Terrified of feeling normal

1068 Views 9 Replies 5 Participants Last post by jake, Aug 1, 2005

M A R S

Discussion Starter · Jul 30, 2005

I started to feel my self acting a tiny bit more normal tonight, and frankly that terrifies me.

Maybe its the buspar Finley starting to work, or maybe its bi-polar disorder.

I feel normal and then freak out that that's wrong and its part of some mental illness i must have. Then i think if i start to get better what happens it this is all fake and I'm really just so much worse now.

Has anyone else ever had feelings like this?

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blackwinded

· #9 · Aug 1, 2005

I'm also terrified of being normal. Actually, i think i'm pretty much phobic of it. I've been "insane" all my life. I have schizophrenia and i started hearing voices and seeing things when i was about 4. The delusions and other symptoms didn't develope until later on, but i have become very use to it all. For me, this is normal. When i was put on antipsychotic drugs about a year ago, just about all my symptoms went away and this only made me depressed and mad. I went off the meds, and for now, i refuse to be on them.

-Becka

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