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Maybe some of u heard.. a comedian Brody Stevens died, I only knew him because I watch podcasts and watched him on the tiger belly podcast with Bobby lee, it was sad, he seemed like a really cool guy, sucks that that happend and it's weird he died on the same day that podcast aired exactly a year ago..
anyways
It got me thinking, people wonder y people commit suicide, as of right now, I wouldn't want to do it, even with dp, I still want to live
But at 1 time, I was taking medicine and I just quit cold turkey, a few days later
My goodness..
if people who r suicidal felt like I did those couple of days, I don't want to say I can understand, I was blessed to only feel that for 2 days, but if that was a constant every day
God bless..
I quit this medicine cold turkey and for 2 days, all I could 'feel' and think was to kill myself, like legit.. constantly in my mind, the only thing that felt right was to kill myself, and it sucked because I didn't want to, but that feeling kept hitting me, it is the worst feeling I ever had..
and it was weird, I was on a vacation with my dad, we were just chillin at a pizza place and he was talking to me about football, and literally he's just there telling me about football and I'm trying to hold a conversation but it just keeps lingering in my mind those bad feelings, and I remember he got a phone call and I was just trapped in my head, literally were on vacation having a good dinner, and I was about to burst out in tears cus of the feeling and thoughts I was having, I can't explain it, it literally felt like I had to do it, and I didn't want to.. but it was like I had to.. thank god at the time I had a girlfriend and I called her later and that took my mind off of it
And it only lasted 2 days thank god
But if people who commit suicide have those feelings 24/7 or constantly and just can't take it, man it was hard, I don't want to say I would understand but man..
if anyone knows what I'm talking about, maybe I was just expercing something way worse, idk but if u ever get those feelings, I contact a friend asap, talk to close family people, and if that doesn't help, u have to go to a doctor I'd say..
and I ain't talking about the I'm feeling bad for myself boo who, there r times I feel bad for myself, but I can get over it real quick, I hate some people who say there depressed and really aren't, they think it's like something cool to be, to be depressed.. like there ACTUAL depressed, were everything u do u can't get out of it, and then there's depressed when it's urself or u have a bad couple of days, idk I'm rambling, just bringing that up cus I saw this Facebook post from this emo girl I know posting some straight bullshit, anyways back to the topic..
If suicidal people have those feelings.. god bless man.. I wouldn't know how to explain it, it was literally like I had to kill myself but I didn't want to, worst feeling ever, has anyone else went cold turkey off medicine and felt that? God bless I hope not, and like I said, if u ever felt that, gotta Talk to close friends
I was happy I had a girlfriend, when I was with her I felt like she was kinda my job.. it seems bad to say that.. but I felt like whenever I was with her i felt like I had to make her happy all the time, entertain her all the time, do all the extra stuff just to keep her smiling haha, and when I called or I think she called, my brain flipped and and I was just trying to be the best boyfriend I could be, didn't want to feel all sad, tried my best to make her laugh and all that, so if u ever get those feelings, I say a close friend can really help, or a girlfriend to if u got 1, i ain't have friends, thank god I had a gf then ha
Anyways I'm going on..
just felt like making a post
 
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