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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am the spouse of a person who is recovering from DPDR, and while I started a long post, I saved it for later if needed, and instead felt it might be better to open myself up to questions. I will likely be intentionally vague on some things as I know my spouse has been in the forums here (though I don't think they have been here in some time now), and they don't know I am here doing this, but I feel in our discussions we've had in the past that it would be incredibly important for me to come back and try to help those who are still here and struggling every day.

List of Peak Symptoms (not all symptoms were constant, so this is the list of all of them that ever happened):
Emotional flatness (feel nothing, no pain, no happiness, ever)

Eye pain

Ear pressure/buzzing

Head pressure (intense)

Brain Fog

Nausea

Dizziness

High Feeling, Constant

Visual Intensity - Like everything was suddenly switched to HD, bright lights also too much to handle.

Nothing Looks Real - 2D Reality I believe is how most people describe it

Pain directly behind the nose, like you were kicked in the face.

Electrical Feeling in the Brain, like a short circuit

Nerve pain, radiates through the entire body, kind of like your arm feel asleep but painful and the whole body.

Sound intensity - Loud sounds are too much to handle

High blood pressure

Alcohol had no effect - Couple drink themselves under the table and still walk around like they never drank, and felt nothing, might as well have been water.

Insomnia, Never Feeling tired or fatigued. Sleep was also broken, couldn't stay asleep for longer than 15-30 minutes without being awoken by one or more of the above symptoms, typically the nerve pain one.

Bright lights or busy places (the store) magnified all the symptoms

Please ask me anything you can think of that might be beneficial to yourself or others here, I'll do my best to answer it as accurately as possible.
 

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Can you describe to me ur spouse diet?

I strongly believe in mind body connection and have always thought that some cases of dp have an underlying health issue.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Can you describe to me ur spouse diet?

I strongly believe in mind body connection and have always thought that some cases of dp have an underlying health issue.
Sure! I have to preface slightly to give some of the story as I believe it's important to your question; the triggering event was the loss of a significant family member, while a large portion of the underlying cause (of the DPDR, IMO) was a tendency to hold emotions in, frequently to "the boiling point", which is generally unhealthy for the brain. With the triggering event, and another family issue that added to that soon after, the DPDR kicked in to help protect her. This is my theory, but I believe it holds truth to it. While the loss of the family member was not entirely unexpected, it was still sudden and unexpected (if that makes sense), and had considerable lead up time in which my spouse become their caretaker for months prior. While we aren't alcoholics by any means, our drinking most definitely increased considerably during the lead up time, and I'm certain did not help matters.
As far as diet, as of two years prior to the DPDR, we had begun eating healthy and working out. We did meal prep every week, worked out 4-5 times a week with high intensity cardio training, and both were in probably the best shape of our lives. Before we changed our eating and workout habits, we had let ourselves go to some extent, ate out frequently, including fast food, and were generally unhealthy. We did a food study at one point as well and found items that we are allergic to and cut them out of our diet as well, which is what lead us to the healthier eating.

Let me know if there is anything else I can help clarify on that.
 

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What do u think help regained her me tal health? Yes i agree emotions definitely was a factor in my dp apart from bad diet. Also i was isolated from friends due to location.

Now that i am better, i am still isolated and i think that is one last piece of the puzzle for my full recovery.

20 years ago though with my first dp, it was just purly bad diet.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
What do u think help regained her me tal health? Yes i agree emotions definitely was a factor in my dp apart from bad diet. Also i was isolated from friends due to location.

Now that i am better, i am still isolated and i think that is one last piece of the puzzle for my full recovery.

20 years ago though with my first dp, it was just purly bad diet.
Sorry about the delay in getting back to you!

There are a lot of little things here and there, but ultimately, the largest helping factor, in my opinion, was pushing my spouse to be active in numerous ways, so that they could forget the DPDR. Going out and being with friends, starting back at the gym, anything that could potentially get them to forget about the symptoms they were experiencing. While the symptoms were awful in the moment, my spouse did start to realize that the more they did things to be active, the more they were likely to temporarily forget, and in those moments the symptoms lessened in intensity. There were times where they would lay in bed all day, reading, researching, studying, OBSESSING, over DPDR and the symptoms. The more I could get them to not do that, the better the day went. I was able to start convincing them of that after a long period of time, but obsessing at the beginning absolutely lengthen and strengthened the DPDR. That didn't mean it was or would become impossible to overcome, it just roots the fear and obsession, and makes it harder to get yourself out of that. Anxiety and obsession builds on each other, so it definitely helps to have someone with a clear head, that you absolutely trust beyond all else, that can continue to pound it in your head that YOUR BRAIN (of the DPDR sufferer) is not in a position to make rational thoughts.

We found a guide online that we bought, that my spouse immediately dismissed as stupid and refused to follow it (this was when they were at their worst of the DPDR symptoms). My goal, was to make my spouse follow it without realizing they were following it, and I do believe that helped.

  • I tried to make sure they got up in the morning when they woke up and started doing something. The best way I found to do this was to make sure that they came to the gym with me when I went, so that instead of staying in bed until I got home, they would get up at 8 or 9 and come be with me, which kept them moving for a couple hours that they would have otherwise never moved. Once that happened, it tended to snowball into "Well I'm up, I might as well stop at the store on my way home", which kept them going even longer, and slowly pushed them back into a routine, which helped to kill the thoughts and obsession.
  • To add to the above point, I pushed them to go out and do something, whether it was us going to the store, hanging out with family, going for a drive (just to drive, or to a place where we could sit in the car and just watch the sunset), and eventually hanging out with friends. Be social, essentially.
  • As hard as it was to do (this was definitely the hardest part), I pushed my spouse to avoid researching and to avoid these forums or anything like it. This one was absolutely the hardest, because they refused to believe that would help. That alone was absolutely the biggest helping factor (stopping the research obsession). Instead of blocking them, or taking their avenues away, I instead tried to utilize the social factor, get them to do activities or go on drives with me, so that their ability to get online and research became limited. This helped, and while it took a massive amount of convincing, I was able to slowly prove to my spouse that they had significantly better days when they didn't research.
  • On this same note, I tried to avoid discussing DPDR with them, as I mentioned above. Unless they were in a really bad headspace, talking about DPDR in a positive or negative context just made everything worse. The only reason I used it when they were in a really bad position was because they trusted me so much, I could sometimes get a little bit of the positive to stick and I could work them out of the thoughts there were into (mostly SI), and it ultimately helped in those scenarios. Otherwise, I avoided any conversation on the subject, and when they got into talking about it, I listened (as telling them to stop always made it worse), and waited for the conversation to peter out; the majority of my side of the conversation was based on positive reinforcement "You're going to be okay", "You will recover 100%", "Don't ask how long it will take, or talk about how long it's been, those thoughts don't help you.", etc.

  • And as I mentioned above as well, I got them to go back to the gym and exercise again. That was a big step, but exercise really does help your body and mind realign, and it absolutely sped up recovery tenfold for numerous reasons.
I could probably continue on and on, but I'll wait and see if you have any more questions before I really go hog wild :)
 

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^ it is ok just type away. I agree on activities and exercise as helpful. There were times though as I exercise or did something I felt like I was in a dream. Doing something familiar helped liked going to Vegas helped me a lot coz I have a lot of fond memories there. Facebook also help me get grounded as I read my friends posts from far away.

Talking w strangers worsened my symptoms. I agree w socializing with people u have known. Can't wait to to go home so I could mingle w friends n relatives.
 
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