[Guest]

I'm starting to feel real again and I feel like I've been in a coma and just woken up. I've noticed how much I've let myself slip while I was in the DP coma and I'm trying to fix things now.
I've moved house a couple of times since my DP became severe and had to start all over with meeting new people and finding work.
While my DP was at it's worst I didn't really make any effort to make friends or have much of a social life so now I'm waking out of this I want to start going out and meeting new people.
The problem is that I feel alienated from the world because I've felt out of it for along time and just let the world drift by.
How do you ease yourself back into the real world? and how can you do it without it looking ovbious that your life has been on hold for years?
Thanks,
Laura.

 

[Guest]

Laura,

I've only had DP/DR for 3 months and am now recovering, so maybe I'm not the best person to give advice on the subject but I know that I completely avoided people, socializing etc. when I had severe DR/DP and to key to my recovery now is not looking back. You know what I mean? I don't look back and think about how I wasted time or lost friends etc. because I feel like I wasted time analyzing everything under DP/DR so now I just want to live....outside of my head.

I'm not completely recovered yet but I hope this helps=)
Congratulations on beating DP/DR!

 

[bat]

just go out there and treat each event/situation for what IT is, at that time. enjoy talking about trivial things that are happening. i think most people spend alot of time doing this and it'll be good for you. people will be interested in things you have to say about ordinary everyday things, and of course about themselves. they won't think twice about whether you've been out of society, only whether you're pleasant to be about in the present.

 

[kenc127]

Janine's answer to this same question when I posed it was, "Onward and outward." Unfortunately I didn't listen and now I'm back in lala land. Don't even look back because you may take yourself right back into a DP state. Deal with life as it comes and stay connected to people and things and you'll probably do fine. Congrats on your victory over this.

Ken

 

[Guest]

Tidal - I also regained a huge portion of my ego after about 3 months of the onset. I couldn't do anything. I'm still having the occasional relapses into that post-onset state, but they are few and far between.

 

[Guest]

Ken,

I think that the phrase "Onward and outward" summarizes it perfectly. I'm coming out of DP/DR and I feel that comparing days or trying to see "if my symptoms are better today than they were yesterday" etc. is all part of DP/DR itself since it still symbolizes analysis, obsessions etc.

What helped me the most lately is trying to worry about now only. I stopped trying to see if I'm better today than I was yesterday since these thoughts alone usually bring me back into DP/DR.

I think it is crucial to not look back. Maybe a long long long time from now, when I'm 100% ok, I'll try to see what happened and why I got into this state but I don't think it's necessary to think about it when recovery is rather recent. In reading Dr. Claire Weekes' book, I also noticed that she advises people not to measure progress, not to compare their symptoms day to day etc.

 

[Guest]

The only real way to get over 'it' is to not give 'it' as much credit as you think 'it' deserves. Since it's all psychological objectification of everything in the end. I agree it's ridiculous to 'monitor yourself' by keeping mental notes on anything. That's how the whole thing gets started. I used to say "Here come two days of anxiety, followed by two days of depression." What a bunch of crap. You only get over 'it', by allowing 'it' to control you, not by fear but by, instinct. The only thing 'it' is, is ourselves. Be a nutter for awhile and see how that turns out...it's better than worrying whether you're a nut or not right?

 

[Guest]

I could not agree more.

 

[Guest]

Become an existentialist. There is no fate, no plan, only life. It's helped me a bundle.

 

[Guest]

We're all involuntary existentialists here. I love philosophy, but existentialism can take the form of (good) humanism, (bad) nihilism, looping anxiety and fear (also bad). One out of three isn't good enough.