What Cured You? (Advice for Beginners)

3860 Views 80 Replies 10 Participants Last post by Diamondarmorboy, 23 d ago

Tres

Discussion Starter · 5 mo ago

Hello,

I wanted to see if maybe some people who have lessened or cured their depersonalization/derealization disorder could write their short list of what helps and what didn't help so that people who are looking for answers could avoid the lengthy conversations, arguments, and so on and instead just get good solid advice.

I appreciate you all and hope you all reach repersonalization soon!

1 - 19 of 81 Posts

coolwhip27

· #2 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

Not seeking a cure, as if its something outside myself. I am my suffering and I am my good feeling. Yeah depersonalization is very real, no I’m not saying all you have to do is stop thinking about it. But people are interested in this, treating it like a study, thinking they’ll discover something they haven’t yet. Good feeling won’t come into fruition that way. The “cure” is literally within you, as cliche as it sounds. But you want something permanent, rock solid, which may look like a perfect explanation. That’s a never ending search and you’ll only be satisfied with an answer until you decide you are, so if your intelligent you’ll throw all that away. People have looked everywhere outward for solutions, from medications to dietary research, to studying other peoples methods. A waste of time no doubt. As far as im concerned, fuck this forum and all its useless debates. There’s no real debate, if you have depersonalization you need your own insight. What are you trying to solve? Problems are to be solved, but what do you do when YOU are the problem? Go on, find out. Or else just keep on the same direction which is the same thing keeping you insane.

I’m on this forum to try help, so before some ass tries to point a finger at me and call me a hypocrite because I’m on this forum, they can read and weep.

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Reactions: 1

coolwhip27

· #4 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

So for clarification, for you, the answer that cured or lessened your dpd/drd is to accept it that it is happening and reframe it?

No, there’s no answer. See look, you want to put it in a box. That’s apart of the disorder. Your desire to frame some kind of an answer, reducing it to a description like “acceptance”. You can’t actually reduce it to being anything, when you’re feeling good you’ll find it wasn’t because of any explanation or method that you committed to

coolwhip27

· #8 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello NoDevils,

Okay, I see. CoolWhip27 is this a theory you've come up with or is there some sort of literature you've read this in? I'm only asking because from what i've understood acceptance and the solution of any mental health disorder have always been separate but both important for recovery.

A theory? I didn’t say there wasn’t a solution but does the solution identify as an answer? Logically it can’t, it must be bigger than an idea. I’m talking about the direction your mind is taking, which is you. Yes you can cure yourself but not through a methodology that you attempt to follow, then you’re still seeking something beyond yourself. Ok, look, there’s a good state and a bad state. If as you are in this bad state you are looking for a way out of it then naturally what do you do? This bad state is perpetuated by all the resistance to it, the seeking an answer etc. So if you actually saw that the direction you’re taking and the problem are one then why wouldn’t all effort cease? It would be automatic, instant, your mind sees the disorder that it’s been perpetuating and naturally comes to a stop

coolwhip27

· #10 · 5 mo ago

NoDevils said:
Coolwhips's advice, however he arrived at his conclusion, is the best because it's the most realistic and current.

From years of suffering and having enough of my own shit. I’m 24 years old but I feel like I’ve gone through hell and back about 8 thousand times. I know how bad this shit can get.

Reactions: 1

coolwhip27

· #12 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello,

Yeah, a solution is synonymous with the answer in the case of the question i'm posing.

And yes, i'm assuming your response was a theory. Or really more of a hypothesis since it's untested (unless you've seen a research paper involving the concept of acceptance in depersonalization). It's an interesting hypothesis conceptually, I just don't see a way to prove it or how it explains a causal mechanism.

I appreciate your input sincerely. Personally I am on the other end of the spectrum looking at dpd/drd as a mostly biological. However I also believe in "whatever works".

Heard and understood. If it’s conceptual understandings you’re after, then I’m afraid we can’t go any further. Because what I’m trying to get across is not a concept. I wish you the best of luck

coolwhip27

· #14 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

I am just looking for beneficial fact-based treatment approaches (regardless of methodology) presented in a clear and concise format that "veteran" users can impart onto "beginners".
What you presented is a concept. I wasn't really looking for concepts or "conceptual understandings" as you put it but I greatly appreciate your perspective and willingness to share.
I tend to shy away from the spiritual, philosophical, and conceptual myself because I am all about cold hard, peer-reviewed facts from reputable sources however I know some people don't respond to that for various reasons.
Anyways, I too wish you the best man and hope that your advice helps someone out there.

