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Songs That Relate To DP/DR/Depression etc etc

3678 Views 21 Replies 11 Participants Last post by  dpdpaulson
G
I know that similar posts have been made like this, but obviously musically is extremely important to me, so im making another one

this song probably describes some of the things that I feel and am going through

Illogic- Hate In A Puddle

Verse 1
I hate when it rains, cause in puddles I encounter this guy
Unable to give a rebuttal but swift as the pain flood his eyes
wonderin why he's a gift with no purpose
A priceless one-of-a-kind piece that's worthless
Grounded with no surface
And when he shows one, it's a facade
Cause inside he fights feelings that he was mistake by God
I see his confusion and self-deception
Questions of relevance and intelligence
He holds an illusion of self-acceptance
that he shows to those outside lookin in
He's outside lookin in to his own life; lookin for strength
to carry on as a pawn in this chess game of existance
In his mind he wants to go on to the dawn
and leave the stress that came with existance
Hopin in death he'll find life
Cause as he lives, he roams the dark, tryin to find light
He's made his heart so hard, he doesn't even cry anymore
Cause he's confronted sorrow frequently
His heart's been broken frequently
It's like he's lost some part of him and just haven't found it yet
So in his search, he's left with nothin but questions and regret
All he wants to know is how one day, he's content
and the next day he's cryin
cause his life isn't what he thought life meant
He just wants to be happy, with his love and all
But too often I get messages through telepathic calls
He's askin me through a puddle what more must he endure to continue
But for some reason he knows he most endure to continue

[Chorus]
When I walk past puddles, my reflection calls beggin me
to answer his questions about life and his perceptions
and tell him why I hate him so much
And you wonder why I hate him so much?
Now when I walk past puddles, my reflection calls beggin me
to answer his questions about life, and his perceptions
and tell him why I hate him so much
Damn, I wonder why I hate him so much

Verse 2
Why did I hate him so much? I wondered, pondered on the question
What in my mind caused me to despise my reflection?
I didn't know I just knew when I saw him, how I felt
and hated the fact that he had to play with the cards that he was dealt
He's come in contact with some ill things that can't be explained
Life's extracted his energy to where the pain can't be contained
So to me he comes, sheddin tears like skin
Intimate with some, only the ones he calls friends
If he even exists, he only exists in pain
It's like his life is a myth
and he's been blessed with the gift of shame, I mean
From birth to love he's been betrayed
He's an unknown in how to cope with that pain and dissapointment
he's come to know as he's grown
He feels he stands alone in this world of puddle images
And he awaits the time for when, time finishes
He tries to elevate thought, but he's still chillin in the basement
Awaitin a rebirth of his soul as it fears it's spiritual placement

[Chorus]

Verse 3
God I pray you can give me a purpose or help me find it
Cause on this narrow path of self-damnation, I can't find it
Is it somethin I need to know, some way I need to grow
to get out of this rut, God give me some self-trust
Love is somethin I'm lookin for but I've found it, or have I?
I wanna live but can I, or do I have to die to?
I try to, have life but my life seems kinda worthless
as I'm starin at this puddle
God I pray that you can give me a purpose or help me find it
Cause on this narrow path of self-damnation, I can't find it
Is it somethin I need to know, some way I need to grow
to get out of this rut, God please give me some self-trust
Love is somethin I'm lookin for - thought I found it, or have I?
I wanna live but can I, or do I have to die to?
I try to, have life but my life seems kinda worthless
as I'm starin in this puddle

[Chorus]

{*music changes*}

Verse 4
I sit alone in dismal silence
Peering into the eyes of my reflection
Wondering if his thoughts are adjacent to my own
What visions of eerie savagery
are passing if purity lurks in the mind of he who I mirror?
Lookin at him I am disgusted
He lacks beauty in all external areas
and internally he seems so confused
Perplexed with this conundrum of life
He proceeds to function or cope, lookin at it realistically
Esteem he lacks, in all areas of existance
Reason unknown
What is the cause of the lack of this self-acceptance?
I mean it seems like he needs constant assurance
Some type of ritual proof that he's even worth the oxygen he breathes
A, light that shines upon him
Is his living in vein? Does he have a purpose?
Answer - eternally unknown

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Both songs kind of depressing but I could really relate to them when my dp was at it's worst.

