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Hey everyone! This is my first time reaching out to a group, I'm so glad I found this page. I recently discovered by my own research that I have DP/DR after years of therapy and nothing helping.
Little bit of a back story.. I'm 27 years old and have experienced severe depression and anxiety for several years. Mostly coming to light after I deployed to Iraq and was raped in 2016. I grew up with a emotionally neglectful father and a very unstable Mom who has many of her own mental health struggles that she has never tried to overcome.
After many failed relationships, I started realizing that something more was going on with me, that would especially flare up worse when facing extreme stress. I'm just starting my healing journey with DP/DR and learning more about it. I experience it in many different ways but mostly it's feeling unreal. Walking around a store feeling like I'm not real, like no one around me is real, like my surroundings aren't real. Being extremely disconnected from myself and my surroundings. Not feeling safe in my own home. I don't recognize myself in the mirror, I feel like I'm watching myself through a movie, like every movement I do I am watching from an outside perspective. I have a very hard time making decisions because I'm always in a heightened and triggered state. I have moments of intrusive thoughts that will NOT shut off. I cry a lot and feel like I have little control over my emotions. I've found that I push everyone away and isolate myself which makes things SO much harder. Dating is impossible when dealing with this as I think it triggers me more. I feel unsafe and vulnerable and end up running away. And then realizing how toxic I am makes me want to disappear.
I've worked with a couple therapists, no one who has experience with this disorder. I have a psychiatrist who also doesn't know anything about what I'm experiencing. I tried a few different anti depressants which may take the edge off but truly just numb me and help me not cry as often. I weaned myself off all meds recently. I've completed CPT for the sexual abuse I experienced and have done very little EMDR focusing on the emotional neglect from my father.
I'm at a place where I am truly ready to advocate for myself and make changes in my life. I'm willing to put in the work to create a better life for myself, I deserve to be happy and have inner peace! I stopped drinking alcohol and caffeine, no more weed as that makes my experience SO much worse, and I'm in the process of quitting vaping (nicotine). I eat quite healthy, lots of fruits and veggies. I don't eat very many processed foods or sugar. I need to exercise more on a daily basis but struggle to create a routine for myself.
I would love to be more involved in this group and meet other people! We aren't alone and we are capable of creating a happy live for ourselves! I'm very grateful that this group exists, please feel free to share your experiences. Let's support each other and help each other grow!
Little bit of a back story.. I'm 27 years old and have experienced severe depression and anxiety for several years. Mostly coming to light after I deployed to Iraq and was raped in 2016. I grew up with a emotionally neglectful father and a very unstable Mom who has many of her own mental health struggles that she has never tried to overcome.
After many failed relationships, I started realizing that something more was going on with me, that would especially flare up worse when facing extreme stress. I'm just starting my healing journey with DP/DR and learning more about it. I experience it in many different ways but mostly it's feeling unreal. Walking around a store feeling like I'm not real, like no one around me is real, like my surroundings aren't real. Being extremely disconnected from myself and my surroundings. Not feeling safe in my own home. I don't recognize myself in the mirror, I feel like I'm watching myself through a movie, like every movement I do I am watching from an outside perspective. I have a very hard time making decisions because I'm always in a heightened and triggered state. I have moments of intrusive thoughts that will NOT shut off. I cry a lot and feel like I have little control over my emotions. I've found that I push everyone away and isolate myself which makes things SO much harder. Dating is impossible when dealing with this as I think it triggers me more. I feel unsafe and vulnerable and end up running away. And then realizing how toxic I am makes me want to disappear.
I've worked with a couple therapists, no one who has experience with this disorder. I have a psychiatrist who also doesn't know anything about what I'm experiencing. I tried a few different anti depressants which may take the edge off but truly just numb me and help me not cry as often. I weaned myself off all meds recently. I've completed CPT for the sexual abuse I experienced and have done very little EMDR focusing on the emotional neglect from my father.
I'm at a place where I am truly ready to advocate for myself and make changes in my life. I'm willing to put in the work to create a better life for myself, I deserve to be happy and have inner peace! I stopped drinking alcohol and caffeine, no more weed as that makes my experience SO much worse, and I'm in the process of quitting vaping (nicotine). I eat quite healthy, lots of fruits and veggies. I don't eat very many processed foods or sugar. I need to exercise more on a daily basis but struggle to create a routine for myself.
I would love to be more involved in this group and meet other people! We aren't alone and we are capable of creating a happy live for ourselves! I'm very grateful that this group exists, please feel free to share your experiences. Let's support each other and help each other grow!
