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RECOVERED - What helped me and what happened to me.

5K views 4 replies 4 participants last post by  Jjj123 
#1 ·
Hi all,

This is going to be quite long but basically after 3 month and a half of 24/7 drug induced dp/dr I am finally cured and starting to live again.

Basically, about 4 month ago I went on a night out and tooks drugs mixed with a lot of alcohol, went home and decided to smoke a joint before going to bed which resulted in my first ever panic attack which lasted for about 8 hours. I decided the best thing would be to sleep it off, but when I woke up everything seemed like I was in a dream state, I had very high anxiety and multiple panic attacks without any reasons.

I had the most stupid idea back then, obviously, was to google all of my symptoms. So Dr.Google of course told me that I might a brain tumor, I would be stuck like this for life, I might have an ireversible mental ilness... and more.

Which obviously resulted in more and higher anxiety and severe panic attacks and the dp/dr became worse and did not ever stop.

I then decided to see my GP who then told me this might stop very soon, I just needed to be patient and gave me some pills for anxiety.

This did not work and I still had no idea what was going on with me.

It was so bad I could not go to work anymore or get out of my bed. I even ended up in a hospital twice due to severe panic attack and my heart racing too much.

Everything looked weird, I did not recognize myself in the mirror, could not control my thoughts anymore , stayed in bed for weeks, and everytime I would go outside or speak to people or do anything I would panic due to the fact that the whole world seemed different and unreal and that something was definitely wrong with me and that I might stay like this forever.

I would also have jaw pain and sweaty hands all the time.

I then decided to see a psychiatrist who told me what I had was, she told me this was call depersonalisation and this was simply my anxiety and brain playing tricks this has nothing to do with the weed or drugs. This was simply triggered by it maybe.

My GP also put me on a very small dose of SSRI to help with the anxiety - this is of course medication and the treatment can last for several month or more and this is not mandatory to cure. - I decided to try it and it did help me a bit to go through this.

I then decided to try meditation, sleep hypnosis, food supplement ( omega 3-6-9, vitamin C, multivitamin ) eating well, I stopped any kind of drugs and alcohol and even reduced cigarettes a lot I went from smoking a pack a day to smoking only 2 to 4 day and stopped coffee or any source of caffeine.

And I also decided to focus on myself, take time to think about myself, spoke about this to my friend and family and their support where really needed and it was nice to know I wasnt alone even if dp/dr is something extremely difficult to explain ( I feel like I sound crazy when I try explaining what dp/dr is and how I feel ).

And also I accepted it, I just kept telling myself that this is a reaction due to me probably going out too much, drinking and smoking too much, probably not sleeping enough and I also have a stressful job so I am pretty sure this was a way for my body and mind to tell me : "Stop, you need to really calm down now.." I just decided that whatever this thing I have just now, this horrible feeling DP/DR is a thing, I know what I have now and no matter how long it takes to go away or not, I will learn how to live with it and accept it. - I even went to see a spiritual healer which was interesting as this helped a bit.

So I really took baby steps, which means that I started going back to work slowly, then going out again but not too much without drinking and not more than once a week or less, I started doing different things like dance classes or yoga classes , gym, swimming pool, went for long walks, spoke to my family a lot about it whenever I needed to.

It's now been 4 month and I am not completely 100% cured, the DP/DR still happens sometime like once a day, but never last more than 30-40 minutes and some days not at all. But I do feel like I am getting better and better and I know that in a few month I shall be 100% completely.

I am now going out again, drinking again, back to coffee, even sometimes smoking weed again but never as much as I use to and very very occasionally ( which is not something I would recommend, I think the best thing would be to stop completely ) I am just going out but always taking it slow, which means drinking, but never too much, one coffee a day only, not going out too much and always take time and find moment to take care of myself. And I am so much better, in a way I am almost glad this happen as now I can really see what is important in life and it opened my eyes on so many things.

Here is a list of everything that helped me through this ( bear in mind that everyone is different and we all have our own ways ) :

  • -SSRI ( Only if this is recommended and okayed with your GP )
  • -Exercising
  • -Breathing exercise ( This can be found on google or Iphone apps )
  • -Food supplement ( Omega 3-6-9, multivitamin every morning and fish oil )
  • -CBT with my therapist - This is a treatment which helps you analyze your thoughts and works really well to reduce and help high anxiety
  • -Speaking about it to my close friends and family
  • -Taking time off
  • -Doing things and keeping my mind busy
  • -This website ( Especially the recovery section - this helps a lot, seeing other people going through the same thing and being 100% cured helpe me so much and their stories and advice did really help me through was I was going through )
  • -Chamomile tea and lavender oil
  • -Taking long walks - Also, this is very important, when you go for a walk or simply walk on the streets, it helps if you do not listen to music with headphones, listening to the noise around you helps you for grounding and feeling "here" "in the moment" - this helped for me
  • -Going out again slowly and taking it slow - this would show you that you can still have fun with DP/DR and nothing is ever over.
  • -Finding a good sleep circle
  • -Eating healthy
  • -PACIFIA - this is an app on Iphone which helped me a lot, this helps logging your mood, gives you tip for anxiety and there is a forum where you can speak to people experiencing the same thing - always helps to speak to people who know exactly what you are going through.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER : Whatever you are experiencing, any type or anxiety or/and DP/DR, this will not go away or be cured over night, it will take time, for some longer than others, but IT WILL GO AWAY it will be okay, you are all going to be fine.

This is just your brain playing tricks with you and your life did not change, only your perception. If you do the right things and taking the time of finding out what helps and what works for you, you will all be okay. Do not panic or research your condition all over google, this will make it worse.

Remember, you know what you have, you are not alone in this, you know who you are and you will be fine.

Bibi the french girl.

x
 
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#2 ·
Thank very much for the story, and congratulations on your improvement.

I would like to ask you if you had existential ruminations and the feeling that you are not controlling yourself.
If yes how were these symptoms in the beginning and how are they right now?
 
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