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Ive had mild dr for 16 years( didnt care much, could life fine), a good year ago i got dp through obsessing over it. Ive never had ANY dp before.

My STUPID FUCKING HEAD just thought one day " hey tehre is this horrible thing called depersonalization, why not get worried about that". So i did.

Long story short, i focused so hard on myself combined with spirituality and terrible anxiety. boom= dont feel like myself. IS THERE ANY MORE RETARDED WAY TO GET THIS SHIT? FUCK THIS.

Now 15 months later im still obsessing like a mfker, overthinking not only myself but EVERY aspekt of my life, scrambling for the solution. reading about trauma, dp, dissociation, EVERYTHING. Im a freaking expert now lol.

But all this shit just leaves me sooooo stressed and my DR has been INSANE due to all this. Ive overthought everything to a point where i have zero idea whats going on anymore. Like repeating a word over and over until it looses its meaning, except that word is my life. I feel completely lost, dont know what to do.

Ive had glimpses of my old life coming back whenever i manage to let go for a little while, but then i start obsessing again. One thought that hinders me the most is that ive had mild dr before all this, and now i think i cant go back to that point, like my "disease" has progressed lol. Even tho 15 months ago i was happier than ive ever been and dr was totally in the background.

I BRIUGHT THIS SHIT ON; FUCK ME.

Interestingly when i was so fixated about the dp, i thought "the dr is ajoke compared to this lol" now the dr is actually more debilitating than the not really feeling like myself thing. A fucking mess.

im so deep down the rabit shithole of obsession...any advice is welcome.
 

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Nobody is as dumb as me. I did this over and over and over again, expecting different results. (That's a definition of insanity, isn't it...)

Of course, you know you need to deal with the anxiety underlying your obsessiveness.

In the meantime, new obsessions could help. Preferably healthy, enjoyable obsessions that really stir up your emotions and that produce something of value, but anything will work. Your mind can become obsessed with anything if you give it a little encouragement. If you need any suggestions, let me know! :mrgreen:

Ive had mild dr for 16 years( didnt care much, could life fine), a good year ago i got dp through obsessing over it. Ive never had ANY dp before.

My STUPID FUCKING HEAD just thought one day " hey tehre is this horrible thing called depersonalization, why not get worried about that". So i did.

Long story short, i focused so hard on myself combined with spirituality and terrible anxiety. boom= dont feel like myself. IS THERE ANY MORE RETARDED WAY TO GET THIS SHIT? FUCK THIS.

Now 15 months later im still obsessing like a mfker, overthinking not only myself but EVERY aspekt of my life, scrambling for the solution. reading about trauma, dp, dissociation, EVERYTHING. Im a freaking expert now lol.

But all this shit just leaves me sooooo stressed and my DR has been INSANE due to all this. Ive overthought everything to a point where i have zero idea whats going on anymore. Like repeating a word over and over until it looses its meaning, except that word is my life. I feel completely lost, dont know what to do.

Ive had glimpses of my old life coming back whenever i manage to let go for a little while, but then i start obsessing again. One thought that hinders me the most is that ive had mild dr before all this, and now i think i cant go back to that point, like my "disease" has progressed lol. Even tho 15 months ago i was happier than ive ever been and dr was totally in the background.

I BRIUGHT THIS SHIT ON; FUCK ME.

Interestingly when i was so fixated about the dp, i thought "the dr is ajoke compared to this lol" now the dr is actually more debilitating than the not really feeling like myself thing. A fucking mess.

im so deep down the rabit shithole of obsession...any advice is welcome.
 
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