[Kieranwillz98]

I’m wondering if anyone on this forum has ever had a episode of psycho motor agitation before they had dp , I had it and ever since I had that episode my brain hasn’t worked the same like my brain was malfunctioning I kept pacing around the house not in control saying the same thing over over over , it was like my brain took so much stress and it just came out of me physically like my arm was shooting up and I couldn’t control it and jumping around like I was completely nuts and I couldn’t keep still it was like a mental breakdown or not sure if it was psychotic break I hope not but ever since then my dp has been the worse it’s ever been like because I wasn’t in control so much that it’s scared me that I’m not in control at all and it’s completely gone mind completely blank no thoughts no suggestions don’t know what I like any more , no memories , don’t know how I used to live the life I did working and walking around watching tv relaxing knowing I was in complete control were now it’s feels like I don’t have any and everything is so strange and wierd and I feel completely on a another planet dont feel derealization because I physically don’t think it’s real because I can’t know for sure. I think my brain is completely damaged or have schizophrenia but my psycho therapist don’t think so and I don’t know how …

 

[NoDevils]

It could be medication induced akathisia especially if you're on antipsychotics. It could be severe anxiety or mania. Far as the feelings of unreality, you're describing derealization with a mildly delusional character, a fairly common thing on this forum. I think when you say schizophrenia what you mean is psychosis. It is possible you could be in a mania or going into a psychosis, and yeah I'm sorry that's not soothing information. I think you could probably use more help than you're getting. Try to getting into some intensive treatment, possibly short term hospitalization or intensive outpatient, and please try cooperating with them.

 

[Kieranwillz98]

It could be that im in a psychosis but that means my life is over and I’ll never be how I was again ! I just literally can’t believe this happening to me it doesn’t feel real I’m only 25 I had everything going for me and now I’m going to be labelled as a freak and never see life the same I once did , I was hoping it was just anxiety and depersonalization but I’m just to out of it and maybe my blank mind and not feeling like it’s me doing everything and not knowing what do , like my minds not telling me anymore , reality not looking real and me feeling like I’m losing myself can’t have a shower , can’t really feed myself and nothing feels like it’s me at all but from like a spaced way I remember I had depersonalization last time and this feels much different like the way I seee things isn’t through like a tunnel vision before with loads of anxiety this time it’s like I’m seeing life normal but my brain is completely blank like the lights are on but nobody’s home 😭 my parents and everyone around me keep saying there’s nothing wrong I’ve had 4 sessions with my psychiatrist and he thinks there’s nothing wrong but anxiety and depersonalization but I don’t think he truest realises how bad I am as he only sees me for a hour every 2 weeks

 

[Kieranwillz98]

Only person who I can find on this forum who sounds alot like me is a person called ‘mezona ‘who doesn’t post on here anymore I messaged them but had to no reply

 

[NoDevils]

They're probably correct in telling you your problem is based in anxiety and agitation but they seem to be providing inadequate care. Prolonged severe anxiety and agitation can be very bad for people's health and functioning and can produce all the ill effects you're experiencing. It certainly isn't "nothing." I'm sorry if you were told your problem is nothing.

 

[leminaseri]

I’m wondering if anyone on this forum has ever had a episode of psycho motor agitation before they had dp , I had it and ever since I had that episode my brain hasn’t worked the same like my brain was malfunctioning I kept pacing around the house not in control saying the same thing over over over , it was like my brain took so much stress and it just came out of me physically like my arm was shooting up and I couldn’t control it and jumping around like I was completely nuts and I couldn’t keep still it was like a mental breakdown or not sure if it was psychotic break I hope not but ever since then my dp has been the worse it’s ever been like because I wasn’t in control so much that it’s scared me that I’m not in control at all and it’s completely gone mind completely blank no thoughts no suggestions don’t know what I like any more , no memories , don’t know how I used to live the life I did working and walking around watching tv relaxing knowing I was in complete control were now it’s feels like I don’t have any and everything is so strange and wierd and I feel completely on a another planet dont feel derealization because I physically don’t think it’s real because I can’t know for sure. I think my brain is completely damaged or have schizophrenia but my psycho therapist don’t think so and I don’t know how …

it is „just“ anxiety. nothing else. you can google symptoms of anxiety. you are just experiencing very high levels of it. for a psychosis you highly likely would have a prodromal state (which can last up to 5 years, and the signs are mostly slight.).

i once said to you that i had have the exact same things experienced in the beginning of 2020. im not schizophrenic yet and i wont get probably for life. i dont know what properly to make in such a state, but i just worried too much, and it fucked completely with my brain. this state will for sure pass but it is what you make out of it afterwards. the more worrying = more severe the dpdr after anxiety episode

 

[ThoughtOnFire]

What you are describing seems perfectly normal on the DP/DR spectrum.