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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi. I know I said I would stop posting on this forum, but I could really use some tips/advice.

I'm really trying to do better in life, as dpdr has made everything fall apart. The major thing that has been affected is school and my education. I have a super hard time getting myself to school, which has lead me to stop talking to my friends and also not getting everything I need from classes to get good grades.

Now I really really really want to be able to go to school, but I'm scared to death. I'm so scared that I'll have a "dpdr attack" where I feel a total loss of control and understanding of what's happening around me. I know exactly how it'll go and how hard it will be, it terrifies me. But I'm only 17, and I have to get education, I want to be able to go to school.

Does anyone have any tips to get myself to school? The whole idea of going in, and having to face my classmates and the intense feeling of dpdr, it's just too much for me:(

I need something to cling onto when I'm at school so I don't have a full on panic attack. I'd be so grateful for any tips! Something to calm me down when I feel like I'm gonna break at any point.
 

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Hey, I’m 17 too and I know how it feels. You just gotta live through it, remember that even if this feeling is shitty, you will still make it and come out even better and more alive than before. If it makes you feel better, connect with people. Talk to your teachers, friends, or text/call someone on the phone. Eventually the feeling won’t be so strong and you wil be able to recover. Practice breathing techniques and keep in mind that school isn’t something very serious, you just gotta test yourself and learn at your own space. If you feel stressed - take a break, watch a movie. You will pull out of this eventually, trust me.
 

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I remember having to leave the classroom and go to the men's room for a few minutes. It might happen a few times every school week.

The fear was just unmanageable, and I was never really able to adjust to it. It never got old. Somehow I managed to finish my last year

and a half of high school. My grades plummeted from top 1/10th to barely a B student. 40 years later I got an EEG which showed I had

been suffering from an epileptic syndrome. My dp/dr attacks were focal temporal lobe seizures. Wish I had known that earlier.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Hey, I'm 17 too and I know how it feels. You just gotta live through it, remember that even if this feeling is shitty, you will still make it and come out even better and more alive than before. If it makes you feel better, connect with people. Talk to your teachers, friends, or text/call someone on the phone. Eventually the feeling won't be so strong and you wil be able to recover. Practice breathing techniques and keep in mind that school isn't something very serious, you just gotta test yourself and learn at your own space. If you feel stressed - take a break, watch a movie. You will pull out of this eventually, trust me.
Thanks! This was honestly the best answer I could get lol. I'll try and get myself to go to school tomorrow, hopefully it'll go well now that I've got some tips:) appreciate it a lot!
 

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Remember, don’t get upset or disappointed if the feeling persists for a week or a month right after I told you my tips. You have to live your life like DP isn’t here, despite it seeming impossible. As long as you keep up that mindset, you will help your brain adapt to your surroundings and put you less and less out of this “extreme” feeling.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Remember, don't get upset or disappointed if the feeling persists for a week or a month right after I told you my tips. You have to live your life like DP isn't here, despite it seeming impossible. As long as you keep up that mindset, you will help your brain adapt to your surroundings and put you less and less out of this "extreme" feeling.
Hi! Yeah I've totally understood by now that there's no use getting your hopes up too much lol. Update: I went to school and it was like the worst day ever, pure torture. But at least I did it! Tried to think about what people have told me on here, it helped a ton even though I felt like shit. Still thank you so much:)
 

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I don’t enjoy school either, but returning home after a hard day of work helps me relax and feel better.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
I don't enjoy school either, but returning home after a hard day of work helps me relax and feel better.
Oh yeah that kind of the weird part about this day. 3 hours of school was just misery for me, but the second I got into the car I felt great. I would even say that the dpdr disappeared for an hour or so, super strange. I think that's just a proof that this is anxiety and nothing else. I feel so unsafe and anxious and scared in school, no wonder the dpdr goes up like crazy. Then I get into the car and suddenly the "danger is over", that's when I feel great. Ngl tho I'm gonna look into meds or something for this anxiety, because I don't think it's normal feeling THAT bad going into school.
 

