[Scattered]

I always obsess to some extent as part of my DP, anxiety/depression. However, the last few days my obsessions have gotten much worse. Usually they're just a sort of downer, but I've been feeling more anxiety and distress because of my thoughts. I can't get the idea of my inevitable death out of my mind. When I look at my life as it is, I can't find any possible reason for my existence. I stare at my arm or legs or body and don't know why they are there. Why am I a human being? Why am I alive at all? Time seems to be flying by as well. Days, weeks, months years....it doesn't make any sense. What do I have to look forward to? Being 80 years old one day, in a state of decay physically...probably halfway toward dementia.

The world seems so cold and distant. My mind seems to be getting out of my control. I'll get repeating thoughts, sounds, etc stuck in my head that cause me anxiety. I feel so cut off from anyone. From meaning in general. The fact that I've been sick the last few days isn't helping. I don't really know what to do. Hopefully it will pass.

 

[agentcooper]

hey scattered, i'm sorry to hear that i think it probably is a result of being sick, though. whenever i'm sick, my dr gets much worse. i hope you start feeling better soon...

 

[Beth]

I listen to unhealthily loud rock or metal when thoughts of absurdity/death won't go away, or I read Of Human Bondage.. that's probably just me.

I really hope you feel better soon. It's horrible to feel that way.

 

[Guest]

If you feel that life is passing you by, that you're helpless, then for God's sake, accomplish something before it's too late... you'll regret it if you don't.

I'm sure it will pass. In fact, my DP tends to fluctuate greatly. A friend and I won a table-football tournament earlier, and for a moment I lost myself in all the excitement (yes, I know it's sad). I actually felt the sweetness and beauty of life again. It was short-lived, though... vanished as soon as I walked outside. Typicality be damned! I kept obsessing over and over about my centre of consciousness. In a moment of stark realisation I discovered that I was actually elevated - that my line of sight is not all-encompassing, and that I targeted my 'being' directly in the centre of my brain. I actually felt as though I was a prisoner inside my own cranium. If that isn't DP I don't know what is, heh.

Out of curiousity, how long have you had this for now, and do you feel you're getting better?

 

[kchendrix]

You know what .. I get repeating thing stuck in my head used to happen alot now it is less since my therapist told me it was a part of OCD. View as white noise. Don't let it scare you ... My therapist told me when you get a thought stuck in your head .. try to think about, your mind becomes bored with it.

Anyway I hope you feel better.
KC

 

[Homeskooled]

Dear Scattered,
I just thought that I would share something with you about aging. The idea of aging and "wasting" my youth has always bothered me, but it really just hit me this morning, as I sat in my doctor's office, that this is it. This is as bad as it gets. What happens to me when I age? I get totally treatable health problems like high cholesterol and heart problems, maybe some achy joints. I'll get all kinds of problems that DP (or in my current state, porphyria) makes look like having the sniffles. I saw all these old people sitting in the doctor's office, and they looked peaceful. They arent bouncing off the insides of their brains trying to figure out what they are going to do with their lives - they dont have all that excess nervous energy. They're going to walk in to the doctor's, get their blood pressure checked, and go home to their wives and grandkids. They find most mental disorders dissipate with age, even schizophrenia, because the body slows down. Maybe its not something to be feared. John Nash, the scientist in A Beautiful Mind is on no meds. His schizophrenia went into remission in his 60s. Only a small percentage of the population actually gets dementia, much lower than the percentage with heart problems. I mean, if this is the toughest life gets, maybe its all downhill from here, but in a good way, like the way a rollercoaster loses momentum and finally slows down on the long straightaway. Maybe life isnt something to be so dreaded.

