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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Does anyone go through really bad times of severe depression? Like nothing makes you happy? Right now I have little appetite, am constantly sleepy, always dehydrated, nothing makes me happy or excited, I don't want to talk to anyone, I have no emotions, etc.

Just in case anyone asks. I am currently on 50mg of Zoloft and see a psychiatrist every week.

This shit scares me to death.

Kelson
 

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Yep. While I'm loathe to admit (or recognise) that I suffer from Depression, I feel pretty much the same way as you do mate, pretty much all the time. It's crap. I feel so tired by it all. And now we've put the clocks back, I go to work in the dark, and come home in the dark, after being frazzled by flourescent lighting and staring at a PC all day. Great. :shock:
 

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Ditto, Kelson you're not alone. I'm also diagnosed with depression. I always say, I don't believe DP/DR come in a vacuum, they bring other "friends" along.

I have days where I can barely function. I've had months where I can barely function. The problem is, the DP/DR are the extra kick in the head. The "no pay back for even trying".

Try to work with your doctor w/meds. Also, I loathe to say this, but exercise helps me. And you really need a buddy for that if you can find anyone. Regular exercise.

Who knows, your primary disorder may be depression. I can't figure any of this out anymore. Some here are panic attack people, others are GAD, I think some of us have bad depression, etc., etc.

You are far from alone.
I'm sick of this too.
Best,
D
 
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Hi there,
I think we all go through our dark days, so don't worry you certainly arent alone here. 50mgs of Zoloft may not be enough. If that doesn't do it, "Coop" may be right, Zoloft may not be the right RX for you.

I wish you well,

Tony
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks for the replies. I honestly don't know how much longer I can take this. I feel like utter hell. I've tried other meds before. Zoloft worked at times, but there are other times where it doesn't work. I was on 200mg, but have tappered down slowly with my doctor's help, because it zaps any sexual wants, etc. Plus, I'm just not a very big fan on meds. I just don't like the idea of crap messing with our brains, etc. when in essence the doctors don't even know if they are gonna work.

I do have my ups and downs. For example, I was feeling pretty depression free for almost a month, but over the last week and a half it was been utter hell. Sure the ups are obviously nice, but the downs make the ups feel non-exsistent.

And Dreamer, I do exercise regularly and have pretty much my entire life. I've always been in good physical shape. I also eat healthy, drink alot of water, and usually get pretty decent, though dream interuppted, sleep.

I just get overwhelmed thinking about trying another med. Getting off this one, starting on a new one, waiting to see if it has any effects. If it doesn't then I will have to taper off that one and am back to square one. I just don't know what to do. It's all so frustrating and just wish it would just stop. No one deserves to live like this. NO ONE!

Kelson
 

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Hey Kelson. Sounds like you're not having the best of times right now. I know what it's like having ups only to come crashing back down again.

I also agree on the meds question - I never wanted to try any, and didn't really apart from the odd benzo here and there.

I think each case is specific, and you have to really work out what's causing your depression in your own particular case. It could be any number of things. Perhaps you don't have enough that's rewarding in your life - like sports, hobbies...anything you pursue and can develop yourself and your self-esteem in doing. It could be to do with your job, how satisfied with where you are in your life etc. Or it might simply be due to how you view yourself as a person.

You may not even need a therapist to work out what the cause here is, but have a think and see if you can come up with any ideas.
 

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not all meds are bad.

there... i said it. :shock:

i was on the verge of suicide and after a year on wellbutrin im not at that place in my life anymore. maybe try that if you havent already. i also made alot of personal, and lifestyle changes that really helped. the most positive change with the best results for me was my dietary change. go to http://ravediet.com/ and order the EATING dvd. i call it the red pill. once you watch it there is no going back. the #1 side effect of the rave diet they list on the site is HAPPINESS. :)
 
