoughts since she was a child, say that the people obsessed and terrified of being violent were the least likely to be. She compared it to how a person who feels filthy and is obsessed with washing their hands 100 times a day is the least likely to be dirty.