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Top 8 Mistakes DP/DRers make :)

11084 Views 33 Replies 8 Participants Last post by  Someoneone
I am the first one who never believed in psychological therapies and I will always be sceptical about most of them, BUT DP/DR IS EXCEPTION.

The Holy Grail Of Curing DP/DR really literally solves beats DP/DR completely, yes, to a point where you literally can't even remember what DP/DR used to feel like, but instead you just remember it as "something that felt awfully awkward and awkwardly awful".

Here is my personal opinion on the top 8 mistakes that DP/DR people make when trying to cure their DP/DR:

1.Not getting physically examined.

Get your blood/stool/urine/skin/amino acids/minerals/vitamins/hormons tests done!!!! at least 40% of my DP/DR was due to Lysine and Zinc deficiency.

For many it was Sleep Apnea that caused it entirely or for the most part.

2.Neglecting other mental disorders that may have caused DP/DR in the first place (DP/DR is nothing but a branch of anxiety).

Visit a psychiatrist and of course always seek for a natural solution first and then if it doesn't work, take your psychiatrist's advice.

3.Not creating conditions for healing DP/DR.

You can't expect to not be anxious at least on a subconscious level if you have some serious life problems. First solve them all and then once fine with your life, beating DP/DR is actually very easy. As long as you have some serious, severe life problems that really bother you your anxiety will always reoccur for sure and in turn possibly even provoke DP/DR again.

4.Not enough sleep or poor sleeping patterns.

Just as it's mentioned in The Holy Grail Of Curing DP/DR, 8 hours of sleep is the best, because it is not too much but not too little either. Lay as early as you can.

If you notice that daytime naps trigger DP/DR, avoid them (for me daytime naps were the number 1 trigger and for some others they actually helped, so determine on your own).

5.Feeling guilty/anxious about beign relaxed. (this was my biggest misatke :D)

Thoughts like these - "Oh should I really relax at a time like this!? Or should I perhaps relax a bit more!? Oh wait! What if I relax too much!?" will only put your attention back on DP/DR and will make you more anxious.

RELAX!!! Being at peace never brought any harm to anyone, you can be sure about that.

I know I know it is kind of hard to calm down with all those worries, but trust me, your body and mind will start picking up the calm mindset with the time.

It's one of those things that is very hard to start, but once you slip into the first "calm day" it will gradually become easier and easier, then the time will iron it all out and once out of DP/DR, you'll be thinking - "how the heck did I manage to feel that way in the first place?!" :)

6.Spending too much time alone in your room in front of your PC.

This doesn't mean you should get freaked out if you worked for 8 hours on your PC (I am into CG and IT myself) or if you played some Final Fantasy/Command And Conquer like games for couple of hours (come on, those franchises are way too awesome! :D) it is ok, it just means that you should GO OUTSIDE SOMETIMES FOR CHRIST SAKE! :D Refresh contacts with your friends, make new friends, pick good people as your friends, get rid of bad "friends", be a good person, fall in love etc.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Although it is not something you should be freaked about, the speed of your recovery definitely depends on how much you avoid being alone and spending time on surfing and reading creepy stories like ours :D

7.Being a crybaby about a relapse or a bad day.

I am the sorest loser you will EVER MEET. PERIOD. Yet I learned to be fine with occasional relapses which helped me soooo much. These days I don't even remember when those relapses have happened.

8.Thinking about DP/DR, then thinking about thinking about DP/DR, then thinking about what your dog who's name is Bob btw (did I guess? :D) thinks about you having DP/DR while playing Red Alert 2 and would he bite you if he knew that you were using dog units as a cannon fodder in the game...then getting anxious about it all and then get depressed about being anxious and then getting angry about feeling all of that again and then AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! I hope you see the pattern :)

So just think less, and live more! Everything is going to be fine, and no, Bob is not going to bite you :)

Just for the record, I never went to a psychiatrist and never took ANY drugs. I suspect I have severe ADHD yet I have still beat my DP/DR completely, though I still have some anxiety but that's due to a huge life problem that I have, but I know that I'll solve that one just as I solved all the other ones so far!