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I know where you are coming from you feel like if you permantly go to sleep it would be better for yourself and everyone involved in your life. It 's hard to connect with the rest of the world and staying away from everyone feels the safest way to cope with it. I almost killed myself a few times. When I felt like this ( fairly often in my life) the thing that's kept me around is to think how this would affect my familly and friends because it didn't help when people said things will get better. Just good old guilt. They would get better but I know that it usually came back( depression) again. One day at a time. Get out and do something that will take you out of that headspace. I started doing Search and Rescue. It keeps me entertained courses, pratices, searches. I didn't have to worry about socializing just too much activity. Go do something that keeps you interested. Hang in there.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Again, thanks for the advice. I just don't know. I'm just so horribly depressed and just have this scared feeling in my head for everything I think of and do. It's really pure, utter hell. Yesterday I slept from 2pm-midnight...woke up for a bit...and then went back to sleep from 1am-7am. Un-freakin-real. And the thing is...I didn't want to get up at 7am to go to work. It's like no matter what I do, I'm depressed. The only thing that really talks me out of ending it all is my family and friends and the hopes that it will get better again.

I don't feel like trying another med, cause none have worked up to this point. I just am not excited about anything in life. Not even the smallest thing. And it's horrible. Being awake is utter hell.

I just hope it gets better one day.

Kelson
 

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I know exactly how you are feeling. I have a 5 year old and I really have to push myself hard to take care of her basic needs which so far I have been able to. I may feel horrible all the time and all day but I know the day I cant get out of bed to do things for her is the day I am really going to lose it.
I dont even feel love for her how horrid is that??Shes such a good kid. I used to LOVE watching her and being part of her life. Now its all I can do to get her ready for school.
I am normally such a ''normal'' happy person. I have no problems so thats why I cant understand why I cannot enjoy a single thing any more.
I think it has to do with the beginning of winter this time. I have been through a few bouts of long depressions in my life but this one has been lasting the longest.
I never took medication for it. I havent even gone to a therapist. I sometimes wish I could but not only do I not have the money, I cant turn to my fantastic husband and say I am depressed for no reason because there IS not reason but this horrid feeling all the time.
I AM doing alot better than I was a few weeks ago. I try to take it one day at a time. I try to get out FORCE myself, not easy cause I also have a bit of agoraphobia when I get like this.

Hang in there, it will pass. I am counting on my strenght to keep me in tact. Things hopefully will change for you and you can look back and say to yourself..''wow, what was I thinking then??''
Keep busy and dont think ''I should be feeling happy about this? why am I not?'' it makes you more anxious. Channel your thoughts to what you are doing not how you should or shouldnt be feeling. That helps me.

I totally can relate to how you are feeling.
 

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I feel the same. I get so low it's frightening, but whenever I start to plan suicide I always think about my mum and it stops me from doing it. I'm only alive for my family. I've had times where I've gone to bed at 6pm just to avoid the rest of the day and how I'm feeling. I used to wake up in the mornings crying. I'm on sjw now which really works for me, and I haven't reached those lows since I've been on it.
I know what you mean when you say being awake is hell. Do you get affected by the weather? I'm afraid about how I'll get through the winter. Last night I had really bad vertigo type thing for 4 hours. I felt like I was tumbling backwards through space and it wouldn't stop.
But just remember that nothing is permanent and things will improve.
 
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Winters tough! When I look back through these periods of depression almost always it's November or Jan-March. Where I live it gets darker earlier and tons of rain. Gloomy. I call it hibernation time. Right now I'm sitting here when I had planned on going to the gym. It's not the exercise I dread it's leaving the house. I have a 5 and 7 year old and it's difficult being there for them . I just go though the motions. Emotionally gone. I'm trying a sun lamp see how it goes. Read, read, read.

Everybody hang in there.
 

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Hey Kelson,
Two of your symptoms may be from being on an antidepressant - constantly sleepy and dry mouth. Let your doctor know if those occurred after you began taking them.

Peace
Homeskooled
 
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when the depression sets in, IT REALLY SETS IN

its like right now I don't want to live but I don't want to die

i just feel so miserable and weird

why can't it just stop
 
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