[Kelson12]

DP/Depression/Anxiety and relationships, a tough combo.

I've been dating the same girl for almost 10 months. We broke up last night and then this morning talked and agreed that we are gonna take a break from each other and then go from there.
Basically it is all me. I am the one who initiated all this. I just don't know if I have the right feelings for her. I've felt hot/cold with her for a while, but always kinna just let it go. Also, there were times I thought it was the depression/DP, etc.
There is really nothing that she ever did wrong. Just that some of our views on things and ways of living life differ. Also, I just don't know if I am physically attracted to her.
Buuuuut, I also wonder if it is the DP/Depression that is playing a role in this. Am I thinking too much?
What are others experiences with relationships and DP/Depression?
I appreciate your input! Take care.

Kelson

 

[Guest]

I think if you are unsure about your relationship with her that its a good thing that you are taking time apart and exploring other options. I know this sounds cliche but " there are millions of fish in the sea"....... which is the truth. Plus your still young man, if you tie yourself down right now you might regret it later.

I dunno what im looking for, I dunno if i want a serious relationship, or just some girl (s) to mess around with, and im even younger than you lol

 

[Guest]

I just saw this girl I was waiting for ages to return from Spain where she had been for 6 months, and when she returned I acted like a total basket case. Funny thing is, she is almost exactly who I had been beofre I got this disroder and I had pissloads in common with her, and my major screw up with her that night has left me listless and I realize that I am conversationally inept with attractive women at this point. I'm sure that the 18 year old version of me would have had no problem spooning this chick, but its not very prudent to slip into psychosis on a semi-date.

I'm seriously scared of dating right now, but with some rehabilitation, i'll get back in the swing of things...hopefully patch things up with her, but more likely find another one of the rare women who can stand me.

 

[person3]

No, it's mostly the chemistry between you and the other person.

Someone you REALLY want will get your mind off the DP at least for the moments you realize you like them

I dunno...personally I feel it's ideal to, if you meet someone, don't even mention the problems until you guys are exclusively together and somewhat serious. And another thing...if you DONT talk about the DP you aren't FOCUSED on it as much. If you spill all at the beginning it's just focusing on it more AND you could be revealing a little too much (would you want a girl to tell her about your yeast infection on a first date? yeah. Nothing wrong with a yeast infection or DP [a chronic yeast infection would probably be worse though], but they are just things you kind of hold off on until you guys are comfortable with each other.)

Now go take some Diflucan for that infection. :lol:

I read something interesting...something about if you want sympathy and you constantly go on about your problems, you will scare people away. But if you act as if nothing is wrong and have an inviting attitude, you eventually forget about your problems and the person will eventually like you so much that when you ARE having a REALLY bad day they will be there for you. Not a guarantee, but if the person likes you this is probably the best way to approach it.

 

[sleepingbeauty]

i think what you are experiencing has alot to do with the dp. how the f#ck are you supposed to know how to feel about another person if you dont even know how to feel about yourself?? thats what i experience everyday and little by little it destroys every chance i have at happiness. its like self sabotage.

 

[maria]

I believe dp affects everything, so it may be hard to tell if it's you or dp not having feelings for someone. But probably you'd still recognize the right person. My lack of relationships is hopefully partly due to dp (and not the fact that I'm a freak). I admire how people are able to get into loving relationships while being somewhat a mess, the only way I could get into one is to chain myself to some poor fellow (and then watch him chew his leg off).