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Road to recovery

3021 Views 10 Replies 6 Participants Last post by  Phantasm
Hi all. I have not visited this website in years, however, as I sat here on the couch I remembered frequenting this site constantly about 5 years ago. I am at a point where i might not say that I'm cured, but my life is back to normal. Nothing that used to keep me up at night or make me suffer related to DP/DR affects me anymore. It's not that i don't feel somewhat chronically detached to a degree, it's moreso that it does not bother me at all and my symptoms have alleviated significantly. If i took a step back and asked myself, do i still feel DP/DR? The answer would be: A little bit. This however is not something that should depress you because as i said earlier, I am not bothered by it at all anymore.

I suffered from DP/DR horribly back in 2013. I will spare you the story but i had a panic attack and my dp/dr got worse and worse for the next year or so. I have been to the depths of hell with this and at my lowest point i was inconsolable on all fours in my bedroom pounding the ground and begging god to make it stop. I know how some of you feel. It was and will always be the most terrifying thing i have ever experienced in my life. I come back to this website hoping to educate and inspire rather than bringing you more fear and self doubt. I know that when I was in the deepest depths of DP/DR i would read these and feel nothing but jealousy and hopelessness. I am not claiming that I have the "cure" or that I know what worked for me will work for you. I simply can not know that. I can tell you that I have extreme confidence that my advice can only serve to improve your mental state and maybe eventually lead you to where I am at now.

If you are anything like me, the reason that you continue to suffer is because you are desperately trying to control everything. Be honest with yourself.. How long have you spent today plotting and thinking about how you want to rid yourself of this ailment? Probably way too much. The cause of your suffering is because of this. Let go. You need to be able to get to a point where fears don't hijack your brain all day like it used to do with me. Plant yourself in reality and do whatever it takes to take your mind off of DP (No drugs/alcohol). When a fear or thought enters your mind that is unpleasent, or if you start thinking about DP, accept those fears and go back to what you were doing. That sounds vague I know so I will provide you with an example. Say you are sitting down watching tv and you start to think about how terrified you are of living with this for the rest of your life, what you should do it tell your brain "Let it happen". When you do this you take the fear away from the thought. It becomes acceptance. You have no other reason to continue to think about it as you have already accepted the worst case scenario.

My process to recovery was extremely gradual. There was no aha moment where my symptoms just dissipated. I was in hell for close to two and a half years before I started to ignore DP. One day you realize that your symptoms are still there, but they don't hold power over you anymore. Then a little later on you realize that the symptoms are not as bad anymore and they have even less power over you. Do not expect to just wake up one morning and it all be gone. This mindset is part of the reason we suffer. Let go of expectations and dive head first into your life and do not look back.

I would like to offer you a concise set of instructions however that I believe can only benefit you.The meat and potatoes of what I want to tell you is this: read this post, distract yourself and do whatever you can that will keep you from thinking about DP/DR/anxiety, and accept the fears the come across your mind.

This ailment is anxiety. Nothing more, nothing less. It serves absolutely no benefit to believe otherwise. Do not fall in the rabbit hole of trying to conduct self psychotherapy on yourself or watch videos like the ones by harris harrington or whatnot. Also, it is my own personal belief that you should stop coming to this website. I understand that this website can be therapeutic and provide a support group for those in need, so if you disagree with me then thats fine but I personally feel that checking this website every hour will only cause you to think about your condition which is the exact opposite of what i recommend doing.

I will preemptively apologize if anything in this post comes across as insensitive or causes pain. I understand that everyone has their own views and I am simply sharing my own. The only thing I want is to help those that are still suffering and I thought this was the least I could do.

I love you all.

P.S. PLEASE READ THE LINK OF NOTHINGWORKS THAT I INCLUDED IN THIS POST. That post sums up everything that i have said much more eloquently than I ever could hope to.
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I think Peter Levine mentions a experiment done with animals who was exposed to stress repeatedly where a "fight and flight" response couldn't be mobilised -so they immobilised, Shut-down. If they were exposed repeatedly to a threat the immobilisation response would take more time to go away. Each time more time to go away. So, chronic anxious self-monitorisation/fear of losing control might prolong this response. Dissociation is a sedated state so anxiety is reduced with all other emotions.
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