[CaroleDaBoyz]

It's been a long time, so here's an update.

Decided to focus my negative energy into positive energy. Got involved in a feral cat rescue project last fall and it led to me setting up a cat welfare society for TNR (trap, neuter, return) programs. We're doing good stuff and helping lots of cats. Very positive stuff.

I have a new boy, Che, about six months old now. My beloved Hadji had a heart attack last October and was gone instantly, but remains in my thoughts every day. My three other "old" boyz are doing well, and are constantly amused by Che's antics. He certainly livens up the house.

Carole

 

[Guest]

Hey Carole, so nice to see you back here
Losing your beloved Hadji (yes I remember!) must have caused a great deal of pain, since he was so special to you and knowing your cats are like children to you. Sorry about that, but glad you've found you another new Boy. :wink:

Good to hear from you.

Wendy

 

[CaroleDaBoyz]

Hi Wendy & Amangela,

Only back very briefly - my life has been taken over by cats and I don't have much time for forums any more ... which is probably a good thing for me.

I've been busy lobbying local governments for funding for feral cat alters, setting up a spring "cat carnival" to raise funds, trapping ferals, etc. It's a cat's world! And I'm loving it.

Hope everyone is doing better. I thought I might end up back here when I lost my Hadji, but I went to the Buddha for guidance, and between that and refusing to deal with it - I've survived.

The few times I do think about it, the pain is too overwhelming - pretty scary for an ex-DPer. I know I'll have to deal it eventually, and I'll do it when I'm ready.

I didn't intend to get another cat, but when I saw Che, I had no choice but to adopt him. Seriously. I swear it was a message from Hadji, letting me know he was OK, and although I've never believed in this stuff, I think Hadji communicates with me through Che.

Either I'm (mentally) healthy and doing fine - or completely cracked - but ok with it. :?: Doesn't matter - whatever works and keeps me from being DPed again.

Carole

 

[Guest]

Hiya,mad about cats Carole
So pleased you have something to feel passionate about.
What's life without passion?

Sorry to hear about the loss of your much loved baby.
It took me well over a year to get a new puppy after I lost my old girl.

I'm very glad that life is being kind to you.
Love Shelly

 

[Guest]

Hi dearest,
My heart goes out to you over your loss. The Hadji was one and only....a cat among cats. I truly adored him. I've still got his photo, where he is flying through time and space (Super Hadje).

I'll tell ya - clearly I have NO magic answers for grief, and you know I completely understand your devastation. But one thing we get when we love a cat (or dog - Pugsley made me write this, he's watching me, you understand) is that we are giving them something that will require our own eventual pain. We know going in, we will outlive them. We are willing to love (often with our whole heart) a beautiful creature we will one day lose.

We love them that much.

And they're worth it.

They know. Somehow. Somewhere. They know that gift we gave. They know we loved them that much.

Big hug (and a nod to the photo of the Hadjimon)

Love,
Janine

p.s. a nice hello to Mr. Che (Hadji can vouch for me, if he's shy.)

 

[CaroleDaBoyz]

Hi,

I know what you mean about getting another animal after losing one, Shelly. It took me seven years after losing Ralphie to get another kitty. I was so afraid to lose another one.

Funny thing with Che, I asked Hadji to give me a sign that he was OK, and when I saw Che I instantly picked him up and told the SPCA I was taking him. Didn't think about it, nothing. It was like Hadji's WILL and not mine that I should take this little guy.

When I talk to Hadji at night and Che is on my lap I swear that sometimes it's Hadji's spirit in my arms. Che becomes a different kitty, it's like he becomes Hadji for a few brief moments.

But Che is also very much his own boy. I always say he's 5% Hadji and 95% Che. And he's the lovingest kitten I've ever seen. And smart, and above all...FUN.

I miss Hadji terribly, but the distraction of Che makes me laugh and makes me love. I've told him all about Hadjimon, and I think he knows him well. BTW Janine, I'll pass on your love to Hadji tonight when I talk to him.

I haven't been able to deal with the grief yet, Janine. To me Hadji is still alive, just not visible any more. I went crazy for about 15 minutes after his heart attack, screaming, and crying, and hitting. Poor G. I've never reacted like that to any death. I've always been the one in control.

Hadji was not only the most beloved of my heart, but also my best friend. And the one death I was least prepared to deal with. I knew I was headed for DP land again right after, so I sought serenity in the teachings of the Buddha, and it's helped me through. Eventually I'll have to go into therapy to deal with it. There's no way I can deal with this one alone. Every time I think of him being gone, I feel like my heart is being ripped out. The pain is excruciating, so I refuse to think about it, and I act like he's alive and with me. Sounds crazy, but not as crazy as I'd be if I faced the truth.

