I see things as they should be inside my home. Well, maybe the depth is a bit fucked. But as soon as i walk out of the door everything looks extremely fake. The trees freak me out the most. The cloudy days are the worst tbh, with the bright white light and no sun at all. At night i do feel a litte bit more at peace when i'm outside.
Afaik i had this since i was very young, not the DR particularly, but the fact that nights were more soothing and calming than days. I always played my best soccer matches in the late evening with no anxiety at all. When i played in the morning or at midday with the bright white light i freaked out a lot and did hyperventilate during matches.
It all seems so connected in a way, but i'm too tired to figure it all out lol.
To give you some hope: there was a time in my life where all of this did not bother me anymore and all the symptoms dissipated. In the end it's all about having something to focus on and live for which is more important to you than your symptoms.
Afaik i had this since i was very young, not the DR particularly, but the fact that nights were more soothing and calming than days. I always played my best soccer matches in the late evening with no anxiety at all. When i played in the morning or at midday with the bright white light i freaked out a lot and did hyperventilate during matches.
It all seems so connected in a way, but i'm too tired to figure it all out lol.
To give you some hope: there was a time in my life where all of this did not bother me anymore and all the symptoms dissipated. In the end it's all about having something to focus on and live for which is more important to you than your symptoms.