So that's it, that was my personal opinion and I hope I didn't bore you with such a long post. In case I later realize that I miss some of the common mistakes I'll make sure to add it! :)

Greetings from Serbia! ;)
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Think less. Live more. Stop worrying, relax, go outside, meet new friends. Have a life. Dont let Depersonaliztion become your life. Makes sense to me!

I've heard it enough times to believe that you are absolutely right. If you want to snap out of Depersonalization, you have just outlined the rules that work!
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Exactly Skynet! It is as simple as that.

Sometimes things that are simple are the most effective. I guarantee that DP/DR is the most awful mental condition but ironically is the easiest and least expensive one to treat.

If anyone has any questions about my experience,needs any help, or simply wants to chat with me and be friends, feel free to contact me. I'm always for it ;)
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Threads which mention red alert 2 in them should be given a huge amount of respect. I honor you.
this thread is true as well.
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Once i let go of the worry and the fear, my healing process began. Great advice for anyone suffering from this disorder.
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@Delicate, I agree! You need jsut a small imbalance of some of those minerals/vitamins/whatever to start experiencing some health problems and some really bad symptoms. (A girl that I know lost sense of smell completely just because of moderate zinc deficiency, and got it back as soon as she started taking zinc).

People must be educated about this more. Of course that doesn't mean that you should become a total paranoid and start recognizing yourself in descriptions of every possible disease :) But checking your health here and there just to be safe can neve be bad. Especially turn your attention on Tryptophan deficiency!

Btw I like your sig, it's perfect.

@heartless, I am glad you agree comrade! :) Respect is mutual! RA2 forever!

@NEEDMOREBLAZE, exactly, that's exactly when the healing process begins, every technique that includes worry is nothing but a "1 step forward 1 steps back". Although time alone does solve it for some, but it's a loooong time so why relying on it? Stop worrying today.
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That's it. I am going to start a blog on how to accept. IT CAN BE TRICKY. I will introduce some techniques that i used to help me achieve acceptance.
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That is great to hear! Keep it up people! :)
Did you also experience pure o - thinking everything was not real? And trying to prove it wrong? Laura
@Laura, Oooh yes :) You have no idea how much of such thinking I used to experience.

#5 common mistake I've listed in this topic is extremely related to this even though it may not make sense to you right away.

I used to have this feeling of "if I stop proving myself that I am real and that everything is real, I'll lose all the arguments and fall into oblivion, so I have to keep it up, I must!".

How silly I was :D :D :D it wasn't something I really literally believed all the time, but it became a habit, an obsession. Because of that I was rarely ever relaxed :)

The reality is opposite, the more you strain and obsess about proving your reality and the more you think about it the more tired and panicked your brain is going to become and in turn is going to put that protecting mechanism on AKA derealization.

I feel so embarrassed now that I tell you all this but hey, I'd rather be embarrassed than knowledge-stingy ;)
Hahaha you are welcome!

Relax, I know how freaked out you are, I know the feeling all too well :)

For me it was about 3-4 years, simply because for those 3-4 years I never thought that accepting it and not giving damn about it could actually heal it. As soon as I realized that things started to change.
I have to say, it really helps knowing someone could have that obsession badly for a long time and still get better. :)
Hosscat, I'm glad :) Cause other people's stories (both on this forum and elsewhere) had same type of effect on me :) First I was skeptical, then I tried and failed couple of times due to mistake #5 :D

And then I started picking it up and proved myself that it actually works :)

Laura, Yes all sorts of uncertainties including that one. And yes I'm literally 100% better now as for DP/DR :)

Hahaha, come on relax, I can see anxiety being emitted from the letters that you've typed :))) The sooner you start making calmness a habit of yours the sooner you'll heal ;)
Yeah, whats getting me is that the anxiety is finally starting to subside, but I still feel doubt. I understand #5, im afraid ill end up believing the thought, as when you try to disprove it you never can satisfactorily without another 'what if' coming up. So you said you finally accepted things may not be real, and yet you didn't end up ''feeling' they were if that makes sense?
@Laura, hahaha, yes, that's a perfect sign that with you its purely psychological :) And you should not "TRY HARD", I mean you should, but not in a strained way, relax (I'm seriously going to repeat it to you all until you get bored and give up on being under pressure :D). There's nothing wrong with being energetic and fidgety by nature I am myself like that, but don't be under pressure to do this.

