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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi,

I feel so sad and deseperate.... I feel totally out in control with meds. I really change every week, it's so bad for me, I can't help it, every med I take makes things worse.... I really want to ACCEPT the new med coming up... but I am so afraid it will make things worse again! I couldnt tought Effexor recently because I felt so drugged and dp r to the extream.... I toughed 2-3 days.. I am so stupid....Really.

I really am obsessed with meds, I really think all the time of them, and I realize it, but I can't help it, and my boyfriend is mean with me. He said yesterday that this med obsession would turn me crqzy and that I was becoming crazy! I HATE this word, I can't accept this worls. After he said t me he mean that this obsessino was crazy and not me, but I feel that I am becoming really crazy because I can't tought any med, and without med I am a mess, and I feel so derealized and depersonalised all the time, it freaks me!!!!!! I know I am obsessed with many things, this Internet included, and I know I must stop being too much on the Net, and I can't control myself! :(

I will see a new psychiatrist soon, and I hope he will be more strong than the one I see, who let me change every week. My boyfriend says I should be reasonable and trust myself and try a med and that is all, but I have tons of meds in my house (since 18 months) so I always think I am not on the good one for dp and dr. It's so pathetic. I am so desesperate.

I am tired to think ALL the time of dp and dr and meds, what is my problem? I was not silly before my pregnancy :(

I just want to end this misery sometimes... now I will take anti-obsessional med and I will stick with it. If you have any positive things to tell me please do, I am in a bad phase, and need to know I am not crazy just obsessive! PM me.

Cyn xxx
 

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cynthia...do yourself a favour and bin all the meds you have had over the last 18 months.....start your new med and give yourself a good few weeks to let them start to work.....you are not crazy.....there are alot of meds out there and not everyone suits every person....its all trail and error......just except that the first few days might be a bit rough while you adjust......and i will keep my fingers crossed for you that this one helps......we all obssess about something.....yours is the meds..... dont feel bad about that...we are all here to help each other :)
 
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
You might have chemical dependency, i suggest slowly comin off ur meds by lowering the dosage until u drop em completely, Talk to ur psychiatrist and stop obssessing over these medications. Thats y i personally dont beleive in them. Just relax everythin will be fine. :roll:
 

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Hey Cyn

I have noticed that St. John's Wort is very effective for my depression/anxiety/DP. You may want to try it as an alternative to what you are on now. Before taking it I was stuck in my house AFRAID to go out. Now I'm out all the time. Before you take it, it is VERY important that you give the other meds time to leave your system and talk to your shrink.

There have been many reports of it being more effective than SSRIs and MAOIs simply because there are no side effects other than an upset stomach if you take one without food or if you are allergic or combine it with other meds.

Remember that nothing will eliminate the DP other than self work in therapy, but the meds will help you move forward and get over some of the hills.

Hope this helps,

Ken
 

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YOU know that you are not crazy. You know you are just obsessive. You have said it in your post. You did it the other day. You focused outwards. Keep trying! Imagine we are all behind you! The dp cheerleaders!

You have to be able to tell yourself these things. Every time we reassure you, you need more! So I am contradicting myself by replying, but I find it so hard not to - I really sympathise with you and just want to tell you its going to be ok. It really is. Believe it - from yourself, not us!

Gxxx
 

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Cynthia,

I am right there with you. I have been in a horrible rut over the past week and a half.

Some things to know and remember about meds:

They NEED TIME. Very little meds will work right away. Most take several weeks before they are able to be effective. You have to give them time and you can't give up on them because you aren't seeing instant results.

All meds act different for different people. Meds have a different effect on everybody. You have to try a med, give it a chance and if you don't see any bit of results, then move on and try another. But you have to be patient and give things a chance as hard as it is.

I know you want a quick fix. I want it just as bad as you if not more. But we have to give things a chance. Hang in there, I am right there with you.
Take care,

Kelson
 
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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
kenc127 said:
Hey Cyn

I have noticed that St. John's Wort is very effective for my depression/anxiety/DP. You may want to try it as an alternative to what you are on now. Before taking it I was stuck in my house AFRAID to go out. Now I'm out all the time. Before you take it, it is VERY important that you give the other meds time to leave your system and talk to your shrink.

There have been many reports of it being more effective than SSRIs and MAOIs simply because there are no side effects other than an upset stomach if you take one without food or if you are allergic or combine it with other meds.

Remember that nothing will eliminate the DP other than self work in therapy, but the meds will help you move forward and get over some of the hills.

Hope this helps,

Ken
St Johns Wort and 5 htp helps, u shouldn't live your life like this! Try to see the bigger picture!
 
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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Dear one, your relationship with Meds is very complicated and specific to YOU (not going to find any advice that really addresses YOUR situation because you use meds, the IDEA of meds, in a very complex way)

Yes, you want the med to HELP you feel better, but that's only half the picture. You also feel like you MUST be medicated in order to control your impulses (we've talked about this, right?)

It's more for you than just Wanting medication to help you feel less anxious or dp'd. You are convinced you MUST have them in order to not lose control and do something awful.

When you're using the idea of medication as a kind of Self-Controlling Device, it all becomes more psychological than chemical. THAT is the stuff to talk about in therapy. The only way you're going to get past it is to talk THROUGH it, not keep searching for a better med to control you more efficiently.

Love,
J
 

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Cynthia, I hear from your post that your are very frightened and mixed up with all you feelings, the dp and the medications. I am in no way trying to tell you what to do because it really is something you should seek medical advice on when on medications. Here is something to give a bit of thought to. This is what I did when I felt that the medications were not helping me, I stopped all the medications I was on and let myself try and relax and think out what I wanted to do next. I realized that this was my mind and my body and I had to take care of it. I truly felt that using this medication and that medication was causing me to feel mixed up and not knowing how I the real me was feeling. It gave time for the real me to come back out. Now I know the anxiety is very upsetting and the dp/dr is very frightening but it is important to remember that sometimes these medications can make it feel worse. If one is going to use medications it is important to find a good caring doctor who takes the time with the medications to try and find one that may work for you. Changing frequently to me would not be a good thing.

I have been off the anti-depressants for a long time, I do however use a very small amount of ativan for sleep when needed. I still have the dp/dr but I am more alert and I know that what I am feeling is me not the me on medications. It is giving me time to see what shape I am really in. Since I have been off those meds I have functioned very well compared to before. I am able to keep my home emaculate like I always did, manage to cook again, go out with help of course. I have not been able to go out alone for a very long time, but someday hopefully I will be able to. I suffered a very severe case of dp/dr, anxiety and many physical problems from anorexia which landed me in hosptal for a long time. I worked hard to come home from hospital and have not returned for over four years. I did lose memory and had to basically relearn alot of things due to the extent of the breakdown but I am slowly coming back. I am singing again and I am able to spend a little time with others periodically.

The road is a rough one I know, it hurts right down to the bottom of your very soul, but you can do it you can get better or feel better than you are right now. You need to take some control back for you, like make some decisions regarding your meds and your health. It has been said here that nutrition is very important I agree. We need sleep, relaxation, good nutrition and exercise, we need to take care of our bodies and our minds. There is hope Cynthia you will get better, it may not happen right away but you can feel better than you are right now. Please remember the things I have said are what has worked for me on the road to being well, everyone is different. Step back for a moment and look at your situation and try and decide what is actually helping you and what is not helping you. I hope you feel a little better, always know there are people here who care and understand how you feel.

gem.
 
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