Hi. I have a question: does anyone have experience with suppressing/repressing panic attacks? Is that even a thing?
Now sime cintext: im in my late teens, and I honestly can't remember a time when I didn't have dissociation. It's only dr for me, no dp, and I never got the feeling that im looking at myself from third person and all that. The world is just... plain. Like, everything registers and I'm functioning normally, but nothing connects at all you know?
Pretty obviously i have anxiety. The thing is, i always had that common feeling of pressure inside me, and at the worst it got so heavy i felt ready to burst, but there was no release due to dissociation. Imo, that's the worst feeling in the world: the feeling that is there, but can't be released. But in recent years i started to get better, and now i sometimes get periods of time where i can feel things and the degree of dr decreases.
With some help from a friend i got to a point where i actually had a panic attack. And I felt so relieved after that. Now i manage to have panic (anxiety?) attacks again sometimes, but i still have to put conscious effort into just... letting the attack proceed? It's like i repress stuff on autopilot. Hence my questuion had anyone else had similar experiences?
Edit: accidentaly posted an unfinished draft, finished it now.