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Told this story many times but ill shorten it. Im 18 at this time ive had dpdr for about 4-5ish years and ill be honest its sucked in the beginning and then i kinda figured out how to deal with it but then ive hit rock bottom.

Heres my timeline

First time experiencing dpdr

- Smoking weeds with friends and all good then i get this wave off not knowing who i am where i am, felt like dream or video game

-Wake up next morning everything is fine

2nd but most important

-One day i woke up and felt like a different person and didnt feel normal i did have a concussion during this time from soccer so my mom was like oh its your concussion.

-next day got to chillis and have worst fucking panic attack and throw up in the restaurant.

- went to er they said i had concussion

week later

- we have finished moving and my parents are separated after long fights (this took months until divorce papers went through)

- im in a new house like a mile or 2 away and im going into highschool.

week later

-everything feel like blur and im having panic attacks

- 2 months later

- doctor clears me of concussion but symptoms are still there and im getting scared because i believed that these symptoms were from concussion.

week later

- have panic attack go to er they say oh its anxiety

year later

-im on paxil ive told doctor about feeelings im seeing counselor but they seem like they dont believe me about these feelings

-oh i had a job btw at supermarket and was kinda just riding the feelings out

year later

-im on new meds and adhd meds and i dont like how any of it feels at first but i get used to it

2 months

-i kinda am just livin at this point i may or may have not quit job due to dad having heart attack(hes fine now)

year later

- its 11th grade and i am on celexa and im devloping bad habits i was so depressed and didnt ive a fuck about anyone/anything i would just not go to school or go to school and walk out first period.

-few months go by they figure out that im failing and have not been to a full day of school in a year and tell me i cant pass 11th grade and i have options either to do summer school or to get ged.

so i got ged

month later

- completed 2 ged test and i have a job at restaurant im driving myself to and from work and holding job im able to go out and eat and have fun but am still aware of my "limits"

4 months later

- i quit im stressed oout mom is bugging me to get 2 jobs and doesnt understand what im feeling

- i focus on just passing this stupid test so i have a diploma

5 months

-ive passed ged and im doing fine i have girlfriend but im not going out infact im kinda just staying inside and scared of going out.

-month or 2 later 2018(april)

-we break up my first break up and i hadle it okay not the best

month goes by off me just crying and feeling sad and not leaving house

-present

-im not going as far as walking out front door i cancel ever doctors appointment

- me and my mom fights and she threatens to get people to come and bring me to er to evaulate me

-i feel like shit im on 20mg celexa and feel like shit and i dont know what to do

-i have no income my life fucking sucks dont know why im alive tbh

-all i do it make music and play video games

-i have friends come over somethimes but i never go to there houses

-my relationship with my dad is he comes up from his houose and says hi to me we used to get food when i could get out but know he just brings me food

-please someone help i cant go to doctors because it 40 minutes away and i have 5 pills left and im gonna withdrawl from them and im so confused and pissed

thanks for reading

-joe
 

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Hi, I got dp/dr around the same way you did. Woke up and everything was fine but for it to only pop up randomly and have random panic attacks. Don't give up man. You have your whole life ahead of you. According to you you feel like you've hit rock bottom. but once you come out of that you'll be glad you did because you'll be able to have a story of how your life went to shit but u came back up and didn't let it stop you. Everything happens for a reason. I know you will get better and you'll be successful one day. About your withdraw idk what to say just drink alot of water and have someone who you care about on ft or just on the call with you. Idk if what I told u will help u but i hope it did. sorry for what you going there but im sure your situatiuon will get better eventually

btw since money seems to be a problem i would look into amazon fba it takes alot of work to set up and a good amount of money but from what ive heard you can make alot of money off of it.

good luck
 
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