[whataraindyday]

Hey...

Ok so... I've been struggling with anxiety and Dp/Dr my whole life, but it was never like that...
4 weeks ago, I passed out due low blood pressure. I then was really scared that I might have a serious heart problem. I was so anxious all the time - Turned out I haven't. After I knew that, I felt so exhausted the days afterwards and depressed. I thought: Will I ever get healthy again... Well. I was doing good compared to that..
So I had a Dp/Dr episode about 2 years ago, from which I fully recovered...back then my biggest fear was developing a psychosis (prodromal phase...)
So I then thought...ok what if I do now...
So the thing is...I do know from lot's of research what these symptoms are and I then think - maybe I have them too. And I can't let go of this thought, bc I then think that I'll really turn crazy.
I went to a psychiatrist last week- he told me he's pretty sure I'm not, but...well
So last night, I had a real bad panic attack... I then suddenly started to hear (from one ear) this sound of a melody/radio. I freaked out. Was it a halluzination? Anxiety? Or just the sound of the heater I interpreted as a melody?? I was so scared! I then thought: ok what if there's a radio? Delusional stuff like: idk maybe there's a radio in the wall - I ofc thought: ok that's sh.t. I mean rationally not possible. But I was scared bc: 1. Why did I hear that sound? 2. Why did I even think sth like that? 3. What if I start to believe or already believe things like that??
At that moment I was 100% sure I'm on the edge of a psychosis. Sleept really bad that night and now I'm even more confused.
I feel like my way of thinking has changed - I feel like my thoughts and the way I think are like I'm in a dream - a nightmare. Nothing positive... No future thinking. Like I'm not myselve.
Can someone please idk...like what's your opinion on that?
I started to take zoloft today...hope that helps a bit.
But the way it started with passing out and only physical symptoms to this deep whole of anxiety and feeling psychotic...jesus.

 

[xxmdogxx1]

Hey man,

I do remember when my Dp/DR was at its worst having auditory hallucinations... it spooked the shit out of me and made me question things even more exactly like you're saying. I know it won't change things overnight but it is helpful to know that truly crazy people often don't analyze or aren't aware of the processes like you're describing. I know it's still hard to relax about it but it will get better. I do remember harshly at it's worst though I was hearing things... Especially if I drank and was hung over that was the absolute worst, it was almost guaranteed I would go over the edge. Shadows running on the wall I remember too. It's an over active brain. If you take enough Adderall the same kind of psychoses can happen but it will go away after the drug wears off. Just try to get into a position wear the pressure valve can be released little by little and you'll feel better over time.

 

[Grindelwald]

As a recovered DP sufferer, I've found one lingering symptom is hypochondria. I remember a year ago or so I had a really bad headache and I leaped to the conclusion that I had a brain aneurism and needed to go to the hospital or I was a dead man. Needless to say I did not have a brain aneurism and I didn't end up going to the hospital.

Keep the faith.