[Snansje]

Hi,
Ever since i developed tolerance for SSRI meds I start seeing weird symptoms. Thats why i tapered off them, after 1 year my symptoms still remain.

i have been diagnosed with PAWS, which can mimmic
-DP&DR
-Brainfog
-anxiety
-depression
-panic attacks
-intruisive thoughts
-pressure in my head
-feeling of impending doom.

basically started with 52 symptoms withdrawal related and now 8 are leftovers.

serotine syndrome(mild)
Tremmors
Akathesia
PSSD(this is a real bad one)
Dizziness
Heart palpitations
Chest pain
Paranoia
restless leg syndrome
Speech impairment
Cognitive impairment
Shitty metabolism even when working out. 6-7 times a week on high lvl
Facial tension
Muscle twitches(not small muscle, i mean whole back muscles being spastic)
Highly affected by noise, taste, sight over stimulating.
Bad teeth health even when brushing good
Hair and skin issues
Flu like symptoms (sinuses feel stuck without being stuck)
Fatigue

Leftovers and DP/DR related are:
mostly DP&DR, intruisive thoughts. Small physical symptoms.

my fears are actually 3 big ones which all other fears split from. Which most intruisive thoughts come from.

1. Going crazy
Splitbrain, multipersonality, Brain turning against me, losing touch of reality.

Triggers; mental health talks, depersonalization and Derealization
2. Reality breaking
often about Quantum mechanics, scared of existance, philosophy… these things are often that haunts me. Especially multiverse and superditermanism. These strange concepts.

Triggers; thinking, science stuff, the words quantum mechanics
3. Hurting loved ones
Not going into the details

There where times where i was scared shitless because of the moon or sun. Being sucked out of reality.

these intruisive thoughts cycles often come up after DP&DR, but sometimes the other way around. Or just the fears.

Slowly I’m improving the longer i’m off meds. Both thanks to knowledge about the drugs and DP & DR. Most important i’m in withdrawal.

i know my way out off DP & DR, but the existential thoughts haunt me. Maybe someone could help me make things more clear.

i’m just tired, 1 year of withdrawal 2 years of hell. I hate the idea of Quantum mechanics, for some reason when i hear the word i go often shock. Even tho i know i miss place things.

this not because of DP and DR, but more of my brain not processing as it should be. DP & DR are not affecting the brain. It just the amygdala hijack. While mine is more of a actual physical “ something “, this is because my brain is actually temporary broken. Live is like driving a car but with 1 broken hand.

talked to 4 medical practitioners in a time span of 5 months, all say the same. Chemical disregulation of the brain.

i’m not allowed to drink, have sex, mastrubate, use stimulants or supplements.My GP forbid me, because everything could trigger a “wave” not only DP & DR symptoms.

good that i see improvements but it will be a long road to go, lets be honest if you truly want to make someones life a HELL. Give then psychmeds without explaining the risks and let them stop CT(coldturkey).
3 months in and you already are convinced you died and ended up in hell. This is what i actually believed in for a while.

Sadly i’m not having the “normal” version of DP/DR. Atleast i know that withdrawal sufferers from every kind of long term drug usage, be it legal/prescription/illegal.

Addiction is not craving, that is a misunderstanding. its more so that your body stop working making life hellish that you would’ve wished you kept using it.
Even normal “bad” days seem like heaven, even a “bad” day for a normal person is heaven compared to protracted WD. Not to say DP/DR for a person is not bad, because it has overlapping symptoms.

thanks for reading my post, i hope you all a fast recovery. Everyone who is experiencing protracted withdrawal or PAWS i hoor you stay strong, i have seen how life can be without feeling the drugs even in withdrawal. Magic will come.

 

[Chip1021]

I’ve said it before on this site, and it bears repeating now. When it comes to psychiatric drugs: caveat emptor.

I wish you strength and luck in your recovery.

 

[Snansje]

I’ve said it before on this site, and it bears repeating now. When it comes to psychiatric drugs: caveat emptor.

I wish you strength and luck in your recovery.

Nope, i live in a country where it’s indirectly forced upon the patient. Thats called bureaucratic hell(th) system.

it’s not possible to find good support structure within my countries medical system. It’s almost impossible to find therapy without going throught the pill sell phase.

i was underage btw, so blaming me is pretty much being insane.

 

[Chip1021]

Nope, i live in a country where it’s indirectly forced upon the patient. Thats called bureaucratic hell(th) system.

it’s not possible to find good support structure within my countries medical system. It’s almost impossible to find therapy without going throught the pill sell phase.

i was underage btw, so blaming me is pretty much being insane.

I stand corrected, and my apologies. The fact that psych drugs are forced (directly or indirectly) on anybody without their consent or against their will is a gross violation of human rights; therapeutic rape is what it is. I’m sorry this happened to you.

And just to clarify, even if you did voluntarily take the drugs, I wasn’t placing blame on you. I don’t think psych drugs are necessarily bad, some people swear by them. I’m just saying it’s not the “I’m depressed, depression is a disease, antidepressants are the benign treatment for that disease, so taking antidepressants are necessary to bring me back to health” decision that is heavily promoted in our culture. It can be a life-changing decision, good or bad, and should be considered very gravely before diving in.

 

[Ray46]

Which antidepressant did you take? How many mg did you take? How long did you take it? How fast did you tap off?

 

[Snansje]

Which antidepressant did you take? How many mg did you take? How long did you take it? How fast did you tap off?

zoloft 4 years, haldol 8 years. Zoloft 25mg, haldol 10mg.Did such a fast taper that it could’ve been called quick taper. Haldol was 4 months and zoloft was 8 months.

3 months after i still felt the effects of mild serotine syndrome. Alot of physical effects until month 6 after getting off, then the mental stuff started.
Now i’m having a heavy flu which makes everything so much worse.

i keep having strange thoughts, depersonalization and Derealization and fears.

today it’s about my political opinions and religious views, yesterday about reality and quantum mechanics.

basically just getting spammed with all these crazy thoughts over and over and over and over again. Things i know that a real feel something that is keep getting questioning thoughts about.

 

[Snansje]

I also joined surviving antidepressants, and a few other forums. withdrawals and dp/dr are very overlapping. Especially if its related to drugs.