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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
It’s currently 3:15am, I’m writing this to take my mind off what just happened. I went bed around 1:20am. About 5 weeks ago I did weed for the last time. Due to the fact it gave me dpdr, completely diagnosed by a doctor, got medication and this week i’ve Felt notably different, better, normal even. I go to sleep with a dry mouth and a crave for water but can simply not be bothered to get up, go upstairs and get water from the kitchen, so I leave it and just go to sleep. I’ve had sleep paralysis before but always about meaningless things, such as when I fell out with a friend it was them bullying me and I could not wake up, or being in an uncomfortable suituation. It hasn’t occurred it about 4 months so I thought maybe it had just stopped for me. Never had the two clashed before. I’m at my grandparents house right now and they live on the top floor, two flights of stairs up. At first I thought it was real life, it was actually happening. My head hurt 100x more than a migraine if I had to describe it, it felt like someone was controlling/trying to figure out which parallel universe I should go to, one or the other and my head was being pushed into either one, over and over again. I get out of bed, stuck in the duvet (quilt) and leave it on the floor. I walk into the kitchen to get water and notice my nans house is different, as if I’m in a parallel universe and i’ve noticed. It looks like her old house was 10 years ago. Of course late at night:early in the morning my grandparents are asleep. I see them both sitting on their old sofas with my uncle Richard who I touch to see if he’s real. It felt real touching him, like actual human contact not sleep paralysis. He continues to say “you’re finally up, you better not have left your duvet on the floor like last time” which i’ve never done? I realise that I’m in sleep paralysis at this point. I need to wake up and get out of this headspace/mindset because I genuinely think i’ll be stuck here forever. I can feel my body crying and my cheeks getting wet but I can’t touch my face, I can’t move. I can feel my neck getting wet from my tears but I can’t take off my top as I’m stuck in place. Which takes us to now, i’ve just woken up and felt the need to write it down someplace safe where I could get advice before I forget. I’m scared to go back to sleep. I’m scared to go into the kitchen to get a drink finally incase I see the old furniture, my uncle and grandparents sitting on the sofa acting as if I’m a freak. I know i’ll be fine, i’ve Woken up and writing this has settled me down massively. This wasn’t just a dream, yes people can imagine things like this when dreaming but when you wake up with a drenching wet neck from tears and your body shaking you know it’s something different. I’ve never been so terrified in my life. I don’t want to move. If anyone can relate in anyway please respond. I could really use someone to talk to right now or in the foreseeable future.
 

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Can't relate. I can BUMP this.

But it doesn't really sound like either but I am no doctor, can only tell you what i've been through.

But i had sleep paralysis many many times in my life, you jump or something and you wake up and you can't move, i mean even if you try your hardest, you can't move an inch, you are froze, you fight it as hard as you can and as i said, you just can't move. This is a very simple defence mechanism that is when you are half dreaming and half awake, you can create it actually, i've studied it a little.

So say you were on the edge of the cliff in a tent, you wake up needing to pee, in the middle of the night, often this will kick in or even not needing to pee, to stop you simply walking off the cliff, I am no expert at all, but nothing here really strikes me hard as either DP or Sleep Paralysis, DP can be many things, so sure, maybe, check the common symptoms, which is listed under 'new people start here' or something, you'll find it. Sleep Paralysis, check the symptoms, as I had it for ages and i'd wake up and i could not talk or move, it was impossible so hmmmm, your story doesn't mark anything I (that's CAPS) went through, not saying it's not, but hmmmmm... not what i'd think of the disorder as having lived it. Also you feel normal as you say (a lot i am guessing)

In saying that, i am 50/50, some of it sounds very heavy stress created anxiety. But I'm not a doctor, so you know, but you sound very overwhelmed, the anxiety is clear to read from that simple message.

DR maybe?

parallel universe

nans house is different

Honestly you need to de stress and see, not add stress, i'd address that first for sure, you seem very over worked
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I have depersonalisation from cannabis 5 weeks back, I didn’t go into details just as it has been wearing off, but I felt like I was a pair of eyes walking and I felt a disconnect to my body constantly, I felt uncomfortable around family members as if I’d just met them and didn’t know what to say, I saw little consequence in major things such as committing a crime, I feel like I’m free and prison isn’t real ? That having a stable job isn’t important because life isn’t real, reality. As I said it’s calm down a bit this last week which is why tonight is such a shock for me. Thankyou for your help I really appreciate it, I went to get a glass of water 20 minutes ago and it took 10 minutes to even look into the front room incase my uncle was sitting there.
 

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HMMMM. I wouldn't listen to me. I am just reaching out, not a diagnoses.

Yeah trigger is normal. But disconnect yeah DP, uncomfortable, yeah DP. Your consequence is because you don't feel like it's you, so why worry about that, but just listen to the true self and keep yourself grounded in life, as them things will come back. SO don't do anything you wouldn't dream of or that is wrong.

You are having a few personal questions of life and reality, it happened all of us, just think twice for a while, no point regretting things man that can be avoided. You are real and actions are very real.

BUT your last line sums it all FOR ME. You are scared man, you are anxious, would you worry about your uncle a few months ago to get a glass of water? hell no, if yes well that's a different problem, but anxiety is controlling your life now...
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I agree with you and I’m so grateful you’ve responded to me, I do thoroughly appreciate it. I think researching things has made things worse for me. Researching John Titor and his theory of time travel and parrallel universes has just reinenforced a sense of uncertainty about life for me. I don’t know where to go from here as nobody in my personal life apart from one friend and the doctor believes me. I haven’t told my family, when I told my mother I was experiencing sleep paralysis about a year about she claimed that when I read something online I suddenly assume I have it and I was just seeking attention. I gave up telling family stuff after that encounter. Thankyou again
 
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