Next time you find yourself having a good time and forgetting about DP/DR and then suddenly remembering it, don't be like "oh no oh no, it's coming again why did I have to remember it now!", instead be like "oh I just remembered it, who cares, I can still function with or without it".

@Hosscat, "as when you try to disprove it you never can satisfactorily without another 'what if' coming up" - exactly! And that's why you have to practice to let go of "what if" thought, to not care. Think like this "when did I ever benefit from asking myself "what if?", I never had any use of it, the world didn't fall apart, everything was still the same yet I panicked and questioned myself unnecessarily all the time!".

I figured that most of it was - being afraid that breaking your thought habits will somehow change something for worse...That's the most silly thing I could ever think of, now when I remember it I laugh and I feel embarrassed :D Breaking your obsessive thought patterns can only change things FOR BETTER. Mark my words.
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The hardest part is it actually feels like ive lost my family some way. Ill be with my mom and dad, and it just doesn't feel like they are really there, so I feel extremely lonely. This is the hardest part to accept, but did you go through this? And when its better does it feel like you get your loved ones back?
for those of you who still struggle, i advise NOT to go to the other parts of this forum. people on it are scared to death and update everybody on how shit they

feel and how they are "sure" it is permanent. read recovery stories and some helpful blogs/material instead. don't let other peoples negativity bring you down.
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@Laura, Thank you! I actually think my English is rather very goofy since it's not my native language.

Anyway, you really remind me of myself when I was at my worst :) full of questions, scared and confused :)
The whole confusion and feeling weird may partially be due to your pregnancy, I've heard many women are feeling weird when pregnant, so you definitely should be better once you give birth to your baby.
Again, as for sleeping I'd advise you to have consistent patterns, for example I believe it would be perfect to lay early and get up early, sleep about 8 hours and make it a habit.

As for my worst, dear God, where do I start yet how to avoid scaring you :D - I thought I was LITERALLY losing my mind due to a brain tumor :D hahahahaha! I thought I was lost in my own thoughts, have became a different person, I thought that somebody cranked down the intensity of my consciousness and awakeness from 100% to 2% and that nothing will ever be the same again. I kept describing my DP/DR to my friends as "you know that awful taste in mouth that stays in your mouth for a day or even two when you eat something awful or spoiled? Well imagine a mental version of that feeling, plus it's 1000 times worse...a horrible awkward weird unexplainable mental taste not willing to leave your brain!", cause that was the only figurative way I could explain it with.
I've became paranoid and it all just made it worse. It was absolutely horrifying, it can never be described with words.

But hey, I've beaten it, and it was so much easier than I thought it would be ;) I never lost anything, as a matter of fact I am stronger and smarter than ever due to this experience, and you will be too.

@Hosscat, Definitely! Definitely the saddest and scariest part, I totally know what you're talking about. You kind of view everything differently including your family, on top of that you start questioning yourself "why do I not enjoy being around them as much as I used to" and then start feeling guilty about it. That's silly, it's not you, it's DP/DR and depression that just changes your view on everything including your family and once your get out of DP/DR and stabilize yourself everything is going to be good :) So you must not feel guilty or bad, just let it go and relax.

@Heartless, you're so right, at this stage, reading our creepy stories will at best slow your healing process down! Go outside, or if you have to stay home watch some comedy, it helps so much! :)

BTW! One very effective thing for sleeping well and for DP/DR in general is a certain random exercise that I came up with.

Doing short jumps using only your calve muscles for 10-20 minutes constantly and then stretching your legs after that. After this I've usually slept well and felt that pleasant version of tiredness in my legs :)

But really any exercise that rises your heart rate constantly for 20-30 minutes (like 20-30 minutes of long distance running) triggers the release of serotonin and dopamine (exactly what many of us DP/DRers miss a little bit due to a lot of stress).

Of course, Laura don't do these exercises while you're pregnant, unless your doctor tells you so.
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