Depersonalization Support Forum banner
1 - 20 of 34 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
As per usual, as soon as one of my problems starts to go away, a fresh one emerges.

I thought I was over the worst. My DP was fluctuating between bearable levels and total absence, anxiety had disappeared, depression was going away. And now this. Anyway, I'll get it checked out in good time, I just thought I'd paste what I posted in a vision board here in case someone had any idea what was going on. I don't expect any people to be able to relate, but I thought it was worth a try. Anyway, here's my description:

I have no idea what this problem could be, so any help or advice would be greatly appreciated. It's hard for me to describe, so forgive any lack of clarity in what follows.

The basic symptom occurs in my peripheral vision. The best way to describe it is a "strobe light" kind of effect, with what I see in the periphery seeming to "flicker" in a fairly indescribable way. For example, I could be reading a book, and see the words fine, but the periphery around what I'm seeing appears to somehow seem "weird" as if it were a strobe - thought this description doesn't quite convey what it's like.

I first noticed this about a week ago, whilst looking at my computer screen. But it's only got noticeably bad in the last couple of days. It's worse when I'm looking at something still; when I'm moving around and my eyes are moving it's not all that noticeable.

I'm not on any medication, and I don't have many other symptoms, besides floaters. In terms of vision, I only have a light astigmatism. I don't know if that's related.

Any help as to what this might be would be greatly appreciated. I really hope there's nothing too serious wrong.

MonkeyDust
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
208 Posts
I get what you have described when i get migraines-which is usually caused by my sinus congestion. Eye strain causes it too i think.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I thought of migraines, however I've had this pretty much non-stop at least for the last couple of days. And I haven't had any other migraine symptoms really.

Since I've had floaters as well, it's possibly more likley to be something ocular related.

I'll probably get it checked out in the week.
 
G

·
As per usual, as soon as one of my problems starts to go away, a fresh one emerges.
that is my 'informal diagnosis'

And remember, we all KNOW this. We do. We just forget, or pretend we don't know, when we say "oh, no...I have some new symptom/experience. Wonder what this is?"

It's the same fears wearing new clothes. Period.

Peace,
Janine
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
No, not this time.

This is definitely either neurological or ocular; it simply cannot be a psychological symptom.

I feel fine, it's just as if someone's gone and put a strobe light in my peripheral vision - and it's got worse in the last couple of days.

I'm seeing the Doc tomorrow, hopefully.
 
G

·
hi new here, just wanted to say that my spose described the exact same problem with his vision. he says he gets it during severely stressful situations. almost positive it's pychological, he was sure it was due to a head injury, but he got checked and everything came out fine. so the conclusion, most-likely part of the dp.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Again, I beg to differ since:

A)It's non-stop
B)I'm under no stress right now
C)My DP's practically gone
D)As has the anxiety.

I guess I'll have to see the Doc to be sure. I'd be surprised if this one was psychological, but who knows.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
95 Posts
Hello, I'm new here, been suffering with DR 24/7 for about 2 years, since I smoked some weed at a party and got really stoned and freaked out.

Anyway, I've had some really weird visual problems since it came on, trees seem to be 2D, bees buzzing about 2 meters away from me seem to be right in my face, and one of the things I'm pretty sure doesn't help is looking at a computer screen / TV screen for too long. For a long time, I was having very jerky vision when I woke up, and still I have very blurry vision for about 2 hrs after I wake every day. Other than that, my vision seems sharp as it used to be before the DR kicked in, it's just got that horrible dark dreamy look to it.

The basic symptom occurs in my peripheral vision. The best way to describe it is a "strobe light" kind of effect, with what I see in the periphery seeming to "flicker" in a fairly indescribable way. For example, I could be reading a book, and see the words fine, but the periphery around what I'm seeing appears to somehow seem "weird" as if it were a strobe - thought this description doesn't quite convey what it's like.
Well, I think I know what you are talking about, it's one of the things I get when looking at a screen full of text on my laptop. The text I focus on (as long as it's not white on black - that contrast has a really bad effect on my vision) is fine, but around it, it's got maybe a slight flicker, it's a bit blurry, that sort of thing.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Well, I think I know what you are talking about, it's one of the things I get when looking at a screen full of text on my laptop. The text I focus on (as long as it's not white on black - that contrast has a really bad effect on my vision) is fine, but around it, it's got maybe a slight flicker, it's a bit blurry, that sort of thing.
Nah...that's not really it. It's more like I have a strobe all around my peripheral vision; it's hard not to get distracted doing any kind of reading.

Sorry if I'm a little bitter here, I am grateful for all the responses, and I shouldn't expect many people here to know what's up here. I'm just currently very angry seeing as I was "past the worst" - psychologically speaking - and am now facing something entirely different that is probably either neurological or ocular in origin. I'm hoping I don't go blind or get a brain tumour. But, hey, that would be just my luck.

