[Shadow Cat]

I went on a trip and I wasn't with my parents for the majority of the trip. That doesn't happen often since I'm too young to do many things alone. I was pretty happy while I was there, I was helping a family friend take care of horses and driving (carriage) them, which I love to do. I even went on long (carriage) drives out in the open country without having a single panic attack. Usually, when I go far from my "comfort zone" which is the house, I get nervous thinking, "This would be a really be a bad time to have an episode of derealization." That almost always triggers an episode for me. When my parents came back, I was pretty sour. I was still OK as far as DR goes. But, the minute I got out of the car and was home, I had intense DR. I still sort of have it, but it's better now. Do you guys think being with my parents all the time stresses me out and causes DR for me? Maybe being home symbolizes going to school and being home a lot and causes stress, which causes DR. Stress seems to be my only cause of DR. When I'm completely unstressed, I actually feel pretty normal.

 

[Guest]

Anxiety is one of the primary causes of dp/dr, especially the derealization. Indeed, though there is little evidence for it in regards to precedence, I think that your idea of your house reminding you subliminally of stressors such as school and your parents is a very good hypothesis, considering that many of the more painful interactions with one's parents and residual anxiety and pain from school are tied to the home.

How long have you had dp/dr? If the symptoms have been persisting for a long time, it may be prudent to determine the underlying cause. If you ever want to talk about this, or just rant, or even just chat, please don't hesitate to ask.

Yours truly,
XEPER

P.S. I am a student, too, so I know exactly how you feel.

 

[peaceboy23]

Hey...i'm having kind of the opposite and same response at the same time, if this makes any sense at all. I have been coming home and staying here with my paretns (i live in an apartment across town) because I can't stand being alone in my apartment, and I am getting major panic attacks and dp/dr there. I think part of it is that there is a lot of pain that happened there (my roommate in my apartment passed away in september) and i dont' have another roommate (the other one moved out), and i had some bad hangover dp episodes there. Anyway, I've been staying with my parents and it is somewhat better, but at the same time it is hard. First of all, it makes me feel almost like a failure, that I can't make it on my own right now, and need help. Also, there is the stress of not wanting to upset my parents wtih letting them see how much i'm hurting right now. Also, i have long felt (for no particular reason, they want me to be more honest) that i need to hide my failures and my inadequcies and short comings from them. To be honest, I would like to take time off from work just to focus on myself, but i feel this would make me a failure, and I don't want to disappoint everyone, from my parents to my co-workers, or even let everyone know i have ISSUES :roll: Part of this whole problem is that when my brohter was going through major depression and suicidal thoughts, I became the happy, perfect child. I think this might be where a lot of my dp started...even when I really entered my ocd and depression phase, i hid a lot of that from my parents. Anyway, i'm kind of rambling, but i've noticed that the dp is a little better here at home, but the dr is worse. It's like, i look around and this is my house, but itall looks so odd, and it's like i just think "when and how did i get here?" even though I know exactly how i got here (of course).
I guess this might not really have much to do you with what you were talking about, but I definately understand the feeling of being great when you are out with friends in a differnet place (i have experienced a few times being way outside my comfort zone, and being fine) and then when you get back to you "normal" life, it all comes back. this could very well speak to a major cause of our dp/dr...that there is something in our "normal" life that is really causing us pain and hurt and is leading us to detach from ourselves and our environments. Sometimes, i wonder if I'd be better if i just packed up and moved across the country...