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Oh, I see. I once recovered from my DPD without any meds, I just took care of the anxiety in a natural way. Whenever my anxiety started to rise I would just start to think more and more about that specific thought until I don’t feel anxious about it, basically begging for anxiety on purpose. Managing your breathing also helps. If you really believe meds will help you then you can go for it, but just be careful with them, don’t get addicted or anything. Stay healthy! ????
 

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Oh, I see. I once recovered from my DPD without any meds, I just took care of the anxiety in a natural way. Whenever my anxiety started to rise I would just start to think more and more about that specific thought until I don't feel anxious about it, basically begging for anxiety on purpose. Managing your breathing also helps. If you really believe meds will help you then you can go for it, but just be careful with them, don't get addicted or anything. Stay healthy! ????
wow youre so positive. great! i love positive people with this disorder.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Oh, I see. I once recovered from my DPD without any meds, I just took care of the anxiety in a natural way. Whenever my anxiety started to rise I would just start to think more and more about that specific thought until I don't feel anxious about it, basically begging for anxiety on purpose. Managing your breathing also helps. If you really believe meds will help you then you can go for it, but just be careful with them, don't get addicted or anything. Stay healthy! ????
You know what, I've actually decided to not take any meds! I haven't spoken to my psychiatrist or anything about it yet, but I do want to take care of this anxiety as much as I can myself. I'm not gonna lie I'm a bit scared of meds seeing how much they can change you and affect you, so I would prefer it if I didn't have to go that way. Then it's also terrifying that I'd have to get off them after a while, what if that goes total shit? Idk I'm just trying to be careful like you said:) thanks a lot for the positive response!
Although I don't think "thinking more and more about the anxiety" will help me that much, that's sort of what I'm struggling with. I keep obsessing over the feeling so the feeling gets more and more intense. But we're all different, I'm glad it worked for you! Wishing you all the best:)
 

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Oh, I did not mean to obsess over it, simply face the anxiety and just let all of it out, think questions like. “How bad is my anxiety?” “How likely is this and that going to happen?” “Do I really believe all of this?” And so on, thus making your thoughts seem like a lesser deal. This method helped me a lot and all the best wishes to you back!:)
 

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Oh, I did not mean to obsess over it, simply face the anxiety and just let all of it out, think questions like. "How bad is my anxiety?" "How likely is this and that going to happen?" "Do I really believe all of this?" And so on, thus making your thoughts seem like a lesser deal. This method helped me a lot and all the best wishes to you back!:)
Ohhh right gotcha! I remember recommending that on here, better start using my own advice lol:)
 

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I know how it feels.

Just keep showing up to your classes and it'll eventually get less scarier. Once you start skipping it gets even harder and scarier to go back. For 2 months this school year I had bad panic attacks and didn't show up to class, so, I'm in a similar situation right now. Talk to your teachers about the anxiety/ dpdr, I'm sure they'll understand and be more lenient towards you, it made me feel a lot more safer when I told my teachers what i was going through. Regarding grades; I talked to my guidance counselor and vice principle and they gave me a "medical" grade in place of the F's I received. If you go to school in the U.S, a 504 plan could also help with getting extended time on assignments. You've given great advice on here so now you just gotta apply it to yourself.

Hang in there, it's going to be alright.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
I know how it feels.

Just keep showing up to your classes and it'll eventually get less scarier. Once you start skipping it gets even harder and scarier to go back. For 2 months this school year I had bad panic attacks and didn't show up to class, so, I'm in a similar situation right now. Talk to your teachers about the anxiety/ dpdr, I'm sure they'll understand and be more lenient towards you, it made me feel a lot more safer when I told my teachers what i was going through. Regarding grades; I talked to my guidance counselor and vice principle and they gave me a "medical" grade in place of the F's I received. If you go to school in the U.S, a 504 plan could also help with getting extended time on assignments. You've given great advice on here so now you just gotta apply it to yourself.