I haven't slept tonight, but I've got an appointment with the Doc today in any case. I'll keep you posted on what he says.
 
G

·
To get this correctly checked you will need to see an eye specialist so he/she can have a look see behind the retina.

If you had of said that it only happnes in the dark or darkened enviroments I would have suggested the minor possibility of a PVD (posterior vitreous detachement).
This would usually occur with a mass of new floaters(like an explosion of them)and only in one eye.
I doubt very much if this is the cause with your eye problem.
Having said that it's not completely within the realm of impossibility ,I've had one in each eye.

See a specialist to put your mind at rest.I'm sure there is nothing to be concerned about.

Best Shelly
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
299 Posts
Monkeydust,

I suffer from migraines, and I also get the lights that everyone is talking about. However, I also get the lights without migraines - and have been experiencing those for years and years (10+ - I'm 24 now). The lights typically are the result of pressure being made upon the ocular nerves - I get it sometimes even when I have sinus pressure. Sometimes it hits me under periods of high stress, or periods where I do not get enough sleep. Often it is the case that others experience this and just don't make as big a deal out of it than us - as I did, too, worry a lot about brain tumors and the like for the longest time.

It's highly unlikely that it's a brain tumor as you would be experiencing other effects if it were - likely dizziness (very, very severe dizziness), fainting, nausea, inability to speak properly or slurred speach, severe headaches, COMPLETE loss of peripheral vision, inability to maintain a steady focus on moving objects, and a host of other things that would bother you much more than the flickering lights.

If it is constant and bothersome, then its best to see a doctor and not ruminate - if it goes away and you feel no other effects, then I would just chock it up to you being biological and the victim of chemistry.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Yeah, thinking about it now, a brain tumour seems an unlikely possibility.

Likewise, it doesn't seem to be something wrong with the eyes - it's in both of them, the vision's fine generally, I haven't had masses of floaters and I'm too young (18 ) to make most of the problems involving the retina very likely.

I suppose that leaves me with something migraine-esque; though I doubt it's that simple. I'm literally having trouble reading and watching TV now because of the distraction.

I'll be at the Doctor's in an hour and I swear I'll shout my head off if they try to just send me away. I think I'll need a referral to a neurologist and/or opthalmogist pronto.

Oh well....I wouldv'e thought that having had a whole catalogue of physical and mental illnesses over the last few years - with barely a month symptom free of something in-betweeen - it would be about time for my luck to change. I'll think twice before getting optimistic next time.

I'll see what the Doc says, anyways.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,496 Posts
Dear Monkeydust,

I'd go to an ophthalmologist, M.D., not optometrist ... always like to clarify this. 8)

You can never be too cautious about your eyes.

When I was 24, apparently because I am so nearsighted, I had retinal detachments in both eyes.

I had subtle symptoms for several years before the need for surgery in both eyes back in 1984.

The initial symptoms were missed/ignored by an eye doctor as "stress related".

I saw swirling pinwheeels, now and again in the periphery of my vision. As well as flashes of light which came and went -- very briefly. This literally went on for about 4 years. The stupid eye doctor never used the proper instrument to look in my eye.

I had a retinal tear in my left eye that required a sceral buckle (it's still there after all these years!), and cryosurgery and laser surgery in both eyes.

My retinas were slowly detaching and one day it was the Fourth of July at work. I couldn't see a damned thing for the light show. I was at work and as I frantically called my shrink to describe this, which he said was "stress" a great co-worker said, "Hang up the phone! Call Dr. Macy! My sister had the same thing!"

Thank God for this guy as I could have gone blind in my left eye.

I haven't had a problem since.

Lesson number 1, yes, we can have all sorts of odd symptoms, but for peace of mind have odd symptoms checked out.

I believed my therapists for several years. More than one (I had another light show during uni which came on after an illness) "stress."

The doctor who did all the surgery, including laser was a retinal specialist. I was lucky, this was at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles. These dudes had me in surgery pronto.

Not trying to scare you. You should go to an ophthalmologist and ask him/her to look at your retinas.

That may not be the problem, but this was my experience back in 1984.

My eyes have been fine since the surgery and other treatments. I'm now 46.

Best,
D 8)
Not trying to scare you, and this may not be the problem. Have a complete eye exam, not at an eyeglass place, but with an eye doctor.

Again, I can't diagnose this, but for peace of mind.......
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,496 Posts
Shelly said:
To get this correctly checked you will need to see an eye specialist so he/she can have a look see behind the retina.

