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today at thanksgiving made me sad, my parents like to talk a lot of stories about me and my girlfriend was there to so like a hundred more stories but my mom would be like mikey would make me laugh every day, he did this, did that, and im sitting here emotionless, like wow.. what has happend to me,

and it sucks, i think i have paranioa someone said, cus i feel like i give off bad vibes, wether its just major anxiety and im triggered by sounds, just were i am right now, i dont know how to figure it out

when i talk to people, its like im insulting them, and i could say 'how was ur day' and they react weird, like how i say it or the tone in my voice triggers this vibe of something.. i dont know

its like maybe im talking in statements, and people dont know what to say back

but i talk like that cus im trying to find my self again, i want to be able to talk from my heart, so when i talk, i do this weird thing i so far cant undo and it makes people offended

i dont know..

im taking medicine right now

kinda helps with that vibe thing, but sucks cus when i think in my head people around me cough, and my brother who is next door to me coughs like a motherfucker, like 10 times in a row and i just want to punch him in his fuckin head tell him to shut the fuck up, but of course i aint gonna do that

but how is it when i think in my head, people around me cough, even at grocery stores

and i give off this weird vibe

and when i speak to people i offend them

how was i this happy fun kid, and now i feel as if the world is better without me in it

i thought i was a person god could be proud of, of course i had my falls, and those falls r y i am here today

but i know deep down, on god, i am a good person

and i mean good as much as i can

unlike my brother who likes to watch me fail, and hates me deep down, yet i still root for him, and talk to him

but i would never wish any bad on him, like i think he would for me

and it sucks with this crazy ass anxiety, before this i felt like the hulk could walk in and i would fuck him up,

but now a sound of a sly could make me jump

and people take advantage of that

im a good person, but makes me mad that people think they could walk all over me, as if i wouldnt do anything

i truly feel i could WHOOP most these motherfuckers asses, i know i could, but they test me

and before this, i could just talk some shit and these pussies would go cry in a corner, its getting to the point ima have to slug these bitches in the face

y is it when im at my all time low, these people want to walk all over me, but before they were scared of me, and didnt even kno it, and i wasnt a dick about it either, i was probly one of the nicest people they'd ever meet

and still to this day i hold that with me, but its getting takin as a weakness..

anyways

if i could figure my symptoms out, i could get thru this

i give off weird vibes, when i talk i offend people when i dont mean it at all, i jump to sounds, and when i think people cough

someone please give me some advice to get thru this
 

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You sound a little angry at the world and at people. Try a way to let the anger out Man. Running/gym etc are a great way to let it out bro
 

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I feel the same way bro i swear it
 

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Been dealing with this for years, but it mostly stems from clinical depression for me.

I have those weird vibes too. It's as if people can just sense my insecurities and lack of confidence. People actually wanting to hang around me is a rarity and even when they do, they feel very uncomfortable just standing close. Even so, I'm an incredibly nice person (at least I think I am). I'm always thinking of other people and making sure those around me are happy first before myself. But even though I try my hardest to give happiness to others, people still think oddly of me and it really hurts my feelings.

Anyway, as for advice, I'm still struggling with this myself. I try to remember that I'm a good person and have a great heart. I guess it shouldn't matter what others think as long as I'm making a positive impact on those around me, even if they can't appreciate it fully. Maybe you could come clean and just mention how they make you feel. It might help to clear up any assumptions they might have about you by just stating exactly what you wrote here (minus the hitting your brother part, haha). It might help them understand you better, which might be the reason why this situation is happening in the first place.

Hope your holidays were good otherwise, mate! :cool:
 
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