Peace
Homeskooled

 

[Scattered]

Deleted

 

[Guest]

Hi, i just wanted to throw a couple of thoughts up they are just observations on dp/dr, firstly most people seem to get dp/dr from some sort of stress occuring in their life. Eg prolonged anxiety, depression and from what i gather most drug related cases are from some sort of toxic overdose causing anxiety, aside from a few people who say that their lives were fine and they got dp/dr.
Which leads me to this, there is alot of evidence that says long periods of excess stress can and does have devastating effects to all parts of the human body, it poisons the blood, attacks the nervous system it sucks all the nutrience from our organs and especially the most nutrient requiring organ in our body our brain!
Once our brains are no longer recieving their required elements to function(protein, oxygen, water) we then are vulnerable to suffer complications.
So in a way whether it was long periods on excess stress or just one massive short burst of excessive stress(in the case of drugs) it seems logical that dp/dr may be due to certain problems with the improper functioning of the brain possibly due to organic reasons.
This also gives validation to why people say their dp/dr gets worse when they are sick or tired or stressed(as the body makes less seritonin when it is tired or sick) and to why some peoples dp/dr improves or is eraticated when they have successfull help from anti depressants, the problem why only some people benefit from anti depressants are that they only have about a twenty percent success rate with any disorders(contrary to what they advertise) but what it shows is by raising the level of required chemicals in the brain dp/dr seems to diminish, others also report on the benefits of exercise which is well known to create elevated moods. The value of deversion seems evident to benefit dp/dr which again is a form of exercise for the mind.
In closing i beleive that treating dp/dr as an organic problem in the brain caused by stresses of various natures could take some of the mystery away from this debilitating condition.
The study of orthomolecular medicine is based on using natural substances that are safe to repair damage in mental conditions, they key is the human brain is so complicated as thus far there is so little known thus finding the right treatments is not easy but hope is a powerful thing after all thats what most of us are living on.
I hope this is benificial to you or anyone that reads it and remember these are just my observations, all the best to all.
jj

 

[optimusrhyme]

I didn't ever wanna have to come back to this website... But my DP/DR has gotten bad, and I'm pretty scared. Along with it I have symptoms like pain all over, tingling, dizzyness, nausea, chills. Is this normal? Does anyone else feel this way...

 

[Welshlad]

Jordan13, I used to get panicky all the time. Alot of the things you have listed are what I felt after a mild panic attack or a long period of anxiety. It's entirely normal (for dp/dr, if you did not have dp I would suggest you see a doctor) to feel that way if you are anxious. Try to stop your thoughts from racing away and getting out of control. Focus on a task or maybe something you enjoy.

Scattered, can sympathise, been ill recently myself and it isn't a good mix with dr. hope u get well soon. btw boards of canada r class.

 

[optimusrhyme]

Thanks Welshlad, you brought me some relief---- I think I'm a bit of a Hypochondriac too because I keep thinking to myself that this is much worse then just anxiety and its something like MS... But I dunno I'm just very confused right now.

 

[Guest]

Hey Scatt. i dont fell like digging out Your old posts so ill just ask..r u under care of speciallist? As far as i know obsession (OCD,ODD,etc) r mostly conditions caused by serotonin deficiency in some part of the brain and with a proper care r not so hard to treat glhf!! hope ur doin better

 

[Scattered]

No I've been to two psychologists but am not currently seeing anyone. For me these problems are very episodic, at the moment I feel completely fine although when I wrote the post I was starting to get worried. Its usually just a matter of trying to not have things get out of hand and waiting for them to pass. Otherwise, I'm ok now.

 

[Guest]

No I've been to two psychologists but am not currently seeing anyone. For me these problems are very episodic, at the moment I feel completely fine although when I wrote the post I was starting to get worried. Its usually just a matter of trying to not have things get out of hand and waiting for them to pass. Otherwise, I'm ok now.

That's good to hear.

And btw, about BOC. A friend sent me a couple of their tracks and it seemed pretty deep, cerebral electronica. I'm thinking of buying an album, but they already have quite a few out. What album would you place as a good starting point?

 

[Scattered]

Music has the right to children

 

[Guest]

Yeah man whatever works,good that Your more or less in control cuz all the pills no matter why you take them wheter they make you fell better or not r afterall messing with your brain chemistry and i think if you can you should just say NO! like with marijuana :wink: .
Good to hear that youe better already