If you had of said that it only happnes in the dark or darkened enviroments I would have suggested the minor possibility of a PVD (posterior vitreous detachement).
This would usually occur with a mass of new floaters(like an explosion of them)and only in one eye.
I doubt very much if this is the cause of your eye problem.
Having said that it's not completely within the realm of impossibility ,I've had one in each eye.

See a specialist to put your mind at rest.I'm sure there is nothing to be concerned about.

Best Shelly
What Shelly said, LOL. Sorry, missed this. :shock:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,496 Posts
One last thing, LOL.

Since 1984, as with all medical fields, ophthalmology has evolved so much, there are subspecialists for every part of your eye. This dude who finally did the surgery had about 4? years training in retinas and years o f experience after that, PAST all the normal ophthalmology training.

If you go to a good doctor, and have all of the right tests, they can figure things out. Of all things, I recently went to the eye doctor (I go every year). I have "retinal pigment hyperplasia" in both eyes. He said this can sometimes be a symptom of colon polyps! The eyes can be an excellent diagnostic tool. He said, this is NOT something to worry about, but I should tell my GP next time I see him.

OIY if I have to have something else! Agreed, as little Roseanna Roseannadanna said, "EEEEES always SOMEthing" 8)

I also have one floater in my right eye which is the size of Maui. I've said this before.

I'm sorry, I was so angry with two shrinks and of course the initial eye doctor who missed this.

I have to say, I get totally PISSED at some psychiatrists who easily dismiss certain symptoms as "hysterical", etc.

OK, end of rant.

And Monkeydust, this doesn't have to be something serious.

PS, did I say I HATE MOVING, but I LOVE the new executive paper shredder I got. I shredded all day yesterday. I have about a ton of paper shredded into confetti. Feels good. I'm traveling light! Slowly getting there.

Sorry for ranting.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Thanks Dreamer, I probably will try and get it checked by an opthalmologist.

I went to my Doctor today who just basically said "migraine..."

I was like "err...migraine?!?! For four days straight?!?! With no actual migraine symptoms besides what might be considered an "aura" which would only occur for about 20-30 mins before other symptoms in normal circumstances anyway?!?"

I got told to try some pills. Needless to say, they didn't do anything. I'm convinced on my medical record they've got "hypochondriac" written down somewhere; either that or I just get unlucky with doctors.

I'll try and get referred to a specialist, or just pay for it privately. I doubt it's a retinal detachement, seeing as I'm only 18, it's in both eyes, my eyesight's otherwise fine, no pain etc - but I guess it's best to be sure.

Thing is, if it's not that, then I have absolutely no idea what it could be.

Oh well, I hope diagnosing this won't be as hard as diagnosing DP was. It would be nice to be illness free for perhaps a little while.

EDIT...In case anyone hasn't quite grasped what I'm getting at here: imagine being in a club with the strobe lights on full blast. Now imagine leaving the place, to find that your vision's still got strobe lights all around it - the only exception being when you look directly in the centre of your fielf of view.

Well...that's what I've got right now. And, even though I am the undisputed master of "symptom searching", I haven't found anything to properly match my description so far.

At the moment I'm trying to distract myself enough not to start panicking, but it ain't easy.

For those of you with just DP, imagine having DP plus strobe-light vision. Count yourselves lucky lol.

But it could be worse, even for me, I guess.

MonkeyD
 
G

·
I still feel sure it's anxiety based, but IF it's an occular migraine, try this: take three extra-strength aspirin and drink a cup of strong black coffee. (I do realize you don't have a headache, but the aspirin is for another purpose).
I know that sounds like some witch's brew, lol...but it will REALLY make a difference in the visual disturbances if it's occular migraine related.

All the best,
Janine
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #18 ·
I'd like to think it's anxiety-based, but it came on at a time when my anxiety was at an all-time low - and it's not a symptom I've seen given for or related to anxiety.

I didn't have any aspirin to hand to try your "witch's brew" lol; but I did have some pills designed specifically for migraine, which apparently reduce all the symptoms of it. They didn't do anything for me. I hope that doesn't mean there's something seriously wrong.

With a bit of luck this won't be any worse tomorrow morning. If it is, I don't know what I'll do. I guess all I can do is "plod on" until it either goes away or I find out what the actual problem is.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #19 ·
Eeekk...

Now I've got dizziness as well. Not just "anxiety dizziness"; actualdizziness.

I'm going back to the Doctor's again to get a referral to the neurologist. This has to be something bad, surely.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
546 Posts
Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Update

I saw the ophthalmologist today. Apparently my eyes are fine.

That should be a "good thing", however it means that this problem is probably neurological in origin.

Soooo......it's off to the neurologist ASAP to see if I have a brain tumour.

I hope it'll all resolve in the end.

Monkeydust
 
1 - 20 of 34 Posts
Top