i went to ny city on saturday and it just felt like i wasn't there. i was walking, people seemed fake, everyone. it was the most horrible time in new york. a week before smoking pot with my friends i wen't to a knicks game and had a great time, and everything seemed so whole and wonderful, i wish it can get back to that stage, but i am seeing no signs of improvement. this freaking nitemare i can't get out of, and i don't feel comfortable in my own skin, i want to get out of this body. its killing me.