[jc]

im really feeling crap lately,it feels as though im closed in and shut off from the rest of the world....this is nothing new but i just wanted to vent a little as im really getting out and about lately but i feel as though im missing out on life...i meen i ask myself what i want from life and companionship seems to rank high on my list and yet im too busy in my own little world....
is it possible to change your outlook on life so you are happy with your own little lot...
lets face it we all do the same kind of things each day so why are some happier than others,i know of people that could spend a week in bed watching films and be happy but i cant sit for 10 minutes without telling myself that im wasting my life....my thought patterns really do need working on

all the best

 

[Guest]

Yea i feel the same way, like im stuck in a prison. I just dont feel like theres anything out there that can excite me or that i really have interest in. I just feel like im not working like im broken, i would like to be a little more hard working and motivated to do things but i just dont have it in me and if i try forcin it, it just feels fake. Well i guess its just part of the long process towards recovery, I am feelin better with the whole dp thing but still feel like i have no place in the world. I just need to change my whole outlook on life because i really dont like who i have become

 

[jc]

i have brief spells where im motivated but most of the time im still stuck in this box...its so fuckin annoying...also i feel immense guilt for staying in bed a little later than anyone else in the house it sometimes feels as though im being monitered as though im in some kind of prison with my folks as wardens...the simple answer would be to get my arse out of the house but i cant work and i cant afford it...im not blaming my parents but this mental enclosure sucks sometimes

 

[Guest]

yea i mean theres nothin we can do except complain about it or do something drastic and change the pattern

 

[Scattered]

I've been feeling better the last two days but have noticed something that is a little depressing. When I have DP or anxiety everything is a major tragedy, life takes on a significance even if its only suffering for the sake of suffering. I feel less DPed right now but notice I have no motivation whatsoever. I feel like I'm wasting my life but dont know how to light a fire under my ass to make myself change.The fire is usually the DP itself, hence this very weird circle. When I have DP and anxiety I feel the need to change and do what must be done to not be in that suffering, yet when I feel better, because I feel better, I have no motivation any longer to do anything. So what the hell am I supposed to do? I'm sure this makes no sense. I feel like I'm hard wired to be a lazy bastard who never goes anywhere in life because of the way my past has affected me and taught me to react to the world. And yet I also know I am responsible for myself and can change, but don't know how to make it happen.

 

[Guest]

Yes i feel the same way i just dont know every where you turn theres a problem, its like 1 giant maze. I just want to leave this disorder behind and just get my life back so i could make goals. I feel like im living in a long nightmare and i cant wake up

 

[Martinelv]

Jc mate - whatever you do, don't even think about 'accepting your lot' as it is. I mean, you're not happy are you ? You're like me in a lot of ways, except I don't suffer from such debilitating symptoms as you - I'm just a tosser. When I'm lying in my bed at my parents at a weekend, skint, miserable, no friends except the latest slapper I've diddled, feeling guilty at being a 33 year old man burdoning my parents, I definately do NOT want to accept that this is my lot. Perhaps you should be more selfish JC, like me. I REFUSE to let my 'problems' (whatever they are) stop me trying to squeeze some pleasure out of life. And there is a lot of pleasure out there if you want it.

 

[jc]

its strange because somedays i can take a simple walk along the river and feel content and happy(ish) but i seem to have all this energy but havnt got the motivation to do something about it (or the direction),for me its not really depression doing this to me its more of a case of me not being easily stimulated,it takes a hell of alot to get me interested in something....im kinnda grateful for my lot but i know theres alot of so called 'groups' out there...you know the sort ...line dancing,potttery classes, that kind of stuff, but its just not me,im serious when i say that i just hate any kind of interaction nowadays......

 

[maria]

Yeah. I hope I'm not really like this- unmotivated, numb, lacking energy and excitement. They say you're not as special as you think, but I do hope I'm a bit more special than this caricature of a human being. I fantasize about what I'd do if I was healthy, well there's nothing stopping me, you could say, except right now I really don't want to do anything, but normally I would...I know I'm wasting time doing nothing but at the same time everything seems waste of time too. Today at German class we had to talk about life goals and dreams and write down our life plan...had to lie as I had none of those. I really think there's some incredience lacking in my brain, I've got this burning sensation all the time but they probably haven't discovered such a substance yet. It's so hard to imagine someone else feeling excatly the same way or worse though I know there are millions.

 

[Scattered]

I feel the same way JC. My parents are always telling me to join a group on campus. But what possible kind of interaction can I have with these people? Unless the conversation is about life, death, god, meaning or something abstract and related to my obsessions I can't really hold a conversation. I've isolated myself so much I'm nowhere near the same mindset as my "peers". So I lack the motivation to interact yet I secretly yearn for some type of authentic connection with another human being and a normal life. Life is confusing.

 

[falling_free]

Unless the conversation is about life, death, god, meaning or something abstract and related to my obsessions I can't really hold a conversation.

What about a philosophy or debate group?? They will discuss things related to all the above. I am the same way in that im mostly only interested in talking about strange subjects or being analytical, but iv'e always been like that. In a debate or philosophy group you might be able to discuss your interests more freely with a group of like minded individuals, which would probably help in the long run and also make you feel less isolated, if less isolated is how you want to feel.