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It's really weird just watching a person live a life whilst being trapped inside it isn't it? I'm sat in this vessel not believing i'm doing these normal things like going to work when why would I? Because I doubt whether this is the real world and surely that doubt would prevent me from doing everyday things.

I keep telling myself this is the real world and there's no other world I can be in. Yet I don't believe it. And don't quite want to in a way as what if I am in a fake world and I need to get back to the right one? There's one voice telling me I have always been here and must accept that, and another telling me that I shouldn't because this isn't the real me or the real world.

So am I self sabotaging myself or do I truly believe these things?
 

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I understand that... I think it is partly reality testing and partly self sabotage as you are almost afraid to let go of the idea in case it’s true. Does that make sense or feel like it may be true?
 
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