So you’re really gonna try to assert over me, that what I personally know as a fact is conceptual? The whole point I make revolves around NOT being able to put the “cure” into a box, otherwise it becomes merely a concept. This is what you and most others here try do. Like I said, good LUCK with that.

I wonder if you are aware that anything thought puts together is a concept. You won’t be able to puncture the core of suffering with any idea, because thought will always be limited. See the fact of that, don’t interpret it according to your various beliefs you’ve accumulated. And don’t compare me as I say it, as if this is my idea I’ve thought of.

coolwhip27

· #16 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

NoDevils said:
Rationale or "concepts" are critically important. Without it we're just wandering through the dark. Ability to articulate concepts is also important. If some user of this forum has a genuine cure to depersonalization which doesn't fit under the categories of wellness advice, philosophy, or resolving some health problem the depersonalization is secondary to then they're the first in history and should maybe go get a patent.

Insisting on packaging the concept of acceptance in Zen buddhism is kind of silly but it's one of the better things happening on this forum.

You can tell the veterans from the noobs by how much they obsess over symptoms and try to manifest a pharmacological solution through sheer frustration. Some people after decades of this syndrome are still noobs.

You can fit just about anything into a category. Technically everything we’re saying can be viewed as conceptual, but what I’m saying is there’s a difference between interpreting an idea (concept) and looking at an actuality (fact). If you’re seeing actuality then it doesn’t need to be analyzed and tested, you know it because it’s a fact. Thought is the enemy in depersonalization, it creates constant strain and effort to try overcome. The same mechanical condition which “Zen Buddhists” speak out against is the reason people have DP. DP is just a symptom of the broken human condition except exaggerated to the point of detachment, but it’s the same thing. It may also happen to be that people who come here are simply just more obsessed than others who suffer from the same thing, which is also a byproduct of all this

Reactions: 1

coolwhip27

· #20 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

An "actuality" should be able to be analyzed and tested to confirm it's a fact. That's the scientific method. Otherwise it's just speculation; a hypothesis. Thesis meaning "a statement or theory that is put forward as a premise to be maintained or proved" and hypo meaning "below or less than". In the case of "hypothesis" it means a statement that is made that has yet to be proven through scientific method.

Well, you’ve mixed up and diluted what I wanted to share with all sorts of definitions. The scientific method has nothing to do with it, if analysis is involved then you’d be analyzing yourself which would be absurd. Intangible philosophical knot is what you’ve made it out to be. That’s because we aren’t meeting together as we talk about this, so I’d prefer we both leave it alone for now.

coolwhip27

· #23 · 5 mo ago

NoDevils said:
Acceptance is a legitimate and empirically testable method of dealing with psychic misery. There are some problems of subjectivity such as the placebo effect but that's true of all studies which measure their success based on self-reported levels of misery. Acceptance shouldn't be a difficult or nebulous concept. I think that's just the direction your conversation is going.

And it can really only be realized in the realm of personal experience. I’m not sure what Tres has put together about what I said at all, besides him thinking I’m putting forth an “abstract concept”. Acceptance means everything you’ve been doing that makes you miserable coming to a complete stop. It’s only logical that chronic depersonalization is a result of chronic effort to escape “what is”. Acceptance of what is is not dependent on any circumstance, there is only peace with now. None of what I’m saying is even original, tres probably doesn’t even know that. He’s looking at what I’m saying and going “what?” and calling it abstract. Lol

But I express importance on not following any method. Because like you said, acceptance isn’t intentional “effort” to achieve

coolwhip27

· #25 · 5 mo ago

NoDevils said:
I agree with Tres that acceptance is a non-treatment. Psychotherapeutic, nutritional, or even medical intervention might be necessary in many depersonalized people. These interventions should be undertaken to promote wellness rather than cure depersonalization. Depersonalization itself is pretty much harmless except for the inattentiveness that usually accompanies it. Depersonalization has also been linked to more severe presentations of mental illness, and suicide, though I don't believe depersonalization in itself warrants low quality of life or suicide.

It is a non treatment, because nobody can help you with it. But I’m of the opinion that when it comes to DP, any “treatment” is futile. I’m sure not every case of depersonalization is exactly the same, some may actually need guidance but for those who experience chronic stress as a result of themselves and experience DP then theyre going to have to help themselves.

coolwhip27

· #27 · 5 mo ago

NoDevils said:
I don't take a black/white position on this. I agree we can't force people into acceptance but we can promote and facilitate it. And we shouldn't completely forget the people who have mental illness because their lives are dire or the people who have depersonalization as a result of a physical health problem. Like you suggested before, depersonalization in this case can be an indicator that some change is needed.

