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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have had chronic depersonalization for over 2 years now and in the first year i had no sense of self and I didn't feel like I use to . After having depersonalization for so long i 100 % completely forgot who i was before depersonalization.
I no longer can say i dont feel like I use to as i forget and now all I can say is I have no identity , i dont know who i am at all !
I can't think of a future as i am no one , i float though every day doing whats expected of me , all the while not feeling a person thats Whole !
No purpose no meaning Nothing !
I feel different to everyone and everything and I don't know how to stop this .
Is this even depersonalization still to be honest I don't have much other symptoms of depersonalization other then emotional numbness and No Identity ?
 

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Yes, it's still depersonalization.

I have this problem as well, one of the worst symptoms for me and probably the reason my dp/dr got severe after constantly obsessing about who I am all the time. I don't know how to stop it either, but I think it will go away when you recover from depersonalization. I've had moments or even days where I've felt completely recovered and even got my identity back during those times. Unfortunately they don't happen very often.
 

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I’m sorry =(. For me from the beginning it was just terror and the unfamiliarity...then I just got used to it. Got used to pretending, acting, even though I felt like this imposter. Certain things never came back for me but my feelings did, attachments to memories did. It’s still hard 10 years later. I’m here if you ever want to talk <3
 

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This is exactly how I feel. I so get used to DP that I forgot how it is feel to be my old self. I feel like a walking camera and that's it. Life passing by me. Its like being passed away and wake up as a ghost with constant existential thinking on every issue, soul, God, universe. Everything just is losing it purpose. Terrible existential DP.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Hi Sharon
Thank you for replying
You sound as i am its very confusing isn't it? I try to remember how I use to feel but it's gone, all I know is i did not feel like this, that I'm sure of .
I have no idea who i am nothing its like a need to start a whole new life cause i just got chucked on this planet.
I feel trapped and really stuck its like im frozen in this exact moment , no future and no past , i remember my past bit there is a wall that blocks me from fully absorbing my past memories.
I also forget how I felt before like who was Allison for 31 years how did she act or feel , this is insane .
My moods change so fast i feel bipolar bit i am not .
Sorry I'm rammberling on it helps to get it of my mind .
 

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God, you sounds JUST LIKE ME, our symptoms are identical, yeah hun same here, have no got a clue what it feels like to be me before depersonalization set in, it is horrible, but the anxiety of it does get easier. The best way I describe it is its like stepping off a spaceship, you're in someone else's body with someones elses memory's, its like its not you controlling your body, rather that you are just observing it doing its own thing. Its not gone hun, I had this years ago and one day I woke up and it just vanished, just your mind protecting you hun xxxx
 
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