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Instead of doing what's right and respecting others, most people do what benefits them, regardless if it's right or wrong.

I always used to make people feel comfortable asking for stuff from me. If I had a thing they wanted, I would offer without them asking, because I did what's right, not what's in my authority.

Most people are also irresponsible, they delay stuff, they ignore others, they procrastinate, and just care about being care free at the moment. What I read about letting go and becoming care free (The philosophies that got me to let go my personality), made me like most people. Yes I am a perfectionist, I want everything to be taken care of, I am responsible even if that means not to be as care free as others.

The reason I let go because I felt relieved letting go all this responsibility to be good, to do what's right, to make people feel comfortable, to push hard to win, to get angry at second class behavior... Yes I felt like a big responsibility disappeared.

But with time I've realized that most people are like sheep, and I became one, following not leading, wanting to eat and sleep, letting go my high standards for myself, and doing what I CAN instead of what's right. I hate most people because I hate what I have become, I know that.

Moments like people making me feel I need to beg or follow them for them to give me what I want from them wake me up. They say no because it's in their authority, because they want to stay care free and procrastinate, because I don't mean anything to them in their lives; instead of doing what's right and treating all people in a good way regardless if they have the authority or not, if they are needed or need something.

In summary fuck being care-free and irresponsible, it's time for us to wake up, to be the best version of ourselves, to have high standards for ourselves and not accept second class behavior from us or from others.
 
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You strike me as the kind of person who can't do something or have an opinion without sliding too one extreme or the other. Life isn't black and white, so it's important to learn to compromise between seemingly conflicting ideals. You won't get anywhere by taking no responsibility, but take to much and you just burn out.

So, why not both?
 

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I understand your statement and agree with you about a fair amount of it.

But I think Antimony has a good point about black and white thinking, especially this "You won't get anywhere by taking no responsibility, but take to much and you just burn out."

Trying to fix the world just doesn't work. The world is working just fine in its crazy complicated way- even if it was heading for disaster, it still works. Fixing yourself, though, in many ways is part of fixing the world- your world. You can't see others clearly until you see yourself clearly.

Something that you seem to see now is that you can't change who you are. If you have a passion for fairness, equality and thoughtfulness- it's who you are. The trick is figuring out how to be yourself in a world that may not support you to be yourself and the values you hold; to make it work in a world where people don't live these values and/or might even try to take advantage of it as if it were a weakness.

The funny thing is, history is full of people who went against the grain and got no support in the beginning, but they believed in themselves and knew it was right for them; whether they assumed it was right for others is up for debate- but I would venture to guess they weren't too concerned with it.

The bottom line is that there are plenty of really good people out there, people who are just the opposite of what you are describing. The type you are describing do seem to get all the attention in society and the media- which is why the term "the squeaky wheel gets the oil" exists. Eventually, though, individuals mature and learn to get a new wheel and stop concerning themselves with the wheel that continues to squeak.
 
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