[ConfusedBoy321]

So it was all fine until a year and a half ago it started. And its been going on since then. I have a feeling I'm not present in real life. I don't know where I am and who is next to me. I mean I can see them but it feels like my body is on planet earth in time and space, but my mind and my spirit is somewhere else, its not in my body its detached. I have no sense of feeling, I literally feel nothing, really sleepy and tired all the time. Nothing feels real since like I said my mind and spirit aren't in my body, I am not in the real world surrounded by real stuff. If I try really really hard I can merge my mind and spirit with my body and be normal, present in real life. But then I start to feel and the feeling are terrible. When I enter the real world my mind acts like theres no past. Like I'm starting my life from this moment on. Life goes on continuously and cant be stopped at any moment and that's the normal way of living it. I guess that I was living normal and then this happened and now my brain doesn't recognize this period. When I focus on becoming normal and eventually do my soul feels hurt, I don't know how to feel. Everything that someone says being good or bad hurts me. I have been to a clinic that deals with mental diseases and they did the laboratory tests and the psychology tests, I'm waiting for the results. I don't know what to do, I cant go on like this. Suicide is becoming more and more of an option since I feel no pleasure in anything. When I go normal I feel terrible and when I'm like this I feel nothing at all. Can someone give me some advice, I'm just 16, my friends are all out enjoying their lives, I'm the one that is considering suicide because of this. Its really hard to go on like this. I'm very scared and its just that when I concentrate really really hard and become normal, it feels like this, scared, depressed, suicidal. That's all...

 

[Nadosa]

Feeling exactly the same. Whilst many people enjoy their life to the fullest after DP, I keep dwelling about time and how it could already be October. Like wtf, soon it is Christmas then New Year and my mind is still stuck in February, just my physical body is present. It is terrifying...I dont know, cant give you any advice. For me it is really tough since my mind decided to throw hopelessness and suicidal thoughts at me, I just accept it and really hope my mind will miraculously adapt to time.

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

I am seeking help and really want to get medication for this. The main thing is that Im lost in time. Whilst I have this I dont have the sense of time and place, and it worried me a lot thst if I get cured that I woukd forget everything that happen in this period. But now I would happily accept forgeting everything rather than being lost. When I concetrate on everything around me and get in touch with my body I just dont know how to feel, people talking about something that happened a couple days ago just gives me this weird stabbing feeling so I eventually go back to DP state in a minute to not have suicidal thoughts and to not feel like I just got sent to planet Earth. I waited for my mind to adjust for a year, I thought it was over when it wasnt. I guess I ll be in my DP bubble till I get some meds, stops me for thinking about anything horrible.

 

[106473]

Keep in the fight bud, if you need to talk, i am all ears

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

Keep in the fight bud, if you need to talk, i am all ears

Appreciate the support buddy

 

[106473]

Honestly, anytime, don't be afraid at all, PM me anytime. (seriously)

 

[Nadosa]

I am seeking help and really want to get medication for this. The main thing is that Im lost in time. Whilst I have this I dont have the sense of time and place, and it worried me a lot thst if I get cured that I woukd forget everything that happen in this period. But now I would happily accept forgeting everything rather than being lost. When I concetrate on everything around me and get in touch with my body I just dont know how to feel, people talking about something that happened a couple days ago just gives me this weird stabbing feeling so I eventually go back to DP state in a minute to not have suicidal thoughts and to not feel like I just got sent to planet Earth. I waited for my mind to adjust for a year, I thought it was over when it wasnt. I guess I ll be in my DP bubble till I get some meds, stops me for thinking about anything horrible.

Man I feel exactly like you...

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

Man I feel exactly like you...

Im lost on what to do right now. I searched this forum for some story similar to mine and came up short. At least I know Im not entirely alone here.

 

[Nadosa]

I wish I could switch back into DP mode to stop thinking about this time thing, I feel very very lost in time.

 

[ThoughtOnFire]

Im lost on what to do right now. I searched this forum for some story similar to mine and came up short. At least I know Im not entirely alone here.

Yes it's true, you are not entirely alone. I thought I was alone with this when I first had it too. I thought maybe 1 or 2 people out there had what I have. Some of my main symptoms are 'feeling energies instead of physicality'... I also have hallucinations. When I found the forum and DP community I thought that everybody would be the same as me. I realized after the fact that some symptoms I have, others do not. But that didn't matter, cause I wasn't entirely alone anymore. I've found over my time here that everybody has their own unique experience. Some relate in one way, others in another. It seems that the basic core symptoms of dissociation are generally experienced.

