My latest calamity
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I think we should make this into a thread where everyone pitches in and tells us their own latest disaster. Mine?
I had my friends boyfriend ringing me last night telling me he "knew where I lived" and that he was coming round for "a word". I didn't know what the hell he was thinking, so I told him I was out, and would be at work the next day - then he asked when I was at work so he could find me there.
Eventually I managed to get him to go round to my friends (his girlfriend's) house rather than my own. She tried to calm him down a little, but apparently he had just flipped out and gone possessively crazy.
Turns out that one of my other friends had told him me and her were "messing around" together at the weekend. So he wants to kill me lol. But the worst thing is that nothing has happened whatsoever - and she's just a mate.
I'm probably going to have to confront him tonight, regardless.
I had my friends boyfriend ringing me last night telling me he "knew where I lived" and that he was coming round for "a word". I didn't know what the hell he was thinking, so I told him I was out, and would be at work the next day - then he asked when I was at work so he could find me there.
Eventually I managed to get him to go round to my friends (his girlfriend's) house rather than my own. She tried to calm him down a little, but apparently he had just flipped out and gone possessively crazy.
Turns out that one of my other friends had told him me and her were "messing around" together at the weekend. So he wants to kill me lol. But the worst thing is that nothing has happened whatsoever - and she's just a mate.
I'm probably going to have to confront him tonight, regardless.
G
Guest
·I offered to help a student with their brand new laptop and launched it down the stairs by accident. 
:lol: That is a classic Mr Mole. I can just imagine your embarrasment.
I've got quite a list, so let's begin with the obvious:
1.)Got caught by my mother doing the five knuckle shuffle, while wearing my sisters bra. (disclaimer - I was 15 years old)
2.)Didn't realise my ex-boss was a man > woman transexual and tried to come on to her/him. I only realised the truth when she gave the game away by farting like an elephant.
3.)Poured bleach in the bath instead of bubble-bath
4.)Locked myself IN a Caravan. I had to punch a hole in the wall and rip it open.
5.)Slept in a bin, in the snow.
I'll keep you updated.
I've got quite a list, so let's begin with the obvious:
1.)Got caught by my mother doing the five knuckle shuffle, while wearing my sisters bra. (disclaimer - I was 15 years old)
2.)Didn't realise my ex-boss was a man > woman transexual and tried to come on to her/him. I only realised the truth when she gave the game away by farting like an elephant.
3.)Poured bleach in the bath instead of bubble-bath
4.)Locked myself IN a Caravan. I had to punch a hole in the wall and rip it open.
5.)Slept in a bin, in the snow.
I'll keep you updated.
G
Guest
·I went to my friends house couple of days ago (can?t tell you when exactly, no wonder, huh?)
I met her mother on the stairs, but I thought its my friend, not her mother, so I said some kinda bullshit like: "Hey let?s go outside with dogs allright?" Well just then I realised who I was talking to. Uuuuhh.
Then I met her boyfriend upstairs, he was watching Big Brother on TV. So I said: "Oh man, you?re watching this crap?" he turn around like: "Well, yeah...?" And it was not her boyfriend, but her grandpa.
I don?t need to explain to her what?s wrong with me anymore, do I?
I met her mother on the stairs, but I thought its my friend, not her mother, so I said some kinda bullshit like: "Hey let?s go outside with dogs allright?" Well just then I realised who I was talking to. Uuuuhh.
Then I met her boyfriend upstairs, he was watching Big Brother on TV. So I said: "Oh man, you?re watching this crap?" he turn around like: "Well, yeah...?" And it was not her boyfriend, but her grandpa.
I don?t need to explain to her what?s wrong with me anymore, do I?
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816 Posts
Im psedeo humped by a dog after getting drunk off absinthe.
Also someone slapped there member in my face while I was on the ground once.
Im lame and not hardcore at all
Also someone slapped there member in my face while I was on the ground once.
Im lame and not hardcore at all
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816 Posts
The lol
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234 Posts
Martin, slept in a bin? in the snow? I'd like to know more about that one.
and why were you wearing a bra, do guys like that?
and why were you wearing a bra, do guys like that?
I'll have you know I am quite proud of my man breasts. I don't need to buy milk.
Wearing a bra....hee hee.....well, you know, kids experiment. I've never done it since. Well, not for free anyway.
The bin thing is simple. I missed my train home, 3am in the morning, so I decided to sleep in a bin. It wasn't big enough to fit the entirety of my bulk inside, so I woke up with a foot of snow on my head.
Wearing a bra....hee hee.....well, you know, kids experiment. I've never done it since. Well, not for free anyway.
The bin thing is simple. I missed my train home, 3am in the morning, so I decided to sleep in a bin. It wasn't big enough to fit the entirety of my bulk inside, so I woke up with a foot of snow on my head.
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234 Posts
forgive my ignorance but what is a "bin" like a garbage bin? and if not then what are they and why are they just sitting on the streets?
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723 Posts
martin, i would think it incredibly cute if a guy at a bar was hitting on me and fell off of his chair...especially if he was sober at the time. it would get me in the sack waaayyyy quicher than if he were just feeding me pat lines and trying to be all smooth. and guys who wear makeup can be very sexy...
i don't know about a guy in a dumpster, though... :lol:
here are a couple of my wierd drunken experiences (not all of them though...i've had quite a few)...
-puked on top of a bar with tons of people standing around. they made me clean it up.
-met a japanese guy and proceeded to speak spanish (the whole night) with him because i was convinced at the time that every foreign language was the same thing and he could understand me.
i don't know about a guy in a dumpster, though... :lol:
here are a couple of my wierd drunken experiences (not all of them though...i've had quite a few)...
-puked on top of a bar with tons of people standing around. they made me clean it up.
-met a japanese guy and proceeded to speak spanish (the whole night) with him because i was convinced at the time that every foreign language was the same thing and he could understand me.
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723 Posts
hey! i have had that as my quote when you were still in diapers :lol:
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