Promote and facilitate is what I do. But there’s no going inside someone else’s mind and helping them, “acceptance” is completely on the individual. There’s no manual book given to anyone on how to operate themselves. Perhaps simple truths like that help embellish footprints for an individual to start learning more about themselves and the nature of suffering.

coolwhip27

· #30 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

The idea of "acceptance" isn't some incomprehensible thing that I just can't get my mind around. I understand what you are saying. I am saying that 1. "Acceptance" in dpd/drd is certainly both a hypothesis and a concept 2. You can promote your concept without the compulsion to attack another 3. The concepts you are attacking seem to be working based on how many people are coming back saying meds, therapy, nutrition, exercise, blah blah blah worked for them. 4. At no point did I ever accept that godforsaken disorder and I still rid myself if it. Not to knock your point but rather to show you that your hypothesis isn't applicable to everyone. So....my point being i'm glad that acceptance worked for you but like....just say "Acceptance worked for me" and move on without attacking other perspectives. My post that was meant to help beginners with quick meaningful information and solutions is now just another argument over semantics and abstractions.

If you think what I meant is accepting DP itself, then no, you don’t understand at all. No human on this earth would be able to live peacefully without acceptance whether you’re aware of what I mean by that or not. I’m not going to cow toe to you, we disagree, so what. You should have just dropped it like I suggested earlier. You asserted the scientific method as the absolute, relentlessly insisting that what I’m saying is a hypothesis/abstract concept because that’s how you’re making sense of it. We aren’t meeting. Cool, thanks for the criticism, now can we please just move on with our lives? I voted that we stopped talking long ago, but here we are, I’m to blame apparently.

coolwhip27

· #32 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

Your responses are increasingly nonsensical and chronically abstract. I'm not relentlessly insisting anything; I am educating you about the definition of "hypothesis" which you don't seem to understand. Words have meanings and you don't seem to have a firm understanding of those meanings. Reading your responses has been like deciphering what a kid was trying to spell out of magnets on a fridge. Addtionally it's not "how im making sense out of it", it's the term to call what you are saying and again I don't understand why you're hyper-fixated on believing your idea transcends description. You're welcome for the critique and education about your perspective and the criticism about your ego. You can move on with your life whenever you choose to. You certainly are to blame for the continuance of this conversation. I'm not just going to sit here listening to you de-rail my post with your psuedo-philosophical russel brand-esque word vomit whilst criticizing other solutions and not call you out on it.

I get that you don't appreciate the people on this site who think the way I do. That's okay. Not everyone thinks the same. But you are being insufferable in your responses, acting like you are god's gift to earth. And with as much ego too. You and your hypothesis are not any better than my theories nor anyone else's.

Learn to just answer a simple question with a simple answer. Jesus Christ.

Please do care to tell me what exactly it is that’s so nonsensical and abstract, as I haven’t heard one real ounce of “critique” coming from you towards me. I’ve heard you describe what I say with certain words, like hypothesis, abstract, and now something that a kid spells out on a fridge. All of these are great jabs on the surface, but none of them actually address anything I’ve written down here. Talking about my “ego” won’t progress the conversation but it wont make me mad either. Accusing me of being illiterate is pretty convenient too huh, does it feel like a win-win? So far you’ve done nothing but assert dominance over all my propositions while somehow maintaining your own innocence. Go ahead, continue nagging at me then Grandma. If bitching helps you feel better then maybe you’ll find your own form of acceptance that way.

coolwhip27

· #35 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

See? It's like talking to a wall. I've told you exactly what was so abstract and nonsensical but you didn't pay attention. Now you're asking me to repeat myself. Re-read if you wanna know.
And you're right, talking about your ego won't progress the situation because you don't seem like the type that cares to do any self-evaluation. My goal isn't to make you mad, it's to correct you. And as far as me "accusing" you of being illiterate......if you knew that the definition of illiterate meant "unable to read or write" then you'd know that I wasn't saying you were illiterate but rather that you're typing words without knowing how to properly use them. Literally proving my point.

You’re a wall. No, as a matter of fact you haven’t addressed any point I’ve made in context to your original naive question. I’ve been reading your stupid ass responses and replying to them unfortunately. Can’t you see where our conversation is going? Nowhere. You wana keep this shit up? Fine, keep replying sweetheart. Lets see who has the better insults because that’s what you’ve turned this into. You’re allowed to be stupid, but now you’re abusing the privilege. And like I said, if you keep on bitching at me you MIGHT find your own form of acceptance that way GRANDMA

coolwhip27

· #37 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

It takes two to have a conversation. I've been linear in my responses and clear in my criticism. You've just been argumentative, egocentric, patronizing, and wrong. At each step rather than addressing my clear criticisms you've just escalated your targeted and wordy responses. Again, my goal is not to insult you but rather to correct you. And I don't need acceptance because I already fixed my dpd/drd using logic and reasoning.