If you are feeling suicidal at anytime, then you can reach out at anytime on the forum. Don't hesitate to PM me or anybody else who has offered to talk with you. I'm sure if you feel particularly relatable to any one member here, then most would be open to having a private conversation with you. You can also when in a crisis give the hotline a call: http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/54170-crisis-suicide-hotlines/

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

Yes it's true, you are not entirely alone. I thought I was alone with this when I first had it too. I thought maybe 1 or 2 people out there had what I have. Some of my main symptoms are 'feeling energies instead of physicality'... I also have hallucinations. When I found the forum and DP community I thought that everybody would be the same as me. I realized after the fact that some symptoms I have, others do not. But that didn't matter, cause I wasn't entirely alone anymore. I've found over my time here that everybody has their own unique experience. Some relate in one way, others in another. It seems that the basic core symptoms of dissociation are generally experienced.

If you are feeling suicidal at anytime, then you can reach out at anytime on the forum. Don't hesitate to PM me or anybody else who has offered to talk with you. I'm sure if you feel particularly relatable to any one member here, then most would be open to having a private conversation with you. You can also when in a crisis give the hotline a call: http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/54170-crisis-suicide-hotlines/

Thanks for the help, the main thing is that my life looks like a unnatached series of events, like one event happens thenanother but they are not attached to make it feel like normal. Im going to this clinic, had my blood tests, some kind of head scan and like a variety of psychological tests. Im going to a doctor that works in non typical medicine when I will get some kind of meds, going to consult the head therapist at the clinic about how to treat this from there forward,then a guy who works with peoples energies and auras and influences them positively, I had been going to him before for my stuttering and I always feel sleepy and like a strange feeling when Im with him, so theres that, also going to a priest and to round it all of my mom has this fortune teller that she sometimes visit, sounds crazy I know. But litterally everything that she said to my mom ended up being true and my mom visited her a few times, her dad dying, my problem with my chest, her work situation etc. Worth a shot to see what she tells now. All that in a course of a week, come next week I will decide how to approach this from there and see if Im getting better.

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

I wish I could switch back into DP mode to stop thinking about this time thing, I feel very very lost in time.

Are you taking any medication?

 

[Nadosa]

Stay active and tell us how you're doing then. No I am strictly against meds because they could bring my DR back which would be even worse. I know sometimes I want DP but sometimes I think it would be worse with it.

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

So I realized whats wrong with me, at one point my life froze, its like I stopped letting time go by and I dont know how I did it but I kinda froze my brain from going normal. I figured it out, I just have to stop resisting and just let my body be normal and run its course. I was unconciously stopping my body from being normal, I cant explain it. Its really weird. The only problem with this is I forget everything that happened in that span of a year and half and since I forget that I get my old personality back. In this year and a half, thanks to not feeling anything I have been really more socially normal and talkative. Since things didnt bother me at all, I didnt get mad or upset nor was I happy. My goal was to use this weird shitty period to be as socially normal as I can be. But since I got my personality back, its weird, Im less confident a lot and more quiet. I go to the clinic on monday so I will talk to them about this, lets call it amnesia, thing and how to deal with it, should I tell my friends, and stuff like that,. Positive thing is that Im no longer suicidal at all, negative is this shitty amnesia thing. How I plan this going is:

A- if they experienced similar cases like mine so that they can explain how I did this and explain my condition to me

B- tell my closest friends so that they can like fill in the blanks of that year and a half

Well. this shitty thing, dont know if DP or some other weird stuff brought literally nothing good with it. If theres anything I can talk away from it is that I guess I have a lot of more friends going forward since I was very talkative at the time. Thank you all for giving your replies, they meant a lot. Lets see how this goes, I just hope I dont go insane after this.

 

[Nadosa]

I am glad you are feeling better bud!

 

[rosepet]

I feel suicidal, too. Totally lost in time, too. too, too, too!

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

I am glad you are feeling better bud!

Thank you buddy, I hope that you will feel better too. Fun story, I gone to this doctor that has like this alternative medicine and he kinda held my head and used his fingers on my neck, forehead and stuff. He immediately said that my thoughts wander off and that I had lost control over that. He said its common for people who meditate and Im going again there tomorrow.That guy was a soldier who died for a couple of minutes and came back. When that happened he retired from the military and got wayyy more religious. I mean he assumed what was happening to me without me telling him and got it like 80 percent right so I ll give it a try. Still think tjhat I overcame this but like I said everytime I go normal,I forget everything which is a problem.

 

[ConfusedBoy321]

I feel suicidal, too. Totally lost in time, too. too, too, too!

Can you explain your particular case?

 

[Nadosa]

Please keep in touch with us

 

[Thisisnotlife]

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