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Severe memory loss very scared..

416 Views 2 Replies 2 Participants Last post by  lostinmind
Hey there, for a long time now i've been wandering around with the Depersonalization Disorder (since i was 8 or 10 to be exact) no surprise there. However, things have taken a dark turn lately, from the point of me having these panic attacks more often to the point of now having severe memory loss, sort of like a "linger" effect from the last attack that happened about 5 ish~ days ago. Never before have i felt this way after a panic attack regarding my DPD in any way, this is most likely the first time, i don't know what's going on, but i am sure as hell scared what will happen to me in the future, i remember what my name is, where i live and the people around me (along with those whom i got to know throughout the years), unfortunately however the attacks still happen and my memory keeps getting worse by each passing attack, for example: if i try to remember things i don't exactly recall doing (or even let's say, a game i played) i will sort of get a "post-trigger" that will spook me even more for some reason, as if it doesen't want me to try and remember or even build up my memory the way it was before..

I have no idea what's going on, but ever since this "lingering" effect i've been feeling alot more worse with each passing day, another example is, i have an Iphone 4s, i've downgraded it to IOS 6.1.3, but if i try and look at it even once the menu that is, i will get an instant panic attack and my memory will go blank once more. It's aburd! Not only is it frightening me but it's also making me very worried it will be permanent unless i do something :( i need your advice! i want to recover asap and move on with my life the way it used to be.. These thoughts are very frightening and only place i could go for now is here, i don't have an appointment until next week 10th. (or was it 11th?... i can't remember!!)

ANY advice would be deeply appreciated.. :(

P.S. i do sit around the computer alot, have ben since i was 8 or so, but these attacks happen eitherway even if i have been off the computer for a long time.
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Hey! Thank you so much for your response it really puts me at ease.. And thank you once more for the welcome! This place seems friendly enough :]

I have tried, and several times, in the past to stay away from the computer but the panic attacks kept on happening, i guess i need to keep trying since those were merley days (up to 3 maximum haha..) and i spend time outside rarley anyways which could be a even bigger problem :/

As for the therapist, not quite, i have made an appointment for one and will go in given date, i am still confused wether it is 10th or 11th.. Eitherway, these memory blockages are very very scary in my oppinion :s the way you described it is exactly how it goes in my head, sort of like a "mental barrier" to which doesen't allow me to reach a certain point in remembering..

My eating habbit isn't that great either, which might be a problem aswell, i rarley eat any food that has iron in it, I.E meat or fish or even others, i haven't had an orange, banana or even an apple in ages, i guess i should start slowly from the top and work my way down hah..

I should have mentioned i have had a pretty traumatizing childhood too ranging from home to school, not my best years i will tell you :/ but i will try your suggestions and see where they lead, let's just hope these panic attacks won't happen anymore.. they occur, strangely enough, regardless of what i do even if i am not on the computer..

But nonthenless, i hope your suggestions will work out for me, i am so grateful people out there are willing to help! :]
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