He really was the "finest kitty ever born". I don't want to dwell on him, it's too hard. I have my little bedtime talks with him, and that's all I can do for now.

Che is a hoot - an absolute delight. He makes life good for everyone in his little sphere. My big guy, Vanya, has adopted him and gives him baths! The only other kitty Vanya mothered was Hadji. I guess he knows too.

Carole

 

[Guest]

oh Carole it must have been heart breaking to lose your beloved Hadji so unexpectedly.

At least my staffy girl was very old.I found it lonely without her.She was my old mate,we'd been through many hardships together.
She licked my tears away many times.

I think our pets find us.
My new puppy is a very fussy eater,almost unheard of for a staffy,they usually live to eat.
My daughter said she was the last to be chosen from the litter because she had to wait for a woman who would spoil her.Feed her mince and steak........a woman like me.

All the best Love Shelly

 

[CaroleDaBoyz]

Hi Shelly,

For me it was a terrible shock, but for Hadjimon it was good that he went so quickly. There was no illness, no suffering, only a very sudden end. It would have been unconscionable for Hadji to suffer, he was such a gentle soul. He left us with a quiet dignity, the Hadjimon way.

He knew how precious he was to me, and how much I loved him. For once in my life there was nothing left unsaid. He knew that I worshipped him. We had over nine years of very special love, every day.

As hard as it was for me, I hope when the time comes that my other boyz go as quickly. I can't bear the thought of my boyz suffering. As difficult as sudden loss is for those remaining, it's better that way.

Carole

 

[Guest]

My new puppy is a very fussy eater,almost unheard of for a staffy,they usually live to eat.
My daughter said she was the last to be chosen from the litter because she had to wait for a woman who would spoil her.Feed her mince and steak........a woman like me.

Shelly, I was trying SO hard not to pass judgment on you. You, like our beloved Carole, are another wonderful animal person like moi, so I just couldn't stand having these frightened feelings about you....yet...

see, I didn't have my reading glasses on. I thought you were feeding the dear pup MICE and steak.

God help us all,
may I just go quickly too, when my own time comes, lol

Love,
Janine
p.s. Carole, I'd be honored to see a photo of his Che-ness whenever the mood strikes you. I am so happy that he can make you laugh. My beloved canine has made me laugh out loud every day for nearly 10 years. Pets. Life itself.

 

[Guest]

Hi missy miss Janine,

Shelly, I was trying SO hard not to pass judgment on you. You, like our beloved Carole, are another wonderful animal person like moi,

LOL (like moi)

You almost always put French words in your posts.... try to speak French and I'd be honored! Come one :wink:

K xxx

 

[CaroleDaBoyz]

Janine...I thought you'd never ask!!!

 

[Guest]

Please tell Mr. Che that he is utterly adorable! I love the head markings - re: his name.....does he resemble a little revolutionary (wearing a rebel cap? lol) hence...Che Guvera?

His eyes are truly soulfull - like he's looking INTO you.

I suggest the caption for the second photo, however, should read "uh..oh, I think my new mom has a shopping problem.."

Welcome to a wonderful family, Che! And please keep posing for photos!

Love,
Aunt Janine

 

[CaroleDaBoyz]

Dear Auntie Janine,

That picture is with some of the goodies from my puny little Christmas stocking. I didn't do nearly as well as I expected - I asked Santa for a pony!

Love & kitty kisses,
Che

PS: Of course he's a revolutionary! You know me, names to live up to! His full name is Commandante Che Guevara de la Serna - just like my greatest hero.

 

[Guest]

Observation about the Commandante (lol..I knew that was his namesake, lol):

his ears appear highly unusual...very feral, very wild animal ears. I LIKE them, not a criticism (in case he's sensitive), but they look like they're highly perched and very UPright. He's ready for anything!

:lol:

 

[Guest]

Very, very cute Carole 8)

 

[Guest]

Che is such a darling,so adorable........who could resist.

When I was a girl I had a white cat that was deaf.
Somebody told me(when a girl) that white cats can often be deaf?is this so?

 

[g-funk]

OMG, how have I not found this thread sooner?

I am the biggest cat lover to ever walk this planet

I heard that a white cat with blue eyes is deaf, or that a cat with one blue eye and one brown eye is deaf on the blue side....
Wouldn't take any of this as gospel...

Che is CUTE

 

[CaroleDaBoyz]

Blue-eyed, pure white cats often are deaf. Don't know all the details but it's something about recessive color genes. Not sure about the odd-eyed.

Che doesn't have any hearing problems...well, except when I say NO. Probably an environmental thing - all my boyz have the same problem!

Amangela, Che loves to play, and he's up for a play-date any time.

Message to Auntie Janine: Of course my ears are long...all the better to hear lovey talk...and the can opener.