it's an obsession...a trick of your brain to lure you in to monitoring yourself. your brain is presenting you with something so BAD that you feel you HAVE to watch the thought or watch yourself to suppress it/prevent it from happening. but truth is, it's just a thought. i think because you have become so skilled at getting rid of your anxiety and DR that your brain is trying to grapple for something to lure you back into some kind of self-control/self-observation. its been a while since i've had one of these thoughts but i just kind of imagine it dissolving in my mind like a sugar cube in warm water. the thought itself is not the problem, it's the importance you give it.