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Hello all.

My Experience
I developed dp/dr when I was 18 years old, having been anorexic and bipolar. I went through a long stage of mania where I lost reality. What really triggered my dp/dr was my experience using LSD. While tripping, existential thoughts raced through my mind as my reality became distorted. I was going through a lot of emotional pain at the time and the LSD tipped me off the edge into a pool of anxious thoughts about existence/reality. My dp/dr included losing my memories, sense of self, belief system, connection to family and friends, and emotions. My reality looked plastic and I was stuck in my mind searching for answers. I believed that I am unconscious, disconnected, unable to perceive and experience. Completely dissociated, time went by extremely fast. I did not interact because I was afraid of hurting people by the things that I said. My thoughts led me to believe that I did not work anymore and I became heavily suicidal.

Recovery
I am 2 years in the process of healing. The first step is to recognize that something is different and causing you to stress. You have the awareness that something is off but it is unexplainable. Most people will not understand unless they’ve experienced it, but there is a way out. I went to therapy as soon as I had my first panic attack from these intense thoughts that were unstoppable. I had no hope in therapy at this point because I believed nothing to be true. Nothing had any meaning. But we create the meaning. I had to switch therapists because I was not getting better. I did try psychiatric drugs too. I tried Latuda, Cerequil, Abilify, Lexapro, Wellbutrin, and none of them made any difference until I went on Lamictil which is actually helping. I went to an art therapist who dives into expression. The key is to surround yourself with positivity, positive people, supportive friends, and reach out whenever you need. Eventually you can experience what it is like to be included again, feel like a part of something again. Good experiences improve dp/dr. What also helped immensely was MEDITATION. Being in the present moment is key to release yourself from your thoughts. Time is basically unreal. We are the awareness of what we are experiencing, so when things become silent we can gain clear perspective and feel SAFE AGAIN. This disorder is anxiety induced and analyzing it will not help. Seeing beauty will help. CREATING will help. Draw whatever you’re feeling weather it is scribbles, shapes or colors. It is way more fun to analyze a drawing than to analyze life anyways. You are safe and no one can read your mind. You can recover.
Best to all.
 

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Lovely,
after 2,5 years i start to realise this, that there is actually nothing to figure out with your thoughts, but actually just to live life and to do things that make you feel like a part of something again.
Even if its small things.

I think that this is my first evening that i realized that and i will meditate and visualize myself on how i was before on a regular bases now.

Hope and prayers go out to those who are suffering, and to myself that we all one day can get this joyful feeling of being you again.
 
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