[Martinelv]

Now, for those of you who aren't from the UK - The Inland Revenue is the government department that collects taxes. Well, imagine my surprise (the same kind of surprise when your doctor accidentally puts a rectal thermometer in your mouth instead of an oral one) when a demand for 1430 pounds of apparently unpaid tax arrived !! What the blazes ? How the hell am I going to pay that? I simply haven't got the money but these bastards don't care. I made up swear words that make the ordinary ones sound as rude as a peck on the cheek from Julie Andrews. Perhaps I could sell parts of my body. Well, apart from the vital ones (which are probably knackered anyway), which organs are non-essential ? The spleen? What does that do? Can't donate blood because, a. they don't pay for it, and b. my blood is crap and full of chemicals.

And knowing my luck my sperm probably doesn't have any tails.

:evil:

 

[sleepingbeauty]

but martin, its all going to a good cause. you should be happy.

 

[Martinelv]

I cannot think of the appropriate words to describe the full horror of that picture. Although that girl on the right might get it. Oh, who am I kidding. They'd all get it. Even that gay-looking bloke at the back.

But yes, I'm really glad that all my hard earned tax money is going to finance the NHS so that they can keep performing the regular Saturday night ritual of pumping out the guts of 18 year old girls who've drank 163 bottles of cherry lager, which, of course, they purchased for the enormous sum of 50 pence a bottle. Really couldn't be happier.

 

[g-funk]

Lizzie Bardsley from Wife Swap will probably get half of it Martin

 

[Martinelv]

God, don't remind me of that woman. How did she get famous? For being a fat, loud-mouthed, slob-tart welfare scrounging bastard? Do you think she actually realises that it is because of these somewhat lesser qualities that she is famous? If that happened to me, I'd kill myself. Imagine the whole world realising you are utter scum ! She needs to be removed from the gene pool, but NO - she goes and spawns four hundred little scum-bags to continue her legacy of bleeding the country dry and looking down on other people even though she is only fit to lick the shit off a rats arse.

Sorry. Bad mood today. Goddam taxes.