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Hello

So I been suffering from depression and anxiety for over 3 years. It came on suddenly after years of abuse and trauma( war, abusive relationship, abuse in family) Over time I start noticing that my memories are fading and ones that I could access and remember I was not able to connect with it at all. I really didn't obsessed too much over it , but after a while and after a birth of my second child things took a bad turn. Now I feel like I have no emotions, I feel like I am a stranger to my self. I look at my self at the mirror and I have no idea who I am. Memories are hard to recall I know facts about me but details are gone. However I don't suffer from tunnel vision, or like I don't have control over my body. I did have ct scan two years ago and everything was normal. my blood work came perfect. No one around me notice anything different, but me. I just want to go back to my "normal" self, where I can feel happiness and joy. Please is there anyone that is going through same ,because I feel like I am the only one with this problem.

Thank You

Much love to all
 

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Hi redhead,

Sorry for all you've had to suffer over the years.

You are not alone! The kind of dissociation you describe is not uncommon. There are many others here who have either been through what you are experiencing or are going through it.

As real as it seems now, after it passes the experience will quickly fade from memory like a bad dream and you will be back to your normal self.

I have been through it a few times and recovered. My sense of self, my memories and my emotions all returned. If I think about it really hard, I can for a moment experience again what you're experiencing. However, my sense of self is very stable now, and I feel deeply grounded or rooted in my life. This gives me great resilience, so I can easily snap out of it.

I'm far from an expert, just someone who's had a lot of experience with some forms of dissociation and thought a lot about it. I recently joined this forum to help others going through it.

Your past issues seem complicated, so maybe a therapist would be useful in working through them, in addition to the dissociation.

My general advice is to distract yourself and do normal things -- whatever "normal" has been for you in better times. Don't let these thoughts and perceptions interfere with your life at all. They cannot do you any harm: they're insubstantial and illusory no matter how heavy and real they might seem.

At least for a while, avoid spending much time alone with your thoughts. It might also be a good idea not to spend much time on forums like this.

To overcome the feeling of dissociation, you need to stay active and engaged with your life physically, emotionally, socially, etc. Remember and reaffirm what is most important to you and center your life around it.

Surround yourself with good friends and loved ones, and devote yourself to your children.

I hope you start to feel yourself again soon!

Hello

So I been suffering from depression and anxiety for over 3 years. It came on suddenly after years of abuse and trauma( war, abusive relationship, abuse in family) Over time I start noticing that my memories are fading and ones that I could access and remember I was not able to connect with it at all. I really didn't obsessed too much over it , but after a while and after a birth of my second child things took a bad turn. Now I feel like I have no emotions, I feel like I am a stranger to my self. I look at my self at the mirror and I have no idea who I am. Memories are hard to recall I know facts about me but details are gone. However I don't suffer from tunnel vision, or like I don't have control over my body. I did have ct scan two years ago and everything was normal. my blood work came perfect. No one around me notice anything different, but me. I just want to go back to my "normal" self, where I can feel happiness and joy. Please is there anyone that is going through same ,because I feel like I am the only one with this problem.

Thank You

Much love to all
 
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