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Hello my name is Toni.

I've always been described as extroverted and eccentric and bubbly all my life. It's been so long I almost thought this facade I created for my self was true however time and time again I am reminded that while I make it seem like I care for those around me there has always been this sort of disconnect. I wondered if that was the reason I find it easier to cut off people from my life, as well as the reason I tend to get tired of others so quickly. I tend to disassociate as well and experience times in which I am floating watching the world unveil in front of me. I also have many moments of self realization where I question myself and reason with myself to try and make sense of my surroundings.

Does anyone else feel like even though they're emotionally disconnected and distant they over compensate emotionally to the point every thing you do seems spontaneous? I don't really know what to do and whether or not this mindset has been developed as a defense mechanism from the lower points of my life.

If you have any answers or similar stories to share please respond.
 
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