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Sexuality and Dp/Dr

2895 Views 14 Replies 8 Participants Last post by  totallifetransformation
Dear All,

I can't stop thinking about my sexuality and I think a core part of that anxiety is driving my horrendous DP and DR.

I keep worrying that I am gay or bisexual, and I cannot accept that under any circumstances whatsoever.

I need to make this thread because I am so depressed about it.
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Yeah its complicated man. I have sexual addiction and ended up one horrible night, having sex with a transgendered escort.

It's fucked me up since then because if I think about them, say, compared to "normal" women, then I get more of a "high" and an arousal-kick from the transgendered stuff.

But the whole thing feels extremely confusing, gross and suicide-inducing because i literally cannot take this anymore.
Yeah, but the c*** bothers me. That's what caused all the problems. Okay she might be a woman, but what implications does it have for me?

It's cray man.

Sorry to be graphic but I have to be honest.
Also, if I see pictures when they were guys, I feel sick.

Fully expecting to be gunned down here for homophobia or whatever. I don't obviously condone being abusive or horrible to these people.
i wanted to bring this threed up again. for sure this has caused my dp or been the biggest factor.

i feel sick, sick, sick about this. it's honestly making me want to kill myself. difference is total life, is that i've actually had sexual contact with the opposite sex and you haven't.

i hate myself everyday for doing that and want to destroy my own brain for my sex addiction taking me there. WHY ddi this have to happen. i have started naltrexone but i can't tolerate it. i can try another med and see if i can basically strip away my libido.

at just 24 years old this is a fucking tragedy. its just makes me want to cry and cry.
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