Hang in there, it's going to be alright.
Hi! Yeah thanks so much for the advice. I've always been a bit scared to tell my teachers because I don't want them to treat me differently than the others in my class, or look at me like I can't do anything. But I guess in this situation it would be necessary, they're all really nice tho so I'm sure they'll understand. It's just me who hates looking vulnerable. I don't live in the US but I'm sure there's some way to fix my grades anyways, it's not that bad that I've gotten F's yet, but if it does I'll make sure to fix it.

I was pretty excited (also terrified lol) to start going to school now and work on this, but now it's closing down again due to COVID:( I mean sure it gives me time to make up a plan and work on the dpdr, but like you said when you skip it for a few weeks, it's so much more terrifying going back again. I'll try and challenge myself anyways and go out, ride the subway etc, hopefully that'll make it easier to get back to school.

Again, thanks for the encouragement and advice!:)
 

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Hi! Yeah thanks so much for the advice. I've always been a bit scared to tell my teachers because I don't want them to treat me differently than the others in my class, or look at me like I can't do anything. But I guess in this situation it would be necessary, they're all really nice tho so I'm sure they'll understand. It's just me who hates looking vulnerable. I don't live in the US but I'm sure there's some way to fix my grades anyways, it's not that bad that I've gotten F's yet, but if it does I'll make sure to fix it.

I was pretty excited (also terrified lol) to start going to school now and work on this, but now it's closing down again due to COVID:( I mean sure it gives me time to make up a plan and work on the dpdr, but like you said when you skip it for a few weeks, it's so much more terrifying going back again. I'll try and challenge myself anyways and go out, ride the subway etc, hopefully that'll make it easier to get back to school.

Again, thanks for the encouragement and advice!
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Omg yeah, my main problem was my teachers and classmates viewing me as a dumb student/ failure, all my self worth used to be determined by my grades. Definitely tell your teachers at least about anxiety. You're in your last year of high school I think? They'll have to be a bit more forgiving. Good luck!
 

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Omg yeah, my main problem was my teachers and classmates viewing me as a dumb student/ failure, all my self worth used to be determined by my grades. Definitely tell your teachers at least about anxiety. You're in your last year of high school I think? They'll have to be a bit more forgiving. Good luck!
Yeah that's exactly how I feel! I even have a hard time telling my parents because I don't want them to tip-toe around me and constantly ask if I'm alright. At the same time that's exactly what I want, haha it's really weird. Also don't want my teachers to think I want their pity, I really just need more time. I'm 17 and I think I would be in 11 grade in the US. Here where I live next year will be my last before I start university. The 2nd year out of 3 here is usually the hardest one, which is why I'm struggling a lot. I've already missed a lot of tests, I'll try and get it together after Christmas!

Also, are you still in school?
 

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Yeah that's exactly how I feel! I even have a hard time telling my parents because I don't want them to tip-toe around me and constantly ask if I'm alright. At the same time that's exactly what I want, haha it's really weird. Also don't want my teachers to think I want their pity, I really just need more time. I'm 17 and I think I would be in 11 grade in the US. Here where I live next year will be my last before I start university. The 2nd year out of 3 here is usually the hardest one, which is why I'm struggling a lot. I've already missed a lot of tests, I'll try and get it together after Christmas!

Also, are you still in school?
Same here, I've always excelled at schoolwork so it was also out of my comfort zone asking my teachers for more time and explaining my situation. I was surprised when they were willing to help me out. I still can't really tell my parents about things either, but I made myself open up to my teachers. I'm in 12th grade, it's my last year until university. The 2nd to last year of school seems to be the hardest everywhere haha. With covid, everyones a bit more stressed, I'm sure your teachers will understand. Don't feel guilty about asking for more time. You'll get through this, wishing you all the best.
 
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