if you were completely recovered that means your brain knows full well how to heal, the chemistry was back as it should. in other words, if you did it once you can do it again. calm down, relax, youre not going to die. just think of how you felt when you were back to normal. then have a talk with your brain. okay, we did it once, things are hard right now, but i trust that when the time is right you will bring me back to a real state again. you are not alone, this place is filled with people who have felt the same. breathing and all, its nothing new. just try to not think about it, try to enjoy the rest of your vacation. do you wanna talk about the stressfull event? i know nobody around you will ever understand the way you feel, maybe getting it off your chest to someone on this forum will help?