REHAB - "Scarecrow"

I am the everything the all knowing
The omnipotent one
I watch the fields I do not feel
I circumnavigate everyone
I am the scarecrow, alone and disconnected
You stare right past me undetected
I am only here when you expect it
And feel a sadness undescribable

I hang here motionless holding a bible
No revival
I died and became apathy
Then married vacancy
Then moved my children to the tundra of complacency
I do not exist in your world
I've burned the bridges, I've cut the life line
Now all I have left is my mind
Which judges all of you
Analyzes your dumb philosophies
In wonderment of how you all have ruined your ecology
But you do not hear for I am to you only but nothingness
And I can't understand why I'm the only one that feels like this

It's all p!ss, I flee
Out of all the people that have left me
The one I miss most, is me


I am the scarecrow and I am so alone

And I've seen thirty years of down time
The face of a clown, a stick for a spine
From a grandiose small town mind
And crows fly all around mine
They sh!t on my shoulder
I got no voice, no mobility
I get older, heated but colder
No yield in my field, flower* my opinion
I stare at your houses in the distance
Silent persistence at night windows glisten
I got nothing to say cause no one would listen anyway
So I remain against the grain
I've seen sunny days with rain
Busted knuckles and pain and never complained
Dirt is my domain, my view is plain
But I'm invisible, sound mystical
Not really, the days are dry the evening chilly
The only one who understands is little Billy when he's lonely
Make me feel something, make me worth a damn
Make me new again, make me a flower*in' man

Seen the rise and fall the high and low the come and go
And if you knew what I know, sometimes one does not reap what he sows
The wind blows, the moon glows the water flows
The rain turns to snow, and the ground is froze
And only God knows why that's the way it goes

I am the scarecrow and I am so alone

REHAB - "It Don't Matter"

Sittin in traffic another day of feeling nothing
Trying to find something I guess it's back to huffin'
Paint and model glue oh how I die when I look
At you smilin' lovin' life and all I know is blue
Rainy days and cold stares broken love affairs
Everything's beautiful as long as I ain't there
I guess I wasn't meant to crack a smile who cares
I think I'll go to sleep for a while now

I'm barely livin' in my skin depression's my only friend
And I don't know where I am heading tryin' to forget where I've been
And I'm so sick of lying God please show me that silver lining
Cuz I've heard tale and I'm not well my heads full of hell and
This world's a jail but


And it don't matter and I don't care
I let my pain into the air
Cuz everything good's over there
And everything here's hard to bear
And it don't matter and I don't care
I let my pain into the air
Cuz everything good's over there
And everything here's hard to bear

And as the pin begins to displace had it to ear level
With this place you see it on my face a state of suspended grace
Gradually I erase and find comfort in the sickest womb
I might be present but noone in the room
To whom it may consume melting ensembles bleeding chellos running through Bordellos drama
Like Othello hidin' out from Poncharello
Dead off in the Median
Fallin apart like usual handin' out flyers to my funeral

So they say that life's a play and that all the world's a stage
Then for another part I pray the show ends the same way everyday
And my heart carries the pain of a brain I can't explain
Am I insane
Am I insane


And it don't matter and I don't care
I let my pain into the air
Cuz everything good's over there
And everything here's hard to bear
And it don't matter and I don't care
I let my pain into the air
Cuz everything good's over there
And everything here's hard to bear

And everything good is gone
And everything good is gone
And everything good is gone
And everything bad is here
And everything bad is here
And everything bad is here
It doesn't really matter now does it

And it don't matter and I don't care
I let my pain into the air
Cuz everything good's over there
And everything here's hard to bear
And it don't matter and I don't care
I let my pain into the air
Cuz everything good's over there
And everything here's hard to bear
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