Uh, your last 5 responses have been the epitome of “no u”. “I’m right ur wrong”. So, if you think that’s logic and reasoning then you’re just a child. You also couldn’t provide any evidence of correcting me on anything that had to do with your original question, because you never did. You’ve articulated nothing but small little attacks on my verbatim. You’re certainly not worth my time. I hope you finally find peace after your next response of “I’m right and you’re wrong”. Lmfao

coolwhip27

· #40 · 5 mo ago

Trith said:
This is totally incredible........ it makes me think of this scene.

LOL

coolwhip27

· #42 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

Again, my post was meant to be answered by a simple response to help others. Your long-winded non-answers just show that you are not committed to the cause and are, in fact, a barrier to people getting help on this site.

I regularly help people who suffer with dpd/drd to recover with real, tangible methodology (including myself) whilst you continue to parrot a zen philosophy.

I sincerely hope that someday soon you lose the "I know everything" complex and open a book. Hey, you can even kill two birds with one stone and figure out how to use the english language correctly. I am just so tired of you wanna-be philosophers sounding as obtuse as Jordan Peterson with as many wordy sentences as a Russel Brand podcast trying to present yourself like a monk.

I accept your answer. "Acceptance". Okay, cool. The rest is you trying to prove you're my intellectual equal, which you clearly are not. I bet you'd shit yourself if I even started mentioning cited sources or anything tangible to back up anything you've said on this post.

Go home. I have nothing else for you here besides corrections. And clearly, you do not take criticism well. Hey, I guess Peter is right, we're made for each other. You= Me=.

So, “blah blah I am your intellectual superior blah blah”? Both of us know that egotistic talk means nothing, but I don’t expect anything more from you because that’s what this conversation has been. Obviously we ARENT made for eachother, which is why I suggested we stop earlier. It’s not one-sided buddy, you’ve been just as involved in the bullshit talk as I have. At least I’m wise enough to admit what this really is. I am home, and im not going anywhere. With all those cited sources and stack of knowledge you claim to have in the chamber, you fired none of it. I bet that hurts. Since you’re so out to hurt me, if you did have anything that would make me “shit my pants”, you’d gladly explain this oracular view. But you’re all talk. A big waste of my time. Keep shooting blanks at me buddy, I’ll still be here.

Personally I think you should go home. You’ve gotten outwitted every time as I’ve ran circles around your sluggish mind.

coolwhip27

· #44 · 5 mo ago

Tres said:
Hello CoolWhip27,

There is just 0 chance of me taking the time and effort to compile that for you. Correcting you and messing with you is something im happy to do. Wasting time offering you the answer that you aren't going to accept is a whole different thing. We're already at this point in this conversation. Do you honestly think I believe that you're capable of being convinced with facts?

Anyways, while it was fun i'm actually getting bored now because the novelty has worn off. When you come to your senses just go back to my other post and you can have the cure for free. I'd recommend screenshots for a rainy day.

And I still like to think we are meant for each other. You're like the ignorant self-obsessed yin to my fact-based yang 😎😎☯ Or maybe you're actually me but in like another universe where I wasn't properly educated. Who knows?

Anyways, depersonalization/derealization has a cure. I know because not only did it work for me but it also works for my clients all the time. I know because I took the time to educate myself with actual books and journal articles. I know because once you understand what's happening it's so obvious. Keep spreading your rhetoric that's as scientific as "you can fix schizophrenia by accepting your hallucinations" and I'll keep spreading the facts based on simplistic biological understanding.

I swear to God it's like, no wonder so many people have this disorder for multiple decades. You can fix dissociative disorders but you can't fix ignorance.

P.S. Remember to screenshot the answer!

What a lovely little story. I’m sorry I only read half of it, but I’m glad you’ve finally admit defeat. That’s right, there’s zero chance of you expressing something you haven’t thought of, and another zero chance of you dissecting what you can’t comprehend. You’ve clearly shown that with your bitter non-compliance to even acknowledge what I know is a cure. Goodbye my little cupcake, goodnight sleep tight

coolwhip27

· #49 · 5 mo ago (Edited)

Mods, delete this piece of shit thread. Or just delete our petty little fight. It doesn’t deserve to be on this site meant to help people

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