[128682]

so I’ve dealt with anxiety and pure o for a while, but I was able to live with it, without taking medication. it came back and for some reason I don’t have the energy to fight it... I feel mentally/physically drained! anything gives me anxiety these days and it sends me to dp/dr and I feel numb... It’s like in order to cope my mind/body numbs me out and it gives me even more anxiety because it makes me feel like I want to give up... I rarely leave my house because I get overwhelming anxiety. I don’t know who to talk to since my family never cared/cares because they don’t understand, I don’t have a doctor, nor do I have health insurance, which makes me feel like I have no option but to take the hits... and since it’s been cold, cloudy and rainy lately, it’s making it WORSE. I always seems to suffer so much around this time. I have this mentality that if I get help, that’s when I’ll snap and go crazy because I’ll “release” everything that has been on my mind and it’ll make me remember all the times I’ve suffered with this... and being in a hospital will send me and I’ll have a mental breakdown... which I haven’t experienced but i’m so scared... and for some reason that makes me feel like I HAVE to take the hits on my own in order to prove to myself that I will be okay... which I know is a unhealthy copping mechanism, but what other option do I have?