[enigma]

...in the entire history of the human race.

I'll begin:

Help me glue my feet to the cat

 

[mcsiegs]

In the words of George Carlin (who included a similar skit in his routine once):

"As soon as I shove this hot poker up my a**, I am going to chop my di*k off"

 

[enigma]

In the words of George Carlin (who included a similar skit in his routine once):

Actually that was my inspiration for this ("Please saw my legs off" was another of his).

Would you like tar with that?

 

[mcsiegs]

As soon as the TV tars and feathers me, I am going outside with the radio to wash the dog.

 

[enigma]

Doorknobs are chewy

 

[mcsiegs]

This thread is giving me a hell of a laugh...I hope others join in. It's so fun to let your mind free-flow words.

"As I walked across my legs, the dog managed to throw a football to an angry neighbor"

 

[Ben]

Depersonalization makes one hung like a horse.

 

[enigma]

But it's magic diarrhea

 

[Ben]

I have found that high anxiety typically comes from prose symmetric chess syndication. And so in order to keep the flies from eating my soup I try to coagulate the cheese surrounding the stratosphere of my own pocket lint; which, in the end, prevents me from seeing the reflection of my own olive.

 

[Ben]

....I have a question for anyone on this board but Janine Baker.

 

[enigma]

My breath is gelatinous

 

[Ben]

Now where did I put my cod piece?

 

[mcsiegs]

Rolled up salami in a dirty ashtray is a regular staple of the Smith family. You know, the family that eats irons and sh*ts pressed shirts.

 

[enigma]

He sure belts out great tunes on that octopus!

 

[Ben]

....I tell ya folks, it harder than it looks: It's a long way to the top if you wanna rock 'n' roll......

 

[Guest]

My ice cream is on the dirty frog.

 

[mcsiegs]

MrMole - I can always count on you to make me laugh. Between your avitar and the frog comment, I got in a real good laugh.

Ok - the next group of words with no meaning:

"Lying in a mixture of staples and beer will make even the tallest of men cry foul after a gutter ball"

 

[Guest]

Mmmmmm....Margaret Thatcher

 

[enigma]

Spinal fluid daiquiris are definitely my beverage of choice!

 

[terri*]

" Here Honey, take my checkbook and Visa and spend it all. When you get thru with that, here's my 401K account numbers."

( I've certainly never heard that! )